Suturing a Heart
by Amiyrasmom
Summary: An AU of Grey's Anatomy brought on by reading too much Mer/Mark fanfics. What if Meredith Grey knew Mark Sloan long before the show started and they were close friends? Let me know what you think.
1. A Hard Day's Night

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy and its characters are not mine. If they were then Meredith would be with Mark. Obviously.**

**A/N: On October 11****th**** my uncle was killed in a car accident and my aunt was severely injured. It's been kinda tough to write since then. I never realized how much of an impact my uncle Irvin had on my life until he was gone. Anyway…yeah that's all the apology you're going to get for how long it's been since I've posted anything.**

**I know I should be working on my Sherlock stories but Grey's Anatomy has kinda taken over my brain. It'll fade and I'll be back to Sherlock soon. I always go back to my boys. Always.**

**Background for this story: Mer and Mark met during her Europe tour before Med school. They hit it off and ran around Europe together. Their relationship is complicated to anyone on the outside but simple to them. They're friends first and they support and adore each other without judgment. They tell each other everything…mostly. They keep the dark and twisties away from each other. They're both damaged and scary separately but together they are whole and healed. Yes, they will end up together eventually. Most of the details will come out in the story but if you have any questions leave me a review and I'll answer to the best of my ability without spoiling the story.**

**We all know what happens in the episodes…er, at least we should. Anyway, this is going to be a series of telephone calls and stuff between Mark and Meredith until Mark makes his way out to Seattle. Then it'll be in a normal story type form. I know Mark is going to come to Seattle earlier than he did in the show simply because Meredith is his friend and she needs him I'm just not sure when yet. It is Meredith and Mark centric so be prepared for that. Let me know what you think.**

**On with the fun!**

**A Hard Day's Night**

Meredith Grey locked the door of the house behind her and hurried down the stairs to her car. Derek had been gone when she'd finished her shower which was good. She pulled her phone from her purse and set it in the cradle attached to the dash. She turned the ignition on and then hit one to speed dial her best friend.

"Hey Angel girl," his warm comforting tone filled the silence of her car as she backed out of the drive. "You're fine. You're going to be great."

"How do you always know?" She laughed at him. He always made her laugh.

"Just do. It's one of my many talents." He replied, in a smug tone. "Where are you? Please tell me you're not late. The Angel of Death is never late. Early, sure but never late."

"Funny Marky, really funny." She gave the phone a halfhearted scowl. "Don't call me that. Die called me Death and you call me Angel. Don't mix the two. It's weird. And it's not my fault. Well, okay, so it kinda is. I know better than to drink tequila and sleep with hot guys the night before a new job and I did it anyway. I'm so screwed."

His delighted laughter made her smile. "You'll be fine, Angel. You always are and I'm just a phone call away if you need me. And give me the details on the hot guy? Please?"

"No on the details because I don't have time and yeah," she giggled. "I know. You know I love you, right?"

"I know." He answered in a serious tone. "Love you too, Angel. Knock 'em dead."

"I really don't think that's a good idea, Mark," she giggled. "I'm a doctor. I'm supposed to save lives not lose them."

He laughed again. "What do I know? I'm a plastic surgeon. I don't deal in life and death. Too much pressure. You, on the other hand, the thrill totally enthralls you. You're gonna be so good at this."

She grinned her confidence boosted by her best friend. "Yeah, you're right."

"I'm always right." He told her.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith stared around the hospital corridors fuming to herself. She should know how to get to the CT room. But she didn't. Mark was going to laugh when she told him. This was so…stupid.

And this girl was seriously starting to piss her off. Beauty queens always did. They were so shallow. And she wouldn't shut up.

She finally found the CT room, got Katie's scan and took the still whining girl back to her room. Her stomach chose to growl at that moment and she realized that it was lunchtime and she hadn't had time for breakfast. She pulled out her phone as she headed for the cafeteria.

"Right, you're busy. How's surgery? I only have a few minutes and just wanted to check in. First day's okay so far. 15 year old seizure patient. No clue why she's seizing. Medical mysteries are a good way to start the first day. But uh, yeah, she's a beauty pageant girl. Got lost on the way to CT. So kinda sucks. But not, you know? Anyway gotta go. Call you later."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith spotted the other interns in her group after she'd paid for her food and headed towards them. Maybe she should try to make some friends. Besides she needed someone to bitch to since Mark was unavailable.

"Katie Bryce is a pain in the ass," she announced as she plopped down at the table with the other interns. She leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest. "If I hadn't taken the Hippocratic Oath I'd Kevorkian her with my bare hands." Utter silence fell over the table as the others all stared at her in shock. "What?" She asked confused.

There were mumbles that she couldn't quite understand and she realized that these interns thought she was serious. She really wished Mark hadn't been in surgery when she'd called. He always got her humor.

"Good afternoon, interns," Dr. Burke, the Head of Cardio greeted them before anyone could make an articulate response to Meredith's comment. "It's posted, but I thought I'd share the good news personally," he said as he walked passed them to stand beside O'Malley. "As you know, the honor of performing the first surgery is reserved for the intern that shows the most promise." Suddenly they all sat a bit straighter. Meredith resisted the urge to roll her eyes for at least the hundredth time that day. She knew where this was headed. It had been one of her mother's favorite moves on the first day for a bunch of new interns. "As I'm running the O.R. today," Burke continued. "I get to make that choice." After a pause he put his hand on O'Malley's shoulder. "George O'Malley."

Everyone's eyes widened in surprise, even O'Malley's. Everyone's except Meredith's. In that moment she really hated Dr. Burke. George was a puppy dog. It just wasn't right to kick at puppies. "Me?" George stuttered out.

Burke smiled down at him. "You'll scrub in for an appendectomy this afternoon. Congratulations. Enjoy it." He walked away.

Complete silence fell over the table again. Meredith gave a terrified George a sympathetic smile that he didn't see as the other interns all let their jealousy eat them up.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Katie Bryce's parents were full of questions. Meredith knew the answers to most of them but she didn't feel comfortable giving them out on her first day. She made her excuses and fled to Bailey's side.

"Katie's parents have questions," she told Bailey. "Do you talk to them or do I ask Dr. Burke," Meredith asked.

"No, Burke's off the case," Bailey told her impatiently but she still patted Meredith's shoulder to show that she wasn't angry. "Katie belongs to the new attending now, Dr. Shepherd." She stretched up and ran her eyes over the bustling room. She pointed in front of Meredith and then turned away. "He's over there."

Meredith took two steps forward and stopped abruptly when she spotted him. Oh this was not good. Not good at all. She started to back away but his eyes caught hers and she froze. He blinked and she bolted pulling her phone out of her pocket as she fled.

"Oh crap. Oh crap. Oh crap." Meredith muttered into the speaker as she fled down a corridor.

"Still lost, Angel?" He laughed. His angel was always amusing when she was worked up and it was never very difficult for him to calm her down once he started trying.

"No. No. Crap. Hot guy's here. HERE, Mark. And he's an attending. And I'm on his service because my seizure patient is now his case. Crap. Could I get any more screwed? Mark. Mark! Stop laughing!" She fumed at him even as his delighted chuckles warmed up her insides and calmed her nerves some.

"Only you, Mer, only you." And it was true, he mused to himself. Only Meredith Grey could sleep with a guy and then find out he was her boss. Meredith's troubles suddenly made his own seem trivial. He wasn't surprised. Meredith made everything manageable for him without even trying.

"Thanks." She griped at him sarcastically. "That helps so much. Gotta go, I'm running away and he's gonna catch me. Oh and Mark? Stop laughing! God, I hate you." She shut her phone and turned to face Derek.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark snapped his phone closed and grinned down at it. He wasn't sure why his Angel had started calling him about every little thing in her life but he was glad of it. She always managed to brighten his day just that little bit more.

Her daily phone calls made losing Derek hurt just a bit less. He hadn't told her what he'd done yet. She was trying to start her life in Seattle with all of its memories and pain and he didn't want to add to it. She had her own darkness to deal with she didn't need his added to it.

Mark slipped his phone into his pocket and pulled out his patient's chart. He had another boob job to do. Sometimes he really hated plastics.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Feeling better?" Mark asked as soon as he picked up the phone.

"No. I still hate you. You're a rat bastard. And he's following me and undressing me with his eyes and he wants me to go out with him on Friday." She pouted to him.

"So go." He encouraged. It would do her good to get out and try to have a normal relationship. She needed some kind of stability in her life besides him. He wanted her happy and at the moment she really wasn't. She put on a very brave and convincing front but she'd never been able to hide from him.

"No. He's an attending." She tried to explain.

"You'd go out with me," he pointed out with a cocky smirk at his office wall.

"That's different. I've known you for years. And you wouldn't give me any favors. I hate plastics." She whined halfheartedly.

"I'd give you favors if you liked plastics, you know." He told her. He really would too. Meredith was good. He knew she was and he'd happily have her assisting him in the O.R.

"Duh. It's still different. What am I gonna do Mark?" She shook her head not really expecting him to answer that question and hurried on to a new topic. "And now I've got this other guy that's got a crush and everyone's calling him 007 cuz he screwed up an appendectomy and nearly killed the patient." She told him quickly.

"A crush hunh? Really? I never would have figured that would ever happen to you." He grinned at his own sarcasm. His Angel had been the subject of more crushes during college and Med school than he had. It was hilarious to him. Normally she never even noticed so this guy must be crushing hard.

"Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, Mark." She huffed at him and then ruined it with a giggle.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith pulled out her phone with shaking hands. Even after throwing up she was nearly hyperventilating. This was awful. What had she done?

"Mark." She gasped out as soon as he picked up. "I nearly killed her. I…I…" She felt the tears gathering in her eyes and it irritated her. This was stupid. She had made a mistake but if wasn't irreparable. Katie was okay now. She hadn't died.

"Shh, Angel. It's alright. Calm down for me. Deep breaths. In. Out. Come on, Mer. Come on. Breathe with me. Shh. In, Angel. Breathe. Out. Good girl. Good. Couple more. Good girl. What happened, Angel?" Mark spoke to her in his most soothing voice. It was the only way he knew to calm her down without being beside her. It normally worked wonders when she'd become stressed over her exams or papers. He really hoped it worked for this too.

"Katie…the seizure patient." Meredith finally calmed down enough to explain to him in a shaky voice. "She seized and I didn't run to the 911 because she'd been bugging me with them cuz she was bored. Her heart…it stopped. We got it back but it stopped and he yelled at me and told me to get out. And then Bailey yelled at me. I…I didn't know it was really an emergency."

Mark closed his eyes, bit his lip and drew in a deep breath to keep himself from yelling at her. Really, she should know better. However, at the moment he wasn't a doctor he was her friend. He couldn't yell at her for making a mistake. Her bosses had already taken care of that so she needed him to be understanding even if he really felt like pointing out what she'd donw wrong. "Mer." He finally said slowly. "It's okay. It's your first day. You're okay. Keep breathing. You'll be all right. You didn't lose her. She'll be fine. You did good." He did the best he could to reassure her.

"I nearly killed her," she shrieked at him. She had been expecting him to yell at her too before he did the whole comfort and reassurance thing.

"But you didn't. You brought her back, right? You did good." He told her again and realized that he wasn't lying to make her feel better. It was only her first day and she hadn't ended up killing the girl.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"He's gonna let one of us scrub in on the procedure if we can diagnose her! We just need to figure out why she's seizing!" Meredith's voice was no longer shaky or tired. She sounded excited and chirpy.

"That's great, Angel! You'll figure it out. And then you'll get to scrub in on your first shift." He grinned into the darkness of his bedroom. Sure it was like nine o'clock in the morning but that was what they made heavy curtains for. Addie stirred against his chest and snuggled a bit closer without waking up.

"You know…I don't actually want to scrub in with him. He's mean. And when he's not mean he's being all charming and sexy and…I just want to fix her." She claimed in a sincere tone. He knew, though, that given half a chance she'd jump on the surgery. She was a surgeon after all and any time in the O.R. was a good time.

"You'll diagnose her in time, Angel. Give him a chance, Mer. Maybe he's your knight in shining scrubs or whatever." He really hoped this doctor was the one for her. He was happy with Addie and he wanted Meredith to be happy too.

Meredith snorted out a laugh. "Whatever. You know I don't really believe in that stuff. Love you though. Gotta go hit the books and save the girl. Hey! Maybe I'm the knight in shining whatever." Her infectious laughter rang out at that thought.

His husky laugh filled her ear in response. "Nah, you're an Angel. My Angel."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"He picked me. I didn't even want it and now my only friend here, or possible friend, Cristina, isn't speaking to me and I told her. About the night. And now she isn't speaking to me because he's a jerk. Why did he pick me? I let her convince him. I told her she could have it and he gave it to me. I tried to tell him I didn't want it but the words froze in my throat."

"She'll forgive you. She can't hold his actions against you forever." He soothed. He'd known she'd take the surgery. She'd have to. She was a surgeon at heart. As much as she'd fought it and as much as she ranted about surgeons being arrogant, cutthroat jerks she was still destined for greatness.

"I didn't get into Med school because my mother's famous! And I didn't get into the surgery because he slept with me! I got in because I figured it out! Me. I did it. I deserve this chance." She ranted with a bit of pride in her voice.

"Damn straight, Angel." He encouraged with more than a bit of pride in his own voice. There was his fiery Angel girl. The one that no one could keep down. He'd been wondering where she'd gone.

"I'm still going to ask him though," she continued. "And if he picked me to be on this surgery because I slept with him I'm giving it to Cristina."

"He didn't," Mark assured her. "You're good, Angel. Anyone would be lucky to have you beside them in the O.R. You're calm and patient and you don't crack under pressure. He chose you because you're the best."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"George's parents tell everyone that he's a surgeon like he's some kind of superhero he said. All I could think was that my mother said I couldn't hack it." Her voice was quiet, introspective.

"Your mother's an idiot. You're gonna be great." He told her in the same hushed tone she had used. He leaned back in his desk chair and put his feet up on the desk.

"Thanks." She let out a breath and held the phone a little closer to her ear. "I can't think of any one reason why I want to be a surgeon…But I can think of a thousand reasons why I should quit." She drew in another ragged breath and heard his breathing on the other end. He wasn't going to say anything. He was letting her gather her thoughts and get it all out. "They make it hard on purpose. There are lives in our hands. There comes a moment when it's more than just a game. And you either take that step forward or turn around and walk away. I could quit, but here's the thing…I love the playing field."

"Yeah." He knew that feeling well.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So, I made it through my first shift." She sat in her car staring at the hospital before her.

"You did." He confirmed quietly.

"We all did. The other interns are all good people." He could hear the tiredness dragging at her.

"They are." He confirmed again.

"You'd like them." She told him confidently.

"Angel," he laughed. "They're interns. I'd hate them."

"I'm an intern. You don't hate me." She pouted.

"True, but you're you. You're my best friend. You're not like the others." He pointed out sadly.

Alerted by something in his tone of voice she frowned. "Mark? What's wrong? You okay?"

"No. I did something stupid. It'll be okay though. Swear." He should have known that she'd pick up on his sadness over Derek sooner or later. He could never hide things from her either.

Meredith pulled out of the parking lot. "Mark? What'd you do?"

"I slept with someone I shouldn't have. No. That's not the mistake. I fell in love with someone I shouldn't have. I love her and I ruined her marriage and I really don't think she loves me." Once he'd started he couldn't stop himself from pouring out the whole story to her.

"Oh, Mark," she sighed her heart breaking for his pain. "I'm so sorry."

"I miss you. And I've lost my brother, my best friend because I fell for his wife. He left her and she's with me but she wants him back. She doesn't say it but I know it. And all I can think is that you're all the way across the country and I can't hop on a shuttle and come get a hug if I need one which I do." It was rare that Mark let anyone see the vulnerable side of his personality but he'd never had any qualms about showing it to Meredith. And she returned that favor to him. Separate they were broken but together they were happy and almost whole again.

"I wish you could. I miss you too."


	2. The First Cut is the Deepest

**Disclaimer: Nope. Don't own them. If I did then they wouldn't all be so messed up and stupid. **

**A/N: I wanted to keep everyone in character but it's not working out so well. I'd say I'm sorry but I'm really not. I like my version of the characters.**

**The First Cut is the Deepest**

"I think I'm gonna keep the house." Meredith told him while she stood in her living room looking at all the bareness of it. "But I need roommates."

"Ouch. That'll be fun. Oh, wait are you asking me? Cuz that's kind of a long commute for me, Angel."

"Shut up." She giggled. "No, I'm not asking you. I mean I would if you lived in Seattle but you don't so I'm not. I just…the house, it's part of my history. It's…Crap, I don't know what it is. But I need to get some roommates to make it work."

"If that's what you want, then you should do it, Angel." Besides if she had roommates then there would be someone there to make sure she got up in the morning and remembered to eat.

"I think it is. Yeah. It is. Besides, how hard can having roommates be? It's not like I'm home enough to care that they're there, right?" She sounded more like she was trying to convince herself than him.

"Mmhm. Have fun, Angel. Interns like you? Then you'd all be working crazy hours and never see each other." It sounded like a good plan to him. Besides then she'd have friends other than him and he wouldn't have to worry about her so much.

"No!" She objected immediately. "Not people I work with. We already see each other way too much. I'm going to find some nice normal nurses or orderlies or anyone that isn't a surgical intern."

"Yeah, good luck with that." She was so going to cave. Really. She was going to end up with George, Izzie and Cristina living with her and she was going to love every second of it.

"Shut up." She knew exactly what he was thinking and she hoped like Hell that she could just this once prove him wrong.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Crap. I kissed him. I drew the line and then I kissed him. What is wrong with me? Seriously! And we were talking about the ferryboats and lines and markers and it was cute and he was charming and I kissed him. Why did I kiss him?" She was rambling again and he found it adorable. He always had.

His warm laugh filled her ear again. He always made her feel better. "You're horny, Angel. And you like him. He sounds like an okay guy. Not good enough for you but then no one is. You're something special."

"Seriously! Mark," she whined. "I'm going to be in so much trouble when this gets out because it will. This place is like high school without the whole curfew and parental control thing. And he's my boss's boss. Crap! I'm screwed. Screwed to the power of screwed even."

"Angel." He was barely keeping himself from laughing at her and she knew it. "You like him. You should go for it. You only live once and life's too short to be miserable when you don't have to be. Give him a chance. Maybe it'll be great. Maybe it won't. Either way I'm here."

"I know." She drew in a breath and tried to calm down. "I know you're there for me and I know you always will be. I just…I don't want to be miserable. And I know that he might be so great but what happens when it's over? Or what happens if I say yes and then everyone else finds out and they make my life Hell?"

"Angel, there is no way to tell if it'll ever be over." Mark looked up at the knock on his door and grinned when Addie poked her head in, he waved a hand to motion her in. "You just have to take some things on faith. I think he'll be good for you. If worst comes to worst then I'll help you pick up the pieces again. As for the others making your life Hell? Fuck 'em. You don't need to care about what they think. Just do your job to the best of your abilities and the attendings and residents will see and reward you for it."

"I'll think about it, but that's all I'm willing to promise." She told him. "Gotta run. Love ya, Mark."

"You too, Angel." Mark replied and hung up.

"The infamous Mark Sloan giving dating advice?" Addie laughed at him.

Mark shrugged. "She's not the first and I dare say she won't be the last," he grinned. "Ready for lunch then?"

Addison nodded and held out her hand for his.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"She has my shoes. And she bit off his penis. And she has my shoes, Mark." Meredith rambled in a slightly panicky voice.

"Whoa. What? Hang on a second, Angel." She heard him giving muffled orders in the background as she paced the small supply closet she'd taken refuge in. "Now, tell me again and start from the beginning."

"Rape victim. Well not. Attempted. She kicked his ass. And bit off his penis but she's hurt really bad. And she's wearing the same shoes I was today." She couldn't quite catch her breath but it was okay because Mark was talking. Mark's voice was calm, soothing. Suddenly she could breathe again.

"Well, um, that's good? She kicked his ass anyway. She fought and she'll survive. Cuz she's a fighter. The shoes? Freaky but coincidence." He told her seriously.

"I know. It just threw me. And he said she fought him off and Burke called her a warrior and then pulled the attacker's penis out and they didn't know what it was and I did and they all freaked out some. It was kinda funny." She snickered a little at the memory of Burke nearly throwing the penis into the basin.

"I'll bet." He snickered too.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You're carrying around a penis? Like all day? Really?" She could hear the laughter in his voice.

"Yes Mark," she told him exasperated and a bit amused. "All day. I get to carry a penis in a cooler with me."

"Dream come true for you." He teased her unreservedly.

"Manwhore." She teased back.

"You love me anyway." He grinned and knew she could hear it in his voice.

"Cuz I'm stupid." She sighed in a mock put upon tone.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Question for you: Baby with a murmur. Face turned blue and then cleared up. Run tests? Or do you think it's a benign systolic ejection murmur?" Meredith whispered into the phone as she walked down a corridor to go check on Allison.

"It's probably benign but I'd do the tests anyway, just to be sure." He answered her promptly.

"Thank you! Seriously! That's what I said." She cheered.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"We got him! We got him, Mark! I was right there. He came to the hospital and it was him and we got him!" She was whisper yelling down the speaker of her phone and doing a shimmy in joy.

"That's great, Angel. Cops come yet? And how's the baby? And the girl?" He grinned in reflected excitement.

"No. Don't know, Burke refuses to go over anyone's head and she's still in a coma." Her voice was at a normal tone now and her breathing had calmed.

"So you're day is just sucking then. Mine too." He sighed as the confusion weighed him down again. The confusion, the hope, the terror and a host of other emotions filling him.

"Yeah. But we got him so that's good anyway and I wish I could make it better for you. She still love her husband?" She asked timidly. She didn't want to hurt him but he had brought up the subject.

"Mmm," he hummed noncommittally. "She's pregnant. I never thought I wanted kids but I do. And she doesn't. Because it's not his." She could hear the irritation and sorrow heavy in his tone.

"That's awful. She gonna keep it anyway? She should have it and give it to you. You'd be a great dad." She tried to offer him some kind of comfort. She knew she wasn't very good at the whole comforting thing but she gave it her best shot.

"I hope so. She's thinking about it." His voice seemed a bit happier at the end and she hoped she'd helped him out. She had a lot of helping to do if she was ever going to catch up.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So my day, night, whatever is looking up. Burke took over the baby's case and we're running tests." She told him happily.

"Good. That's great, Angel. Now I feel better." He sighed in relief. He needed some good news today. He had the worst feeling that Addison was going to abort their child.

"Doesn't your day, night, whatever still suck? Did she decide to keep it?" She really hoped she had. Mark would make a wonderful daddy.

Mark let out another heavy sigh. "Still deciding. But you're happy so I'm happy." He grinned again and hoped she could hear it over the phone.

"She'll keep it. It'll be okay and if she doesn't I can come kick her ass for you." She offered.

For the first time in hours and numerous phone calls he laughed a genuine heartfelt laugh. "Thanks. I'll hold you to that."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I got to hold the clamp on the baby's surgery. And I'm letting George and Izzie move in. Cristina says the babies are making me toxic and pink and squishy." She let out a soft giggle.

His husky laugh rolled over her again. "They are. But that's not a bad thing. George with the crush and the model Izzie then? Should be fun for you and congrats on the surgery."

"Thanks, Marky. You sound like hell. Go to bed." She frowned at the speaker. Suddenly she hated Addie for doing this to him. Addie should see what a great guy Mark is and love him. It just wasn't fair.

"You too, Angel. Love you." He told her tiredly.

"Yeah. Love you too." She smiled and sent him a mental hug.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You just called me like twenty minutes ago, Angel." He laughed as he pulled his car out of the parking lot.

"Yeah. I know. But I took the stairs. I know you said to go for it but some lines are way too dangerous to cross. Some lines are really there for a reason, you know?" She asked him in her rambling way.

She heard him sigh over the line and felt a pang of sorrow for him. "Yeah. Yeah I do. Get some sleep, Angel."

"I will. Soon as I get home. Still gotta drive there though. You okay?" She knew he wasn't but she had to ask.

"I will be. Just the waiting and the wondering. I know she loves him and not me but I wish she'd pick me and the baby. I really want her too. I want to be that guy. The one who stays. I want to be a dad. I want it like I've never wanted anything…well, except you." He stopped at a red light and rubbed a hand across his eyes.

"You don't want me like that. You want me to be your friend and confidant. Not your everything. And I want the same from you so we're square." She wondered briefly if it mattered that sometimes, just sometimes, deep in the night when the dark was all encompassing and the loneliness pressed in on her and she wanted him to be her everything. She would never, could never tell him that. But sometimes the ache for him filled her to bursting and he was all she could think or dream about.

"Yeah. Yeah I know." He answered dully. He wondered if he would ever be able to tell her that sometimes, just sometimes at the end of a long day it was her he wanted to see. That it was her that filled his every waking and sleeping thought. He didn't think he'd ever be able to say the words. But sometimes he imagined the future and saw only her.


	3. Winning a Battle, Losing the War

**Disclaimer: Still not mine. Really. I promise.**

**Winning a Battle, Losing the War**

"Why didn't you tell me that having roommates was such a bad idea? Seriously! They're making me crazy." Meredith whined over the phone as soon as Mark picked up. Hello's were so overrated anyway.

"Hang on a sec. Let go, Addie. I gotta take this." His sleepy, husky morning voice filled her senses.

"No. No. Go back to her," Meredith objected. "I shouldn't have called this early. I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking." A blush suffused her cheeks and for once she was glad he couldn't actually see her over the phone.

"Really, Angel, it's fine. Addie knows about you. She knows you're my best friend and that I'd die for you." He chuckled.

"You told her about me? Really? And she's okay with it?" Meredith queried, disbelieving.

"Yeah. Addie's a great person. You'd like her." There were muffled words and then a bed creaking. "She says hey by the way and call anytime. So what's up with the roomies? Tell Marky all about it."

She rolled her eyes at him. "They're fighting over who has the biggest room and I don't get a second of privacy and…I've never lived with anyone but my mom and one roommate in college and you know how Sadie turned out." She groaned.

"It'll work out, Angel. Really. So where are you? Cuz you're echoing kinda weirdly." He shook his head at her theatrics.

"I'm hiding in the bathroom." She told him bluntly.

Mark burst into laughter. "You would, Angel. Get out of the bathroom and deal with the roomies. It's your house, Mer." He ordered.

She nodded firmly. "Right. My house. My rules. Call me later."

"Always."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Can't talk. Dead Baby Bike race." She told him in a rush.

"Then why answer?"

"Cuz it's you." She answered as though it should be obvious. "Look gotta go. Cristina's creaming her scrubs, Alex is doing a macho stupid strut and Izzie's freaking. Love ya."

"Later, Angel. Call me when you're done." He grinned at the obvious eagerness in her voice.

"Of course."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Crap!" She cried out when he'd answered the phone.

"You realize you're starting these phone calls with that word a lot lately, don't you?" He chuckled.

"Shut up! I'm having major drama here! He saw a patient kiss me! He saw and crap! He saw it." She rambled at him.

Helpless laughter floated from the phone she was seriously considering hanging up. "Kissing patients, Grey? Really? Not smart."

"I didn't kiss him. I stitched him up and told him he needed tests and then he signed out AMA and surprised me on his way out the door." She explained hurriedly. She knew Mark didn't really care that a patient had kissed her and that it was against the rules. Mark figured people made rules to give other people something to strive for. Besides, Viper wasn't technically a patient when he'd kissed her.

"So how was it?" He asked her curiously. "As good as me?"

"Shut up!" She scowled and hung up the phone.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"If you were brain dead would you want the allotted six hours no matter what?" Hellos really did seem to be a thing of the past.

"Um, yes." He answered the question even though it confused the Hell out of him.

"Fine. Fine. Good. Me too. Thanks." She nodded as though she'd expected that answer from him.

"Do I want to know?" He wondered aloud.

"Probably not." She told him and hung up.

"Okay." He said slowly to the empty air on the other end of the phone and then shook his head with a smile. His Angel was hilarious sometimes and so very random.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Are you going to donate your organs?" She asked him this time.

"You're in a weird mood today, Angel." He commented with another grin at her randomness.

"Answer the question, Mark! If you were brain dead and a John Doe would you want us to keep you alive while we find your family so they can sign off on organ donation?" She pressed him in irritation.

"Um…probably. To at least find you or Addie or someone who could make that call. And yes, I'm an organ donor. Won't need them when I'm gone will I? Just make sure they don't take my junk." He lightened the mood with a joke.

Her unrestrained giggling answered him. "You wouldn't want your junk to live on after you? Think of all the future women it could pleasure."

"Not without me attached to it. No one can use it like I can." He boasted.

"God, you're vain." She laughed.

"Yes. But truthful too." He pointed out.

"Yeah." She remembered vividly exactly how good he was but she wasn't about to say that. His head was already big enough.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Alex is an ass. I really don't like him." She complained.

"Really?" He sat back in his chair and grinned a bit. His Angel really was in rare form today.

"Yes." She nodded adamantly. "He's a jerk and an ass and a surgery whore."

"Well, tell me what you really think of him." He teased her.

"He stole Cristina and Izzie's patient and scrubbed in on an aortic repair. Ass." She groused.

"So why are you mad? It wasn't your patient." He pointed out bluntly.

"True. Still. He's a jerk." She fumed.

"Yes, Angel, he's an ass. He thought of it before you could." He rolled his eyes and grinned even wider.

"Mark? You're an ass too. And a manwhore and I'm so going to smack you the next time I see you." She swore at him in a promise.

"I know." He laughed at her. "You know if you actually hit me every time you promised to I'd be nothing but a walking bruise?"

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I have the roomies from Hell. They're unpacking Mom's stuff and ordering Chinese and putting beer bottles on the furniture! They're taking over my house. Izzie's upset and she nests when she's upset! I'm upset but I can't do what I want." She ranted and he could nearly hear her frothing at the mouth.

"Calm down, Angel. Breathe. In and out." He told her in what he hoped was a calming voice. He was fairly sure she could hear the suppressed laughter though.

"Don't tell me to breathe dammit. I don't want to breathe. I want to rant and yell and drink and sleep with inappropriate men. And he saw me getting kissed and then slamming Alex against the lockers for gloating and, and, and CRAP!" She yelled and he heard something slamming loudly.

"Okay Angel. Okay. Yell yourself hoarse. I can take it." He leaned back against his headboard and settled in to wait her out.

"I don't want to yell at you. I like you. You're my friend and I miss you and I want you to hug me and you can't because you're so far away and I miss you. I just miss you." He could hear the floomp of the bed as she flopped down on it and sniffled.

"Don't cry, Angel. Really. Please. I hate it when you cry." He begged as he panicked just a little.

"I'm not crying," she sniffled. "I just. God I hate Chinese food."

"So order yourself some pizza or Thai. You like Thai and pizza. And then put in one of your old Alfred Hitchcock movies and I'll do the same and it'll be like we're watching it together." He offered desperately, willing to do almost anything so that she wouldn't cry. His Angel in tears had always seemed to be a crime against nature.

"You're brilliant." Her sniffles stopped and her tone brightened considerably.

"I know." He gloated. "Now dry your eyes, hang up, order the food, put in the movie and call me back."

"Okay."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Me and Cristina are going to be lesbians." The randomness had returned.

"Hot." He commented at the thought of Meredith and Cristina together and naked. He was so glad his Angel had sent him pictures of her friends. It really helped with the imagination.

"Because Alex wanted to see our boobs." She continued perfunctorily. She knew what he'd been thinking and that Alex had probably envisioned the same thing.

"Tell Karev to piss off." Mark snarled.

"Okay." She loosed one of her delighted giggles.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So my patient that kissed me?" She asked in a blandish tone that gave nothing away.

"I remember. Lucky guy." He said slowly as though testing the water of her mood.

"Not so lucky. Told him to have some tests to check for interior bleeding and he didn't and he came back and I got to sit on top of him and hold the wound together while we rushed him to surgery. Idiot." He could now hear the glee in her voice at being proved right about Viper.

"He make it?" He asked even though he knew the answer. If Viper had died she wouldn't be all bouncy and happy about being right. She'd be at best quiet and at worst angry.

"Yeah, course he did." She rolled her eyes because she knew that he'd already figured that out. "But the other guy. The one that Alex stole? He didn't but we knew that he wouldn't. Thing is thought that Bailey freaked. Yelled at Viper's friends for being stupid."

"Good for her." Mark nodded. He'd always thought the Dead Baby Bike Race was a stupid thing for the idiots of Seattle to do.

"Yeah. Crap. Company. Call you back later. Love you." She snapped her phone shut and stared at Derek as he closed the door to the locker room.

"Bye, Angel. Love you too." He told the dial tone with a sigh.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"That was fast." He answered the phone only minutes later.

"I'm weak. Weak and stupid and I know I'm going to tell him yes eventually. Mark. Tell me it's a bad idea. Seriously. Please? Because I want him and I can't have him and it's wrong on so many levels and…and…" She stopped and drew in a deep breath. "Please tell me what an inconceivably bad idea going out with him would be."

"Do you think he'll make you happy?" He asked instead. "Truthfully Mer. Pretend you're just a girl and he's just a guy. Will he make you happy?" With all the crap happening in his own life he really needed her to just be happy. If she could be happy then there was hope for him too.

"Maybe." She said hesitantly while thinking to herself that no one could ever make her as happy as Mark always had simply by being the voice on the other end of the phone like. "Yeah, I think he might. He's funny and sweet and fun and cute and smart and…yeah. He's McDreamy."

"Then say yes." He urged her with a note of desperation in his voice.

"I'll think about it." She promised as she pondered his strange need for her to go out with Derek.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You sounded off today. So I thought I'd call and you, me, Cristina, George and Izzie could watch my mom do a facial skin graft. You know the one where she takes the guy's whole face off." She offered in an attempt at comforting him for something he wasn't telling her and that he was trying to hide. She knew he'd tell her eventually and until he was ready then she'd just be as supportive as she could.

"Sounds good to me, Angel. Eat a piece of pizza for me. Or take a bite of the Chinese or something." He nearly ordered her with a tinge of relief in his voice.

"You okay?" She asked him concerned even more by the relief in his voice.

"No. But for tonight I'll pretend to be and then I'll tell you about it tomorrow. Deal?" He begged her.

"You sure?" She pressed more than okay with abandoning her friends to be a figurative shoulder for him.

"Yeah. I just want to hear your voice and your giggle and your enjoyment with your friends." He weedled. He really didn't want to go into the fucked up mess that had become his life tonight. He just needed a little time to process.

"Okay. But tomorrow I'll call you every five minutes until you tell me what's wrong?" She bargained and hoped that would be enough time for him to gather his thoughts and be ready to tell her. She didn't think she could handle the waiting.

"Deal." He agreed easily.

"All right. I'm putting you on speaker now." She set the phone down on the coffee table and settled on to the couch. "Everyone, Mark. Mark, this is Izzie, Cristina and George."


	4. No Man's Land

**Disclaimer: Nope they still aren't mine. Sorry if you wanted them to be. I know I do.**

**No Man's Land**

"You okay?" She asked him a few days later as she drove into work.

"Yeah." He answered listlessly.

"Good. That's good. Really though?" She pressed him.

"Are you calling to check up on me?" He asked slightly surprised. He knew he shouldn't have been but for some reason he was.

"Yes." She admitted without shame.

"Oh. That's…that's different. And thanks." He smiled sadly.

"Of course. You know…I'm sorry. I'm sorry she did that to you and I'm sorry I can't be there." She frowned at her own inability to comfort her greatest friend when he needed it. She really wished she'd taken that internship in New York now instead of wanting to be close to her mother.

"I know." She heard his ragged indrawn breath. "So give me some drama from the Emerald City cuz I need something to take my mind off of this."

"Of course." She groaned and hit the speaker button now that they were done with the private part of the conversation. "The one time you need it and I don't have any to give. Well, not much anyway."

"I'll take anything." He said.

"Izzie walked in on George in the shower this morning. In her underwear. Then she came down for coffee and she wears red 'Hello Kitty' panties." Meredith told him while Izzie and George both howled in indignation.

He gave a watery halfhearted chuckle. "If that's all you got, I guess it'll have to do."

"It is. Sorry. I'll call you as soon as I get any drama to entertain you with."

"Or we will," Izzie offered.

"Angel, take McDreamy and do him in a supply closet or something and then call me."

"Mark!" All three protested vehemently.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Did you do him then?" He asked in place of a hello.

She laughed. "No. But George wants me to make rules for the amount of clothing that can be worn in the house. And he did corner me and ask what I ate for breakfast."

"Optional." He told her after a bit of thought. "Or make a rule where you all go naked. And what did you eat for breakfast? Did you even eat or did you forget again."

"I'll suggest that. I'm sure Izzie won't mind. I had breakfast thank you very much." She heard his scoff and stuck her tongue out at the phone. "I had leftover grilled cheese, Mark."

"Such a healthy breakfast," he said sadly. "I swear the wind is going to blow you away one day. At least run by the cafeteria after rounds and have some yogurt or something."

Meredith sighed and rolled her eyes. "Yes, mother."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I've got you a bit of real drama if you're interested." She didn't give him a chance to respond. "You're going to love this one! Guy accidentally shot himself in the head with a nail gun and lived through it. And he's conscious."

"Sweet." Mark's eyes widened. That was a really rare case his Angel had caught.

"I know right?" She enthused. "He was holding the gun and tripped down some stairs. Missed any major blood vessels. Only affected the optic nerve and he has numbness on his right side."

"You get to scrub in?" He asked in interest. This was far more interesting than the damn rhinoplasty that he was already late for.

"Yep. Gotta get a history from the wife and then I get to scrub in." He could just see the beaming smile on her face. God he missed her.

"Awesome, Angel." He breathed out.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"He's being an ass." She pouted to him.

"Karev?" He asked her confused. It was usually Karev after all.

"No, well yes, he's always an ass. But not him today." She ranted.

"The attending? What's he done? And why won't you tell me his name?" He frowned in consternation. He really wanted to talk to McDreamy. Somebody needed to make him aware of the facets of Meredith Grey or he'd end up hurting her without understanding why it was hurting her.

"Yes, him. I won't tell you because you're overprotective and annoying and bossy and arrogant and you'll come and beat him up or something. And he's an ass because he's not listening to me. Nail guy tripped but he's been having headaches and dizzy spells for a few months and he won't listen to me and check for a tumor or other medical cause of the headaches and other symptoms!"

"He's an ass, Angel." Mark agreed quickly. "I won't beat him up if you tell me his name. I promise."

She could hear the utter insincerity in his voice and grinned at his protectiveness. "No. He's McDreamy and that's the only name I'm giving you though right now he's McAss so I guess that's two names."

"Of course." He answered with a put upon sigh. "You are so mean to me."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"He's ordering the tests at least. Wants the patient to stabilize overnight first though." She told him in a disconsolate tone.

"That's good?" He hoped it was.

"I guess." She shrugged. "My mom's scrub nurse is here. Pancreatic cancer. Should I tell her about mom you think?"

Ah, he thought, now we get to the real point of the call. "That's up to you, Angel. You should go see her though. Visit and stuff. It's polite and kind and you're a kind, compassionate person. So definitely go see her and then let things happen how they happen. If you want to tell her then tell her."

"Yeah. I'll call you after." She promised in that same sad voice.

"You'd better," he half threatened.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Okay. So I lied to her. Told her mom was traveling like I tell everyone. And I don't think she believed me." Meredith told him in a voice that was only slightly less sad than it had been earlier.

"You're a terrible liar." He grinned. She'd never been able to lie to him.

"I can lie to people. Just not you. Or apparently my mother's scrub nurse." She sighed in mock despair.

"I know you too well and she's knows your mom too well." He offered her an excuse. He knew that she couldn't lie to anyone with any success and she knew it too.

"Yeah. I'm off so I'm gonna go see mom. Call me in the morning?" She asked him softly.

"Yeah. Miss you Angel." She would never know exactly how much he missed her.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"She remembers her scrub nurse and doesn't remember me. My own mother doesn't remember me at all." Meredith bit at her lip to keep the sobs inside. She shouldn't let it hurt her this much. Her mother barely remembered her before the Alzheimer's why should she be hurt that she was still forgotten?

"Ah Hell, Angel." Mark closed his eyes in shared grief and pain. There were days when he really hated Ellis Grey. "I'm sorry. I'd remember you. I know it's not much but I'd always remember you. If I had Alzheimer's, I'd remember you. Might not know you but I'd remember you." He hoped the levity he forced into his voice brought her spirits up.

"It's enough, Marky. Of course it's enough." She scrubbed the tears from her eyes and pulled out of the nursing home's parking lot. She just needed to remember that there were people who loved her.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Tell George you've bought tampons!" Meredith's voice shouted at him faintly.

"Mer?" Mark sat up and rubbed at his eyes to try and wake up some.

"Uh…er, no. George." A male voice that he barely remembered hearing before sounded over the speaker in uncertain tones.

"Okay. What the Hell?" He blinked in confusion.

"Men don't buy tampons!" George suddenly shouted loudly.

Mark held the phone away from his ear for a moment and scowled. This was so not going to be a good day. "Then I must have ovaries and boobs." He said scathingly. "Yes, I've bought tampons, George."

"For your sister, right? Or your mom?" George's voice was desperate in its need to assert masculinity. Mark found it rather funny after a bit of thought. Poor delusional George.

"Don't have a sister. I've bought them for my best friend's sisters, for Mer and for a few other women. It's no big deal, George. Women like men who are secure enough in their masculinity to do that kind of thing. They think it's sexy. Put Mer back on now." He ordered knowing that George would continue to believe whatever he wanted about the act of buying something so normal.

"Fine!" George said angrily. "Mer, you're gay boyfriend wants you back."

"He's not gay!" Meredith cried and Mark heard the sound of flesh on flesh which meant that Meredith had smacked George.

"You're more upset by that comment than I am." Mark laughed. "I know I'm not gay. And if George wants to think I am then more power to him. I'll just woo his women away and let him stew in his insecurity."

"Good plan. Gotta go. Need to hit the store before work because George is an insecure little girl who is too embarrassed to buy his female roommates tampons." She still sounded a bit furious and Mark smiled. He really preferred angry Angel to depressed anyway.

"Bye Angel." He told her brightly.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I was right. I hate that I was right. I hate being right. Really. Seriously. I hate it. If we remove the tumor he's got 8-10 years with the possibility that he won't remember himself. If we don't then he's only got 3-5. Why did I have to be right?" She rambled in a slightly panicky voice.

"Because it happens. And it happens to people who don't deserve it. It happens to people who don't need their lives torn apart. But we're not gods and we can't pick and choose who gets well and who doesn't." He tried to calm her down and reassure her at the same time.

"I know." She sighed. "I still hate it though."

"Me too." He told her.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I told her. Liz I mean. About Mom. Liz is dying. She came here to die. And I don't know how much longer I can hold out with the mommy thing. I'm drowning here Mark. I can't…she doesn't even remember that she has a daughter." Mark frowned. It seemed that Meredith's dark and twisties were acting up again. Dammit. He needed to be there or at least tell McDreamy how to deal with the dark and twisties.

"I'm here. I know. Well I don't know really. But I know you and you'll make it through. You'll be all right. And I'm here when you aren't." He soothed her while wishing he could just take her in his arms and hold her until the darkness let up. Then they'd go do something crazy and she'd feel better.

"Thanks." Meredith sighed and then chuckled a bit. "Liz called mom a bitch."

She let Mark's chuckle warm her cold places. "I think I'd like her. Your mom is a bitch, Angel. She shouldn't have expected you to do all this alone." He kept his voice soft and soothing even as he raged inside at Ellis Grey's uncaring attitude for her daughter.

"Yeah." She smiled a bit sadly but it was still a smile. She really wished he were here or she was there.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"They're going to have the surgery. It's a bad idea. She doesn't know what she's doing. She says she doesn't care that it could mean ten bad years for her." She felt so bad for Sona and Jorge. They were so in love.

"Maybe she does know." Mark offered softly. "Maybe she really doesn't care." He knew he wouldn't. He'd rather Meredith be alive in the world and not know him anymore than be six feet under.

"But him not knowing her. It's horrible, Mark and it hurts and I feel like I can't breathe and it never goes away." She tried to draw in a breath but they came short and gasping.

"Tell me something, Angel. If it were me—" Mark started.

"It's not. It won't be!" She nearly screamed. That was one thing she couldn't contemplate. Ever.

"Shh." He soothed. "Just think. Just pretend. If it were me or even McDreamy would you take the five or the ten?"

"I don't…I can't…the ten. I wouldn't care. It'd be the ten. I don't care if you remember me. I…I'd just be glad that you were still there in the world…but I'd miss you so much and I'd hurt every day. But I'd hurt even worse without you." Derek never even entered her thoughts on this subject. When she realized later she didn't even feel guilty. Derek had been one night of passion and he was a possible future. Mark was five years of friendship and love and caring and affection.

"I know." He whispered.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I met him for breakfast." She confessed quietly. She had decided to give him a chance. She had decided to find out if he'd be the ten year person. She really hoped he was.

"Good." He sounded relieved and happy for her. He would never tell her that she was breaking his heart over and over again. He could barely acknowledge that to himself.

"Yeah." She would never tell him that she was breaking her own heart just a little. She wished Mark could give her the forever Derek was possibly offering her.


	5. Shake Your Groove Thing

**Disclaimer: They aren't mine. Dammit.**

**Shake Your Groove Thing**

"I'm exhausted and they want me to get my mother to sign all of her finances over to me. Why do I have to do it? If she was in her right mind she'd never want me to be her power of attorney or whatever." Meredith whined in a croaky voice.

"She would…well, okay, probably not but there isn't anyone else that can. At the end of the day she only wants you." He tried to put the best spin on the situation as he could. He knew it didn't make much difference but he was more than willing to try.

"Didn't make a bit of difference when I wanted her, did it?" She drew in a shaky breath after she snapped at him. "Sorry. Sorry. I'm just…tired." She rubbed at her eyes and rested her head on the steering wheel.

"And sick." He observed. "Go to bed. Call in sick and get some sleep." She was going to make a mistake soon if she didn't get some rest.

"I can't. I'm holding a heart today. I can't pass it up." She didn't sound as enthused about the prospect as she normally would and it made him frown but he knew he wouldn't be able to talk her out of it.

"Angel…okay." He exhaled heavily. "Deal with your mom later. Hold a heart today, then get some sleep and deal with your mom tomorrow."

"Yeah." She nodded against the steering wheel. "Sounds like a plan."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I should have called in sick. I should have listened to you." Her voice was hushed and filled with dread.

"You should always listen to me." He teased. "What happened?" He asked her seriously when her breathing began to speed up.

"I think I did something to the heart. I fell asleep and my fingernail popped a glove and I think I squeezed it too hard." She confessed even more quietly and the dread had turned to terror.

"Did her heart restart?" He asked with a feeling of dread himself.

"It took a bit but yeah." She nodded and her breathing calmed a bit.

"Then it should be fine." He nearly sighed in relief. "If you'd done something to the heart you would have known immediately. Sometimes a heart takes a bit to restart."

"That's what George said too. I should tell Burke, though. Right? George says not too but I should." She rambled.

"Yep. You should. In private. He'll tell you it's fine." He couldn't stop the tiny feeling of hurt that she'd told someone else before she'd told him but he hid it as best he could.

"Okay. I'll tell him." She nodded firmly. "Soon." He couldn't stop the spurt of pride just like he couldn't have stopped the hurt. She listened to his advice first.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"A towel? Really? A towel?" He asked her astonished.

"Yeah. That poor woman." Meredith's voice was filled with sympathy for the woman with a towel stuck in her chest for five years. It must have been so very painful every day.

"That's…that's…damn." Mark shook his head, for once completely lost for words. "I don't even know what to say to that. Five years with a towel inside her chest." He was in awe at the carelessness of one of his fellow surgeons and the strength of the woman who had lived with it.

"A popped glove doesn't feel so bad now." She told him timidly. "It doesn't feel great but like you and George said the heart restarted. And I haven't told him yet so don't bother asking. I haven't been able to get him alone."

He frowned. She should have told him already. Was she really that afraid of getting cut from the program? "You will though. You always do the right thing in the end." He knew she would eventually tell Burke what she'd done and knowing Meredith she'd confess at the worst possible moment.

"Yeah." She agreed. "Damn. Gotta go. McDreamy's heading my way." She sounded disgruntled.

His laugh lit up her face again. "Go. Have fun. Love you."

"Love you too." She sighed heavily and snapped the phone closed.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Crap! I told him. Crap! It was totally the wrong time too. In front of her husband. Crap!"

She had started the conversation with her trademark 'crap' again. It must be bad. "You don't know that you did it." He tried to reassure her.

"I didn't." She told him. "Her ventricular walls are weak. It had nothing to do with me…we think. But now I have to go before the Chief and legal."

He frowned and sighed. His Angel really was in trouble this time. "That sucks." Legal was never easy. They liked to make things difficult for the doctors.

"Yeah." She sighed too. She knew there wasn't much she could do about it. She'd just have to hope they didn't cut her from the program.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Question for you. I asked this one to McDreamy first but he didn't answer me so it's your turn. When did we become adults and how do we make it stop?" She asked him in a defeated tone.

This day was just getting worse and worse. Her life was sucking and his wasn't going much better. "You don't settle for the easy ones do you?" He rolled his eyes.

"Have I ever?" She asked wryly.

"Point. And I don't know when we became adults…sometime around our first time of watching one of our patients die or something…I think and we can't stop it. We just have to do the best we can with what we have." He didn't really know how to answer that question. It was a tough one and one he'd been wondering more and more himself lately.

"Good to know. Sucks though." She sighed.

"Wouldn't be life if it didn't."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"New question: What would losing a hundred pounds in a short amount of time do to a person's heart?" She asked him in the most upbeat tone she'd used all day which wasn't saying much as it still wasn't anywhere near her normal tone.

"How fast are we talking? In less than a year?" He wondered aloud.

"Think so." He could hear the nod of her head.

"It would thin the walls of the heart for a bit until they could repair themselves…I think. Angel I do plastics not cardio." He hated admitting to not knowing something but in this case he really wasn't all that sure.

"I know that but you still know more than I do." Her bright grin transferred across the phone lines in her voice. "For now. Thanks Mark."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So a party at Angel's house? Why was I not invited?" Hellos seemed to be gone for him as well. He shook his head at his own random thought.

"What?" She exclaimed. "It's not a party. It's not. Izzie's boyfriend flew in and she wants him to meet us. That's all. Not a party party just a small group." God please don't let Izzie have made this more than just a small dinner party type thing.

"Not what I heard." Mark allowed himself to laugh at her complete obliviousness.

"How did you hear anyway?" She whined.

"Izzie jacked your phone and asked me what kind of drinks you like. I think she's hoping to get you so drunk you forget to yell at her for going overboard." He gave Izzie up without regret. She really should have asked first and besides Angel would forgive her easily enough.

"I should kill her. Dammit! I'm at the home to sign the papers and I'm late. I love you!" He heard the car door slam.

"Love you too, Angel. Call me later."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Mark. I'm gonna kill her. Really. The entire hospital is at my house. I should have gone to dinner with McDreamy." He found her aggravated tone adorable.

"Think you'll get conjugal visits from McDreamy cuz if he won't I will." He offered. "Or I can help you hide the body."

"Funny." She snarked. "I'm a doctor though. I'll make it look like an accident. She fell on a scalpel or something." She sighed heavily as she looked out her windshield at the crowd of people and cars in and around her house.

"Whatever works." He shrugged. "Don't drink too much tequila and don't sleep with inappropriate men, unless it's your McDreamy or me but I'm not there." He really hoped she found McDreamy and had sex with him, she needed a bit of stress relief. "I've got a peds nurse to see to so call me in the morning."

"I will." She assured him. "Have fun."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Izzie's boyfriend is very tall and very blond. And completely inapp…in…wrong. I didn't sleep with him though so it's all good. And you're busy banging a nurse so you didn't answer you're phone. What happened to Addie? Did you dump her for getting rid of the baby? I hope you did. That was a shitty thing to do to you. I think I hate her. No, I know I hate her. I hate her because she hurt you. No one gets to hurt you. No one. I love you. You're my best friend. You and Jose. Jose came first and he's more fun at the time but you're warmer and better in bed. I miss you. Wanna come to my party? Come to my party, Marky. I'm drunk and I'm horny and I wanna sleep with you cuz McDreamy isn't here and he's totally in…inap…wrong anyway. But you said I could have sex with him but he's not here and you aren't here and mommy was nuts tonight. I want you to come here. You or McDreamy. Don't care. Well, I do. Cuz McDreamy will give me forever and you'll give me tonight. So I'll take McDreamy. At least he's in the same city. Come to Seattle Marky."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Crap! Crap! And again CRAP! He showed up and we did it in his car and Bailey caught us. Crap! Dammit Mark! Stop fucking the stupid nurse and answer the fucking phone! I need you! I swear to God!"

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Calm now. Sorry. Crap though still. What am I gonna do? That had to be one of, if not the most, stupid thing I've ever done. I was right in front of my house. I could have taken him upstairs but I didn't. Dammit! Call me back and make me feel better…please. But don't leave your nurse hanging cuz of me, kay? Satisfy her and then call me. Love you."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Now you're not answering. Drunk dialing now, Angel? You're so in trouble. I love you. I miss you and I'd come to Seattle if I could. I can't though. Don't worry about Bailey. She'll get over it. Call me when you finish your meeting."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So the papers for mom are signed." She sounded almost too calm.

"Good." He said cautiously. There was something very off about how calm her voice was. "How's Bailey acting?"

"Don't know yet. I've been dealing with the mommy stuff and took the morning off. Except for the meeting with the chief. Burke saved my ass so…yeah. I'm good I think. A month of probation." The unnatural calmness began to make sense to him; she was still processing and chewing on everything. He closed his eyes in a long blink of relief. She'd be just fine.

"And McDreamy?" He asked hesitantly. She still hadn't shared any details of the tryst the night before. Unusual for either of them. They were both voyeurs when the occasion presented itself and were more than happy to graphically describe any encounter they'd had if the other asked. She hadn't asked about Addison though. Not a single time. And he hadn't really asked about McDreamy. He wondered if that was some kind of sign.

"I have no idea." She let out a half laugh that seemed much better to him than the almost dead calm of only moments ago. "But I want to try. Really. I deserve a happy ending right?"

"You do." He nodded even though he knew she couldn't see him. "You really do deserve the best, Angel."

She smiled a bit at him. "So the peds nurse?" She asked in an overly innocent tone. "What about Addie?"

"She never loved me. She loves her husband and she's going to find him and get him back. Nothing I can do about it. Don't know that I want to." He gave a philosophical shrug. "Addie and me…I guess we just weren't meant to be. I can accept that…I just wish things had been different."

"You'll find her, Marky. I promise. Someday you'll find your one." She hated that her life was starting to look up just as his took a nosedive into the swirling black mass of loneliness. It was the first time she could ever remember him being serious about someone and she had to go and break his heart and push him back into his manwhore ways.

"God I hope so." He sighed. He couldn't tell her that she was the only woman who had ever held his interest or his heart. Addie had been a mistake. They were friends and should have never tried to be more than that. They weren't suited for each other. They had both been lonely and they had allowed the loneliness to dictate to them. He would always love Addie but she wasn't the one. She was a friend, a good friend but still only a friend. His heart had always belonged solely to his Angel. Someday maybe she'd returned his all-consuming love but he wouldn't hold his breath for that.


	6. If Tomorrow Never Comes

**Disclaimer: Not mine. They belong to someone else. Someone who is now richer than Midas. Sucks to be me.**

**A/N: So for those of you that have been asking. Derek is not going to figure out who Mark is until after Mark moves to Seattle which will be a lot before he originally did. I hadn't really given the weirdness of Derek not having ever met Meredith any thought and so he just doesn't. And Meredith doesn't know who Derek is to Mark either. It was just more fun that way and sticks closer to canon. I'm not a Derek hater, by the way. I kind of like him, just like Mark better. He's not a bad guy in this story though he's going to be an ass for a while once he finds out about Mark. I'm actually thinking of having him end up with Lexie since I stole Mark for Meredith. What do you think? Anyway if you have any questions leave a review or PM me and I'll try to answer them.**

**On another vein: If we were to think of the main GA characters as a body what parts would they be? I'm meaning for this story (Mark doesn't die and the rest is up in the air. I haven't decided yet.). The only thing is that Mer is the heart. She's the one that keeps them all going. So I need body parts for: Alex, Cris, George, Iz and Mark. Please help me out?**

**If Tomorrow Never Comes**

"Why, Mark?" She whined in a breathless voice. "Why do you guys always do this? Men are a curse. He made me even later than I already was cuz he wanted to talk about us. I ran." He could hear her panted breaths and knew she was hurrying to try and not be as late as she already was.

"Just talk to the guy, Mer." Mark urged her. "Stopping running from him. So you're late and Bailey's after your ass. At least she's not firing you. It's nothing you can't handle. Face it, you lived through growing up with Ellis Grey as a mom. After that your skin is tougher than diamonds and you can put up with a bunch of crap. Stop avoiding him and give him a chance. Maybe you'll fall head over heels for him and get your happy ending. Take a risk. Live a little." He grinned at that. No one had ever accused Meredith Grey of not living her life.

Meredith snorted as she scrambled up the stairs. "You're one to talk, Sloan. You never give yourself a chance to develop feelings for anyone and when you do it's your best friend's wife." She winced slightly at her own waspishness. That hadn't come out quite the way she'd wanted it too.

"Ouch." He grumbled good naturedly.

Meredith smirked a bit. "I'd say I'm sorry and I am for hurting your feelings but still…you know what I mean."

He shook his head in exasperated fondness. "Yeah, yeah I do. But Mer, we don't choose who we fall in love with." He reminded her.

"I'm not in love with him." She protested. "Not yet. Could be. You really think I can do the whole relationship thing?" Suddenly she sounded so young and vulnerable. If he didn't know the capable, brilliant woman that she was he would swear that she was an insecure teenager again.

"Yes." He answered without any hesitation. "Without a doubt. You'll do it. You'll be great at it. Just have fun and go with the flow. Be happy. Please? For both of us." He didn't think he could bear it if they were both miserable this time. She was so very far away.

"You'll find your happiness, Marky." She told him with a confidence that he couldn't feel. "Really. I know you will. Even with your manwhore mask someone will come along that will make the sun shine for you. And now I have to go cuz I'm late and I'm here and I'm changed. Love you."

"I think she already came for me, Angel. Love you too." He told the dead air of the phone after she'd hung up. "And you're going to be with McDreamy. Why'd I let you go?"

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I'm going to end it with McDreamy. No good can come from sleeping with your boss." She announced in place of a hello this time.

"No!" He shouted. "Do not end it! Stop freaking out! You need to be happy for both of us. Please give it a chance." He scowled at the phone. Why did she have to keep freaking out about a relationship with McDreamy? "I haven't had a date in two weeks, Angel. I've gone home alone every night and been lonely. One of us needs to have some form of company of the opposite sex and it's not going to be me for the foreseeable future. Not anything long term anyway."

"Seriously?" She yelped. "You're pulling the emotional blackmail card? You?"

He grinned smugly at her incredulity. "Yes." He nodded firmly. "Yes I am. Really. Just do it for me, Angel."

She chose not to answer one way or the other on that issue. "We've got a patient with a sixty pound tumor, at least sixty."

"You're changing and avoiding the subject—Wait! Did you say sixty pounds?" Had she really said SIXTY pounds? How did a tumor get that large?

"Yep." She grinned at her successful distraction. "43-year-old woman who has been housebound for the past year. Tumor the size of an entire other person growing in her."

"Wow." He whistled in reluctant appreciation. "That's…big. Okay." He shook off his amazement and tried to force her back on topic. "Just give McDreamy a chance, Angel."

"I'll think about it." She promised for what was probably the millionth time. He'd have to accept her word because there was nothing he could do from nearly three thousand miles away.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I've thought about it and the answer's no." She said in a cutting voice. "Not happening again. It was stupid and unprofessional and it's going to get me blackballed. And I think I really do hate him." She huffed out a breath and waited for Mark to tell her that it would be fine and that she didn't hate Derek.

"You're overreacting." He soothed through his own amusement. Her pessimistic rambling was really funny sometimes. "The first few weeks will be Hell, yes. But just do your job and you'll be fine." He knew she was a very good surgeon and that her true calling would win out over any stupidity that the people in her life could throw at her.

"He's playing favorites already." She pouted.

"In what way?" He asked her in a reasonable tone.

"He pulled Izzie off a case and put me on it."

"Did he give a reason?" He had to have had some reason for it.

"He didn't exactly give a reason. She was presenting he asked her for treatment options and she didn't know. Well she did. But the patient only wanted to know the options for pain management not treatment for the disease and she had to check the book for the answer. I knew the answer without the book so I answered and now I'm on the case instead of her."

"There you go, then." He pointed out in that same reasonable tone. "That wasn't favoritism. That was picking the best. You're the best intern for this case because you knew the answer the patient wanted. Suck it up, Angel and go with it." He advised.

"You're so aggravating!" She fumed at him.

"Because I'm right." His tone had changed nearly instantly from reasonable and soothing to cocksure and smug.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I'm not calling to talk about McDreamy so shut it." She ordered in her bossy voice that never failed to make certain parts of his anatomy twitch and naughty thoughts of punishment fill his brain.

He shook the dirty thoughts off and concentrated on the conversation. "Okay. What are you calling for then? And I like talking about McDreamy with you. You get so mad and you're cute when you're mad. Very cute." He only said it to piss her off and get her to do that voice again. Maybe he needed to shake his head a bit harder to dislodge those thoughts.

"Seriously. Mark." She growled at him and that was another quirk of hers that he found unbearably hot. "I want to talk about my patient."

"If you insist." He murmured and tried to pay attention while his dick had other thoughts on the matter.

"His daughter wants me to convince him to go for the surgery that will treat his disease and not just his pain. How do I do that?"

"Hmm…that's an interesting question…I'll have to get back to you. I have surgery in ten minutes and I need to think about it." He knew he could have come up with a quick answer for her but right then his brain wasn't working and besides this way she'd think he was truly pondering her dilemma.

"Okay." He said in a brighter tone. "Thanks Mark."

"Anytime, Angel." Seriously anytime, just don't start conversations with me with that bossy tone or I won't make sense, he thought to himself after she'd hung up.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"This time we are talking about McAss. Or I'm talking about McAss since you're in surgery. He's an ass. Really. He pulled me off the case cuz I asked him a question about the procedure for the disease. He didn't even give me time to talk. Just told me not to scrub in. Ass. And this is the guy you want me to date and fall in love with. You're an ass too. Why do guys keep complicating my life? Seriously Marky. This sucks."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So we're back to McAss because he was being an ass and you're going to call the whole thing off?" He asked her in an attempt to keep her bossy voice and growls at bay. He had already been late to surgery once today.

"Yes." She said curtly.

"Angel…why do you sound so…?" His eyes widened in realization. "I'm on speaker aren't I? You're in the cafeteria with your other friends and I'm on speaker so they can all hear me right?" He sighed. She was actually mad today. He wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

"Yes." Her voice was still curt but he could detect a bit of amusement behind it. That was good. It meant that she wasn't nearly as angry at him as she was pretending to be.

"You're that mad at me?" He asked in his most wheedling lost tone. "Really? Me? Your beloved best buddy and friend and stuff Marky?" He thought about putting on a fake sob but decided that would be a bit too far, even for him.

"Yes." He could hear the smile she was fighting off now.

"Wanna say anything else?" He wondered.

"No." Now he knew the smile was twitching her lips.

"He's an ass, you're an ass. Every person with a penis is an ass," Cristina cut in. "McDreamy is a jerk and you want your baby sister or whatever strange relationship you two have to date him. You're an ass, Mark, accept it and move on."

One eyebrow lifted in surprise at her bitter tone. "Mmhmm. Right. Okay. I'm just gonna leave you ladies and George cuz I know he's there and Alex has probably horned in as well to your hate fest while I go make someone pretty."

"Don't you dare hang up, Mark!" Meredith shouted. "You get to sit there and listen to us bitch and whine because you wanted me to date McAss. Suck it up."

"Fine." He sighed heavily. The bossiness and the cute fury he could handle without a problem but the bitterness was rather off putting. He didn't even know Cristina and he already knew that they were going to be at loggerheads over Meredith in the future. "Anything for my Angel."

"I think I just threw up in my mouth a little," Cristina muttered and Mark smirked. Point to Sloan.

"I think it's cute." Izzie commented. "They're so sweet together. Much better than McAss even though I think he's kinda cool too."

"Iz, you think the best of everyone." The husky laughter rolled over the table of interns. "And I guess I'm lucky I don't work there. You'd all be bitching about me, except Mer who would defend me to the death."

"I'm not into plastic, Mark. I'd hate every second spent on your service. Especially because you use interns as personal slaves." She accused without any hint of remorse for the attempt to smack him down.

"I make no apology for it." He announced smugly.

"You're an ass then," George spoke up finally confirming that he was there as Mark knew he'd have to be. "But then they already said everyone with a penis is an ass so…yeah, shutting up."

"Smart move, Georgie." He told him to the laughter of the other interns.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Did he really just try to ask you out, Angel? Truly? Cuz that was so pathetic. I feel sorry for him. That was awful." Mark banged his head on his desk with a laugh of mixed embarrassment and hilarity.

"Yeah." Meredith gave her own embarrassed giggle. "I know. I don't want to hurt him or anything cuz George is sweet and kind and like a teddy bear. But he's just not…not attractive to me. I want to cuddle him in my arms and make all the bad things go away not screw him into the mattress." She blew a piece of hair out of her eyes and frowned. She really needed to figure out a way to nip this crush of George's in the bud.

"You need to tell him that, Mer. He's only going to get hurt if you let him continue with this." He didn't want George to be hurt either and he most likely would be at some point. Meredith would never be able to love him the way he wanted her too.

"Yeah, I know. Anyway…why'd you call?" She changed the subject from her admittedly crappy love life and roommate situation to something a bit more relevant.

"Your patient. Got an idea. Tell him what his daughter told you. Tell him the benefits and ask him if he's really willing to spend the rest of what little time he has making her sad." He knew it was devious and morally corrupt but it was also the only idea he had that had a one hundred percent success rate.

"Emotional blackmail." She sounded dubious and then sighed. "Right. I'm so gonna get fired."

"You'll manage it. And he'll thank you for it." He promised.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I managed it. Well, his daughter did. She just needed to have someone there with her so she could say what she needed to. He's going to have the surgery." Her voice was ecstatic and bouncy.

"Knew you could." He grinned at her enthusiasm.

"And now I get to scrub in." She nearly cheered. "And it's not favoring me because I got him to agree. Well, his daughter and I got him to agree."

"Good for you. Excellent." He settled back in his desk chair and grabbed the file for this afternoon's face lift. God, what he wouldn't give for a birth defect or a burn victim.

"I'm hyped and I'm not mad at you anymore." She told him in a confiding tone.

"Surgery whore." He accused with a chuckle.

"Yep." She agreed without shame.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"That was…so…great!" She breathed out. "Just so…awesome. I could do that all day. It was…Mark…I have no words."

"That's a first," he laughed at her. "You are so high. Bet the sex would be phenomenal right about now."

She giggled. "Probably but since you're not here and McDreamy had to go work on the tumor I guess we'll never know."

"Crap." He groaned in dismay.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"The tumor patient died." Her earlier high hadn't quite worn off.

"I'm sorry." He told her anyway.

"I know. But my patient will walk his daughter down the aisle in a month so the day turned out okay." He could hear the small, guilty smile in her voice.

"Yeah. I'm glad. That's good. So not completely high anymore then?" He asked in a sorrow filled voice.

"Nope." Her tone said differently though.

"Damn. Next time pull McDreamy into a closet or an on-call room and then give me the prurient details." He demanded.

Meredith just laughed.


	7. The Self-Destruct Button

**Disclaimer: Nope not mine. Why are you asking again?**

**The Self-Destruct Button**

"I think they know. Izzie and George. I think they know that McDreamy and I are a couple." She whispered to him.

He scowled and stood from the bed he'd been lying in. He couldn't even remember the girl's name. It didn't matter. He only felt empty now. "Good." He tried to keep his voice light even though he felt like the darkness was swallowing him whole. "You should have told them before. They're gonna make you pay for a few days now. If you'd just told them then they'd be okay with it."

"I don't want them to know." She frowned sadly. "They're going to be insufferable."

Mark headed for the hotel's small bathroom and rubbed at his eyes. "They'll be fine if you level with them. George will get over his crush and Izzie's bright and sparkly and happy anyway so she'll be happy for you. Especially if you tell them that you're falling for him." He turned on the water to splash some water on his face and hope it helped with his desolate mood.

"I'm not falling for him, Mark!" She protested hotly. "You are no help at all."

"You know you love me." He tried to infuse his normal cockiness and humor but feared he failed miserably.

"Doesn't mean you're helping me with this dilemma." She frowned and wondered silently why he sounded so off today.

"Unhunh." He murmured as the woman in the other room stirred. He pulled his boxers and pants on before scooping up the rest of his clothes. He slipped his feet into his shoes and snuck silently out the door. "You don't really want my help though, Angel. I'm as screwed up as you are and my advice sucks." He clicked his phone closed and pulled his shirt on in the hallway. He knew he shouldn't have hung up on her but he just couldn't deal with anything else before he got some coffee in his veins.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So Bailey still on you?" He said by way of an apology for his crappy mood earlier. "I miss you," he murmured lowly.

"Yes. Nothing I can't handle though. Izzie's pissed off about something. Told you she knows and she's being an absolute bitch about it. And George keeps sending me these pouting looks. He's getting very annoying and he's glaring at McDreamy all the time. And Cristina's sick. Alex is normal…for Alex though so…yeah. I really miss you too. How's your day going?" He sounded more like himself now.

He smiled slowly. Talking to his Angel usually helped him feel better and he was beyond sorry that he'd forgotten that this morning. "Good. Did a nose job and a boob job this morning. I think I'm becoming bored with my own specialty."

"Well, all you do anymore is preform unnecessary surgeries on already pretty women. You should branch out, do something else. Traumas are always fun." She pointed out happily.

"You don't know how much I want to. I would give just about anything for a burn victim or a disfigurement. I'd even do it pro bono for the thrill." He whined.

"Your life is such a drag, Marky." She giggled happily. She was overjoyed that he was back to normal. Her pager beeped and she nearly jumped. "Damn gotta go. My college freshman finished her scans."

"Later, Angel." He pouted.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"A gastric bypass in a seventeen year old normal healthy girl. Seriously. I mean what was she thinking? Idiotic. Totally unnecessary. She's young, pretty and has straight A's. It's just stupid to be that worried about her weight." She ranted in her normal rambling voice.

"Maybe she was trying to make her boyfriend happy." He suggested with a shrug. "Teenage girls are notorious for making stupid decisions over boys." And grown men were known for making stupid choices over girls that were in love with other men.

"I don't think it's for the boys, Mark." She disagreed softly.

One eyebrow lifted. "Ah…mommy issues then." He nodded. "You've got this one covered. You're good at the mommy issues." He encouraged.

"People should get a psych eval before they have children." She ranted angrily. "At least that way we'd all be prepared when the kid shows up screwed up and traumatized." She huffed and crossed her free arm over her chest.

"If people had to have a psych eval before they could have kids the human race would die out." He chuckled.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I'm dragging and my patient doesn't want to reverse the procedure because she'd rather be thin." Her voice was monotone. "Her mother almost makes my mom look warm and cuddly too. Tell me something to pick me up." She begged.

"I'm coming to Seattle for Thanksgiving." He told her having only made the decision in that moment. He needed her. He didn't care that she was with McDreamy now. He just needed to see her and hold her in his arms for one moment. He had no plans to steal her from her McDreamy but she was his Angel.

He heard a clatter of dropped charts and a squeal of happiness and grinned. "Really? Seriously? Promise?"

The spur of the moment decision made more sense the longer he thought about it. He could easily get the time off. "Yeah. I wanna meet the friends and McDreamy. I promise not to beat him up." He promised insincerely.

"Yes!" She screamed happily. "Now I'm happy and hyper and good and awake. I've missed you like mad." He could just see the grin that stretched her mouth from ear to ear.

"I know." He grinned and opened his browser to book the tickets. "That's why I'm coming. I can't wait to see you."

"Me either." She laughed joyously. "We're going to have so much fun!"

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I think I hate Bailey. She did that on purpose." Meredith pouted though her voice said it wasn't serious and that she was still in a hyper mood.

"Did what, Angel?" He chuckled heartily and put his feet up on his desk. Whatever demon had been hounding him early this morning was gone without even dust to mark his passing. It had completely disappeared the moment he'd hit send for the transfer of the money from his account to pay for the plane ticket to Seattle.

"I have bile in my hair." She groaned out. "Seriously. The organ spattered in my face. Gross. And I could see Bailey laughing. On the inside but she was still laughing at me."

"Yeah." He stifled his snickers as much as he could. "I hate it when that happens."

"Me too." She moaned pitifully.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Izzie just accused me of getting all the best surgeries because I'm sleeping with McDreamy. And she did it in front of Bailey." She fumed.

"She'll get over it." He assured her.

"It's a damn lie though! I get good surgeries because I'm good at what I do. I'm a good doctor, dammit!" Meredith yelled loudly.

"Grey! Get off the phone and go tell the parents." Bailey's voice floated through the lines. "Tell Mark you're busy!"

"Does everyone know about me?" He asked astonished at the grapevine of gossip that was Seattle Grace Hospital.

"Pretty much." She told him. "And I'm not getting accused of you favoring me. This is stupid. I'll talk to you later. Gotta go tell the parents the consequences of their daughter's surgery. I really hope this wakes the mom up to what she's doing to her kid." Her angry tone had bled into defeat.

"Me too." Though he really doubted it. Ellis Grey had never woken to the wonderful person her daughter was.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I think she's going to be okay." Meredith confided. "Parental wise anyway. Her dad's good for her. He's gonna help her through this and he told her mom to shut up."

"Better than nothing, right?" He mused softly glad that she had at least one parent was on her side.

"Yeah." She agreed. "Better than nothing."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Cris got to scrub in on a hemispherectomy on a two-year-old girl while I was running around with bile in my hair and telling a seventeen year old girl that her life has been completely changed because of a decision she made to please her mother. I think I hate her and she's my best girl friend." She whined.

"I think I hate her too." He agreed hastily.

"Good someone needs to stick with me."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"This was the longest, crappiest day in the history of long, crappy days."

"Botched gastric bypasses, little girls losing half their brains, infected tattoos, sick co-workers, pissy roommates, yeah your day sucked." He chuckled at her.

"On the other hand…the girls lived and George and McDreamy bonded over a drunk anesthesiologist. So some good came from today. And you're coming out here to see me soon." That would be the one thing that got her through the rough days.

"And you got laid last night so that must count for something." He teased her.

"True." She nodded and headed home.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So Izzie just called me." He sang out and hoped he hadn't woken her up with the late night phone call.

"Oh God." She groaned, he could hear the sound of water in the background and had a sudden vision of her wrapped in a towel waiting for the shower to warm up. "Why?"

"She wanted the details of your sex life and thought I had them." He grinned as he teased her immodestly.

"Oh God." She groaned unhappily. "I'm gonna kill her. Seriously this time, I'm seriously going to kill her."

"Don't kill her. It's kinda cute." He protested.

"Only you would find that cute." She whined.

"Did you hear about her case today?" He changed the subject and hoped to keep her on the phone just a bit longer. He knew she was tired but he just wanted to hear her voice for a few more minutes.

"No she hasn't been talking to me, remember?"

"Then I'll tell you all about the guy that swallowed his girlfriend's keys to stop her from leaving him." He grinned, pleased that he could share some Seattle Grace gossip with her for once.

"Seriously?" She spit out a mouthful of toothpaste. "Who does that?"

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I slept with McDreamy last night." She told him in a whisper.

"Good morning, Angel." He returned in a wry tone as he stretched. "What do you mean? You sleep with him nearly every night."

"No, well yeah, I do. But last night we just slept. It was good. Haven't actually slept with a guy since you. It was nice, really nice." She sounded surprised. She normally didn't like sleeping beside anyone else. Mark had always been the only exception.

"Izzie's right." He tried to sound happy for her. It was difficult though. He liked the fact that he was the only one she was comfortable enough with to actually sleep well beside. "You are falling in love with him and I'm so glad. You deserve to be happy. You deserve this, Mer so just go with it. Don't break up with him. Let him take care of you."

"I don't need someone to take care of me." She objected.

"I know. Still though…it might make a nice change of pace."

"Yeah, maybe." She sighed. She liked it that Mark was concerned but she could take care of herself just fine. "Still coming out here for Thanksgiving?" She changed the subject.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world." He promised.

"Good. I think you'll really like him." She claimed in a hopeful voice.

He didn't exactly agree with her. McDreamy was taking the one good thing left in his life. He wanted to like the other man if only for her sake but he knew that the best he'd be able to manage was civility and even that would be difficult. God help McDreamy if he ever caused Meredith pain. He'd find out that the Angel had the Devil himself guarding her back.


	8. Save Me

**Disclaimer: Not mine. **

**A/N: So…Normally flames don't bother me. It at the very least means that someone is reading my story. But tomorrow, or today as you're reading this, is my uncle's memorial service and I really didn't need to read a review that unkind and derogatory. **

**"LMFAO! The ONLY way to make this shitty garbage worse is to make it Derek and Lexie. Please do. We would have a field day mocking it on twitter. You are an idiot. Please continue. We are ready."**

**Authors like me put ourselves out there and try to entertain other people with our stories. No matter how much you dislike a story don't flame the author and especially don't flame and then not leave a name. That's rude and cruel. So to the guest that left the above review have a great life and I hope someday you see how very immature you actually are.**

**Oh, and thanks for the idea. I was leaning towards Derek and Lexie and you just cemented the decision.**

**A/N 2: I was going to wait and post this tomorrow but I don't want the above note to affect my day tomorrow which is already going to be hard enough. So I'm posting it today. I hope those of you that like this story enjoy the chapter and those of you that don't? Why the Hell are you still reading?**

**Save Me**

"Why won't he just tell me?" She complained. "I only want to know something but he's like a clam or something. He won't tell me anything about himself."

"Have you told him about you?" He asked reasonably.

"Well, yeah, some of it. I mean he knows about you. He doesn't like it but it's kinda hot when he's jealous." She giggled happily.

"Did you tell him everything about me?" He wondered aloud and in shock if she had. Sure he'd told Addie all about her but that was a bit different.

"Except your name, profession and location." She told him unconcerned.

He sat back against the headboard in shock; that meant he knew everything. "Why not that stuff?"

She laughed. "Cuz he's as bad as you are. Besides that part isn't important. You're my Mark. That's the part he needs to know. He needs to know that I'll drop everything and come to you if you need me." She said it sternly, as though he needed the reminding that he was still important to her. He was grateful for it. He did need the reminder.

"Aw. I'd do the same for you."

"I know." Her voice was confident. She really did know that he'd do anything for her.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So a psychic?" He asked in awe. He wasn't sure if he actually believed in psychics but he was willing to entertain the notion.

"Don't tell me you actually believe that stuff." She scoffed with a giggle.

"Hey, I'm open minded." He returned. "And I'm not the one that went to see a gypsy fortune teller to find out if she should go to Med School." He reminded mockingly.

"Shut up." She felt her cheeks heat a bit. "Change of subject. McDreamy said to roll with it and that we'd find these things out about each other." She hoped he went with the change of subject.

He rolled his eyes but let it slide. "That's what I said. Stop trying so hard, Angel. Learning about each other is supposed to be fun."

"He won't even tell me his favorite color or what he does on his days off or anything." She complained.

"I think he likes seeing you squirm." He laughed.

"Men!" She yelled in frustration.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"He told me to lighten up, Mark! Me! I asked for some basic information and he told me to lighten up!" It was going to be another one of those days. His Angel was growling again and she was causing a reaction that he had no intention of ever clueing her in to.

"What'd you ask him?" He cleared his throat and shifted in his desk chair.

"Favorite ice cream. Where he spent his summers. Grandparents names. And where he grew up. He didn't answer any of them." Her pout was nearly as bad as her growl today.

"Stop overthinking things, Angel. You'll find that stuff out in time." He advised her uncomfortably.

"But I don't know anything about him! I don't even know where he went to school and that's a big thing for a doctor. It makes me think he's hiding something."

"Like what?"

She sighed heavily. "I don't know. A dark past as a serial killer. Secret wives. A fetish for baby play. I have no idea. If I knew then I wouldn't be asking would I?"

Mark's helpless laughter rang out from the speaker on her phone. "Angel…I don't think he's hiding any of that. He doesn't seem the type."

"You don't know any more about him than I do." She accused in another growl.

He bit back a moan of mingled despair and pleasure. "No. No I don't but I'm a man I can get a sense of these things. He's enjoying watching you squirm which is mean but not in a bad way."

"I think I hate you sometimes." She growled again.

Mark shifted again and eyed the bathroom connected to his office. He was going to need another shower soon. "But you love me more than you'll ever hate me."

"It's not fair when you're all logical and I'm being irrational. Stop it."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"He's not listening to me again." She sighed loudly. "The paralysis patient has to be psychosomatic. There's nothing in his scans. They're all clear."

"Angel…" He started, intent on reminding her that she didn't know everything and her McDreamy might just be correct.

"I know." She sighed again. It was just too bad that he was a doctor too. If he wasn't then he'd agree with her. "I'm an intern and I don't know everything and I should just let him do his job and the psychic agrees that it's not psychosomatic. But I just…"

"You want to be right." He cut her off before she could start rambling. "Angel, we all want to be right but all of us screw up sometimes and it's better to be sure than to just send him off to psych without exploring every avenue."

"I really hate it when you're reasonable." She pouted.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Did George really intubate an esophagus?" He asked her with an amused laugh.

"That's the news." She grinned. "Where'd you hear it?"

"Cristina."

"Why do all of my friends have your number now? And why do they call you as often as I do?" She sounded more amused than exasperated. He was glad. He liked her friends. They were interesting.

"Cuz they're your friends and they like me. So now they're my friends too." It was a different experience for him. Normally questions from and the actions of interns only pissed him off. These interns amused him.

"Fine. Just don't tease George about this. He's really upset over it." She cautioned.

"But I can mock him when he can't hear me, right?"

"You're such a jerk. You're just lucky I love you." She laughed at him. "Now if you'll excuse me I need to finish prepping the O.R. for an exploratory spinal surgery for my psychosomatic paralyzed patient."

"Have fun with that."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Give me the news on the bovine valve when you get finished with your spinal thing. I really want to know if Alex pulled it off because it sounds cool. And I'm bored. So call me and give me your news because New York is dull and lifeless and the West Coast sounds better every day."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You should talk to Cristina. Really. She's going through some stuff and she made me promise not to tell you what it was but seriously talk to her. Then call me about Alex."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Okay, Alex is scrubbing in on the bovine valve. He's ecstatic even though he has to find a rabbi. Cristina isn't telling me anything. She's in a mood and well, I wish you'd just tell me." She leaned back against the wall and waited for him to break.

"I promised that I wouldn't." He stood firm against her for once.

"You suck but I understand. You're too easy to talk too." She was proud even as she wished he'd just tell her.

"And confiding in someone that lives all the way across the country is safer than telling someone close. Besides she doesn't really know me and so she doesn't care what I think." He pointed out.

"True. And McDreamy still isn't talking to me about the important stuff. He was right about the clot but dammit, why can't he just give me a reason to believe? Is that really so much to ask?"

Against his better judgment, because she was right, he stuck up for the other man. "Give him some time. Maybe he'll wow your socks off."

"Meh." She was reluctant to agree. She really wanted to believe Derek but she needed something to hold onto when she got confused and depressed. Anything would work. Anything to prove that this stuff between her and Derek was real.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So Izzie's psychic was really psychic?" He let his surprised pleasure bleed into his voice. That psychic was an interesting man. He'd said some stuff when he'd talked to Izzie earlier that just made him want to grin.

"She thinks so. Me, I'm not sure and I don't really care. I mean it's good for her but I don't need a psychic to learn to believe, right?" She was nearly begging him for reassurance.

"Yeah." He wasn't sure if that was reassuring enough but it was all he had. He was still reeling from Mr. Duff's words. Within a year he'd be with the woman that was his forever. Duff hadn't told him who it was only that she was out there and waiting for him. He was fairly sure it wasn't his Angel, since she was head over heels for McDreamy, and he couldn't imagine allowing another woman into his life with the same depth as he had her but he was willing to try.

"So McDreamy's being all mysterious and taking me somewhere. If you don't hear from me in the morning then I told you so and I expect you to avenge my no doubt painful death." Her voice was hopeful and terrified at the same time.

"What happened to believing?"

"I believe just fine and I trust him but I still expect you to avenge me." She told him firmly.

He couldn't help but chuckle at her. "Okay. I will but you'll be fine. He might surprise you with his perfection."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"No gloating." She ordered.

"I'm not. How was it?" He grinned, happy that she was happy and safe.

"Good. And now I have to go because I want breakfast before we go back to work and he's still sleeping." That explained her whispering.

"I'm not. Hello Meredith's brother type person." A strangely familiar male voice called to him.

"Hello back…I think. Why do I recognize his voice?" He wondered out loud. It was going to bother him relentlessly until he figured it out.

"No clue." She giggled. "Love you. Call me later."

"Yeah." He answered distractedly.


	9. Who's Zoomin' Who?

**Disclaimer: They really aren't mine. Unfortunately.**

**Who's Zoomin' Who?**

"Mer, call me. Really it's important. And kinda urgent. You're not gonna like it. And it's not about me. Just…look call me. Soon. Like now. I really need to talk to you about something and it's kinda about me but more about something else. Crist. Really call me immediately."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Mark! What the Hell? I'm calling you and I get your voice mail. I'm freaking out. Tell me what's going on. If you're dying of something I swear to God I will kill you myself. Don't be dying. Please. I couldn't handle that. Really, I can't. Just call me back now. Please. Tell me you're okay. Cuz if you're not I don't know what I'd do. McDreamy's wonderful but you…you're you and I need you and you can't die. Please."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I'm not dying, Angel. I swear I'm not dying, I'm not even sick. There isn't anything wrong with my health. I promise. Stop freaking out about that, okay? Still…what I have to tell you is so not good. Don't shoot the messenger okay? I love you and I'm not leaving my news on your voice mail. Just call me back as soon as you get this. It would figure the one day I really need to talk to you and we're playing phone tag. It's important. Call me Mer. Really."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"What is going on today? This is insane! McDreamy's keeping something from me. He's hiding something and so is everyone else. Including you. You never hide things from me. And you are and it's scaring me. Would you just tell me what it is so that I can stop freaking out about you? Look just tell me and get it over with. I need to know. I don't care what the news is. Really. Just tell me so we can get through whatever it is. Call me back."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Dammit! Mer! Stop avoiding me! Why are you the only one out there that I can't get a hold of! I've talked to Izzie, Cris, George and even Alex today! Answer your freaking phone! Sorry. Sorry. I don't mean to yell but I really need to talk to you and we keep missing each other and this is driving me insane."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I am not avoiding you. I've called you back every time. Now I'm on lunch so I'm gonna go grab my food and eat with my friends. Please call me back before lunch is over. George has syphilis by the way. Did he tell you? I'm sure he did. All my friends call you for advice. Is that what the emergency is about? Is one of them in trouble or something? Just call me back and tell me already. The suspense is killing me."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Again? Dammit, Mer. Really? What are you doing? You know all of your…well our friends are calling me to find out what's up and I can't tell them because I have to tell you first. Fuck. Call me back. I really need to talk to you and I hope I'm wrong but…Look just what's McDreamy's name? It's important. Really important."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Why does his name matter? Mark. You're freaking me out. Seriously. And this day is just getting stranger and stranger. You need to just tell me. You'll feel better and so will I. And I was on the phone with the nursing home. I should have known you'd call while I was busy on mommy stuff. It's the story of my life today. Figures. Love you."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Getting really sick of this! Any other day I never miss you and today when it's important then I can't catch you. This sucks. Really. I can't leave this on your voice mail. I really wish I could tell you in person but I can't and I'm not leaving a message like this on your phone. It's not going to happen. So just…fuck. Gotta go. Call me."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Mer. Seriously. Where the Hell are you? This has been the most aggravating day of my life! Call me dammit! Please."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"And we're on the merry go round again. This is getting very old very fast. Anyway. Fine. His name's Derek. Derek Shepherd. And I think…no, I know I'm in love with him. He makes me so happy. And I told him. About mom I mean. I told him she has Alzheimer's. And he comforted me. It was sweet. I don't like keeping secrets. I never have and I'm a horrible liar. So. I'll wait for you to tell me. Whatever your secret is. I don't care. I love you. You're my best friend. So I'll just wait and you can tell me. And I'm sorry about the whole phone thing. It's been a strange day but it's ending on a good note. Really. Cuz now I'm off. And we can talk and Derek's great. And I can't wait for you to meet him. So, I'll hold onto my phone and I'll be here when you call me."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Mark? You answered."

"Yeah. I just got finished listening to your message."

"Oh God. He's…Mark…he's married. And she's here. And I didn't know. I didn't and, and, and…I can't breathe. Mark I can't breathe."

"Dammit Angel. I'm so sorry."

"That's…that's what he said and then he left with her. And what am I supposed to do? Mark. He's married."

"I know, Angel. I know."

"How did you know? Mark, is this why you've been trying to call me all day? You knew? How did you know?"

"Mer…er, his wife is Addie. I slept with his wife and he was my best friend growing up. My best friend until you and I slept with his wife and I thought I fell in love with her and it's…it's all a mess now. You weren't supposed to get involved in this mess."

"You slept with her. I really…I can't breathe. I have to go. Mark, I have to go and I don't know what to do and I'm…I'm…I have to go."

"Mer? Angel? Mer! Shit!" The silence on the other end of the phone nearly stopped his heart and tears gathered in his eyes. "Crap."


	10. Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head

**Disclaimer: Still not mine. And with the ways their lives go that's a good thing because my sex drive isn't nearly high enough to handle them.**

**A/N: I was thinking of breaking the seasons up into individual stories but…I haven't. I'll keep them all together for now. Please review and enjoy the chapter.**

**Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head**

"You slept with McDreamy's wife?" Cristina shouted before Meredith could say a single word.

"You told her, Angel?" He asked carefully.

"No." She snorted. "I told her Derek was married and she made the rest of the connections on her own. Cuz she's smart. I'm not mad at you anymore. I wasn't mad to begin with. It was just a lot to process. Now Jose and I have processed and we're good." She cooed at him.

"Okay." He tried to keep the relief from bleeding into his voice. "We're good then. Am I still invited for Thanksgiving?" He really hoped he was. He needed to see her and make sure she was okay.

"Of course." She told him in a 'are you really that crazy' voice. "I've always known who you are. That didn't bother me and she is very…leggy and beautiful and Hell if I were a guy I'd do her." Mark could read the telltale signs of a tipsy Meredith. Normally he liked a tipsy Angel but he was heartbroken for the reason she was tipsy tonight. He wished he had known who McDreamy was from the start and then he could have saved her this pain.

"Me too." Cristina sang out not yet drunk but well on her way.

"Cris—" Meredith raised a brow at his tone. Mark usually only used that big brother tone with her when she was doing something he thought was stupid. Why was Cristina getting the big brother tone?

"No." Cristina interrupted him swiftly. "We're playing whose life sucks the most and I haven't told Mer why she hasn't won yet. So we're going to hang up so we can get back to playing and Mer will call you in the morning." She promised him.

"Right." He nodded to himself. He should give Cris the chance to tell Meredith herself. "Bye Cris. Bye Angel."

"Bye Marky." They chorused.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Sorry man." George's voice answered Angel's phone. He wondered why briefly but George was still talking. "Mer's passed out. She didn't get that drunk, I don't think. I think it's emotional more than anything. Joe collapsed at the bar and then we bumped into McAss at the hospital cuz he got Joe's case and they had a screaming match…well, Mer screamed and threatened to run him down in the parking lot." George had a bit of a chuckle in his voice.

"They had a screaming match in the hospital?" Mark questioned astounded. Angel usually had more control than that.

"No," George denied. "It was outside the doors. Right outside the doors but still outside and I don't think anyone else saw them or heard them. It was raining and stuff."

"That's better than inside anyway. Mer screams really loudly. Get her home and put her to bed." He advised the younger man. He knew George would do it. George still had that crush.

"I will." George promised without hesitation. He knew that his crush on Meredith was never going to be anything more and he was no longer hoping that it would. Meredith needed something that he just didn't have. He just hoped this thing with Derek didn't ruin her for good.

"Ask her to call me tomorrow?" Mark's voice was hesitant. Did George know that this was his fault?

"Always." George promised. He knew, now, about Mark's role in this little drama but he didn't blame the man. Derek was the one who had hidden his marriage and practically promised Meredith forever without being free to give it to her. Mark might have slept with Derek's wife but Derek had hurt Mer. They had all forgiven Mark for his stupidity a long time ago. They might not have known that the husband was Derek but that didn't matter. Mark didn't make Derek come to Seattle and break Mer's heart; Derek had done that one all on his own.

"Thanks George." Mark sighed. He really wished he was there right about now. His Angel needed him and he was stuck in New York.

"I'll take care of her, Mark," George told him. "At least until you can get here and do it yourself." George smiled softly at the phone and the sleeping woman in the passenger's seat. Mark loved her. He had no doubt that Mark was going to come out here at his first opportunity.

"Thanks George. You're a good guy," Mark paused. "I'm sor—"

"No," George stopped him. "Don't be. I like Mer but I already knew that she didn't like me like that. It's okay. I just hope I find someone as amazing as she is someday. I'm glad she has you. If she didn't then maybe things would be different for me and her but she does have you and I'm glad."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark flipped his phone shut after talking to George. The younger man's words were making him think harder than he'd ever even wanted too. Meredith was depending on him. His angel had broken her wings and she needed someone to make her fly again.

This was not good. He had done this. Christ! "She wasn't supposed to be involved with this mess," he groaned out loud and flopped back on the bed. "Dammit!"

He gave a brief thought to flying out to Seattle and dragging Addie back to New York so that Angel could have her happy ending. He tossed the thought away. Even if he dragged Addie away Angel wouldn't be with Derek. She might want to but she would never be able to trust him again.

Her trust was fragile. And Derek had broken it. It would take more effort than Derek had ever been willing to expend to get it back.

"Dammit," he cursed again. How was he supposed to fix this?

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You know you ask me to call you and then I get voice mail. That pretty much sucks, Marky. Anyway. Yeah. I'm gonna go now. I'll have my phone. I love you."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Didn't it just figure, she thought harshly as she strode down the corridor to find Addison Shepherd. She finally found the other woman standing with Derek and Burke. Why in the Hell did she always choose the worst times to find the people she was looking for?

The delight in Addison's eyes made Meredith feel sick to her stomach. Was the red head really that intent on making her pay for Derek's stupidity?

She did her best to answer Addison's rapid fire questions and glared at her after they'd left the patient's room. Damn the woman for doubting her. She was good at her job. Her love life may be the stuff of daytime TV but she was damn good at her job.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Your Addison got me put on her service today. I don't think I like her. She's a bitch." Meredith whined.

He bit back his instinctive denial of Addison being his anything. "I'm sorry. How do you feel?"

"I didn't get drunk last night, Mark." She protested with a roll of her eyes at his overprotectiveness. "I had, like, six shots and that was it."

"That wasn't what I meant." He groaned.

"Oh." She paused and let out a small smile. He was rather sweet with her and only her. She had always liked that about him. "I'll get through it…I think."

"You will. You want me to come give you moral support and stuff?" He offered in another snap decision. Snap decisions seemed to have become the norm for him lately. He didn't think he'd regret this one any more than the Thanksgiving one.

"Yes. No. I don't know." She rubbed at her forehead in confusion.

"I'll be there as soon as I can then." He promised without giving her the chance to find an objection. "Love you."

"No." She finally found an objection. "Mark. You'll only piss him off and she doesn't love you and so she'll piss you off and it'll be a mess and as much as I want you to come you have a life in New York and…I love you too." She really did want him to come here and let her lean on him. But on the other hand, she didn't want to cause any more tenseness between the three of them.

"Not listening." He ignored her easily. He could always ignore her when she was trying to hide her pain from him. "I'll see you soon, Angel and besides I don't care whether Derek and Addie are happy about it or not. I'm coming for you and your friends will be happy to see me."

Meredith let out a small giggle. "I think they like you better than me."

"They haven't seen us together yet." He grinned. They were so going to hate the two of them when he got there. The sugary sweetness would drown even Izzie. He couldn't wait to make them all puke.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Are you really going to come out here and be my support?" She asked him in a small little girl voice.

"Yes." He said firmly, instantly. "Got a few things to finish here and then I'm on a plane in a few days. Why?"

"She's got me working with her and the woman is alone because her husband left her for his secretary three weeks into her pregnancy. I feel dirty because I'm the other woman. I've never been the other woman. I screwed around and I slept with guys but they weren't married and they weren't relationships." She rambled.

Mark frowned. What was Addie playing at? Granted she didn't know that Meredith was his Angel but Addie wasn't usually this vindictive. Besides she'd cheated on Derek. She had no right to be so angry at Angel. "Hold it together and you can break down when I get there. Really. I miss you. I'll be there as soon as I can." He promised her again.

"I'll do my best but I may break down on Izzie or someone soon." She let her breath out in a shaky sigh.

"Have them call me if you do and I'll talk them through it."

"Funny." She gave a watery chuckle.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith was really not looking forward to this. The woman was bitter and she really did have a right to be. But Meredith didn't think she was strong enough to deal with it today.

Fifteen years was a long time. She wondered how long Addison and Derek had been together. How much history had she stumbled into?

Something on the ultrasound caught her eye and she frowned. Dammit! Could nothing go right for Ms. Phillips?

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Crap! They were together. Why did she have to keep bumping into them when they were together? There was no help for it though. She had to tell Addison about the scan.

"Dr. Shepherd?" She interrupted what looked to be an argument.

They both turned to look at her. "Yes?" They asked simultaneously.

Meredith ignored Derek and looked only at Addison. "Labs confirm what look like abnormalities on the ultrasound. I think you should come and see for yourself." She was proud of her even tone and relaxed posture. She could be professional.

Addison nodded. "Fine. Let's go." She headed down the corridor without looking at her husband.

"Meredith," Derek said quietly as she turned to follow Addison. "Meredith," he tried again when she ignored him.

She gave him a long, hard look. "Don't," she told him and disappeared through the door.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

She pointed out the abnormality she spotted to Addison. She made sure to keep the diagnosis in medical speak to try and keep Ms. Phillips in the dark for a few more minutes. She had enough stress and this would only make it worse.

The bitter, pregnant woman wouldn't let her hide though. "In English, please," she pressed irritably.

Addison sighed and turned to the bed. "We've detected what looks like the beginning of heart failure in the twins." She told Ms. Phillips bluntly. "Don't be alarmed," she continued in a calm voice.

Her eyes widened anyway though. "Are my babies gonna be okay?" She asked in a scared voice.

"I'm gonna go ahead and take you into surgery now. We're not going to wait," Addison said quickly. She turned her head and looked at Meredith. "Book the O.R.," she ordered. She wasn't quite sure what she was expecting from Meredith. Rebellion, angry looks, incompetence? What she got was calm and quick acceptance and a surgeon that was obviously good at what she did. Dammit! She really had wanted to hate Meredith and she couldn't.

"Yes, Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd," Meredith nodded and left the room in a rush to book the O.R.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"She's wants me in the O.R. She wants me there so that she can show off. Why is she trying to hurt me, Mark?" She was nearly hyperventilating again.

Mark sighed as confused as Meredith was over Addison's actions. "Because she can. And because she probably knows who you are. She knows that the two men who loved her love you as well."

"That sucks. That's awful and spiteful and petty." She couldn't quite reconcile this mean, spiteful, vindictive woman with the sweet, funny, caring one that Mark had told her about months before.

"Just be yourself and she'll come around." Mark rubbed at the headache forming in his temple. He really hated being this far away. "Addie's not a bad person. She's just hurting because of Derek and me a bit. Derek ignored her for years before she finally slept with me. And she still loved him. She'll never stop loving him. Ever." And neither would Meredith. What was it about the man that had once been closer to him than a brother that made these two women love him so much?

"She's the victim, you know?" Meredith sighed. "I already knew that. And it makes me feel awful and guilty and like a dirty mistress."

"You shouldn't feel guilty." He pointed out. "You didn't know. You need to tell her that. It won't make it any better and she probably already knows that you didn't know he was married but you should tell her." He urged. "It'll help in the long run." It would at least show Addison that Meredith wasn't one to be intimidated by things that were not her fault.

"Yeah." Meredith agreed. "Okay."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Addison assured Ms. Phillips that she wouldn't feel anything and then got to work. She talked through the surgery in a teaching voice. She paid no attention to her surroundings losing herself in the job she loved. One part of her knew that Meredith was watching her intently and she ignored it. She wasn't sure why Meredith was so intent on her and at that moment in time she didn't much care. She had a job to do.

Meredith let all of the drama and pain bleed away from her. This was where she belonged. This was her home. The O.R. She listened to the voice and didn't care whose it was. She only wanted to learn. She wanted to be the person holding the scalpel. She would be and she wouldn't let anything stand in her way of doing the best she could. She watched those feminine hands cut and repair. She let the words wash over her and lodge inside her brain. Someday, someday soon that would be her.

The look finally got to Addison. Meredith hadn't taken her eyes off her the entire time they'd been in the O.R. "How you doing there, Grey?"

Meredith took a breath as though coming out of a trance. "Good," she nodded quickly. "I'm good." And Addison understood then. Meredith hadn't been watching her boyfriend's wife. She'd been watching the surgeon.

Oh, Addison's mind stopped for a moment. Oh, was all she could think.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd?" Meredith asked quietly as they scrubbed out. "I…um…I didn't know, you know? I thought he was just another guy in a bar. And he didn't tell me. The whole time we were together he didn't say a word about you."

Addison's brain finally woke back up at her words. It gave one last whimpering oh and then moved on. She faced the other woman and swallowed. She'd been so busy trying to hate this sweet, caring woman that she had ignored her pain. "I…" she paused not sure what to say.

"I know it doesn't change anything and I know you hate me. And that's okay. I can understand that too. I'd hate me. I do hate me. But I didn't know and I'm so very sorry and I wish I had known and I wish I could fix it and go back and tell him to fuck off and to go back to his Isabella Rossilini look alike wife. Cuz I would. I swear I would. I don't like adultery. It's just not…it's not right and I…" Meredith wound down abruptly when Addison placed a gentle hand on her arm.

"Stop," Addison gently ordered. "I know. Don't be sorry. Please. I shouldn't have been so angry with you. I cheated on him first. You're innocent in all of this and I should have known that. So I'm sorry. Really." She closed her eyes and squeezed Meredith's arm again. "Do you love him?"

Meredith bit her lip and shrugged helplessly. "I could have," she admitted quietly. "It would have been so easy to love him. But I just don't know. I hate that he lied to me and right now I'm angry and hurt but I don't know how much of it is my pride stinging and how much is actual hurt because I might have loved him."

Addison took her hand away and turned back to the sinks. "Meredith…I don't want to hurt you. But I will. I want my husband back. I love him and I miss him. If you aren't already in love with him don't fall for him. If you are…then, well…Anyway I am sorry."

Meredith nodded and silently finished scrubbing out.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Addison ran the wand over Ms. Phillips' stomach. "See," she said with a cheeriness she didn't feel. "Just a small scar."

One of the woman's hands curled on the side of her stomach. "And my babies?" She asked fearfully.

Addison's smile remained on her face as she turned away to wipe off the wand. "Your babies are doing very well." She was glad that was going right though nothing else seemed to be. She had wanted to hate Meredith and she just couldn't. She cleared her throat and glanced at the still form leaning on the wall by the door. "And Dr. Grey will be back to check on you a little bit later," she stood up.

"Actually I'd prefer it if Dr. Grey were taken off the case," she interrupted.

Addison's eyes widened and she threw a look to Meredith. "Why? Is there a problem?" She asked in surprise.

"She just reminds me of someone I don't like very much," she said in a wounded voice. "Someone my husband likes a lot, particularly in lingerie. You understand."

Addison's jaw nearly dropped. Meredith had been putting up with this all day and hadn't breathed a word. Her strength of character astounded Addison. "No. No, I don't understand."

The woman lifted up on her elbows a bit. "Well, she's sleeping with your husband, right?"

Addison drew in a deep breath and then let it out. "Ms. Phillips…I lack Dr. Grey's class and patience, so let me set the record straight." She might be hurt and sad because Derek had moved on so quickly but she wasn't about to let this bitter, lonely woman take her anger out on the only innocent in this tragedy. "My husband didn't cheat on me. I cheated on him. So the wronged woman here—Dr. Grey. So I think you owe her one Hell of an apology." We all do, she thought sadly.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"She admitted it to a patient in front of me. She called me the wronged woman. I didn't want to like her Mark. But I do. I really do. It takes guts to do that." She certainly sounded impressed by Addie's defense.

"I told you Addie was a good person." He crowed just a little. "She's just a little messed up right now."

"Aren't we all?" She pointed out wryly. "Anyway. I'm headed out to Derek's to get the story from him. I don't know if I can forgive him and I don't know what's going to happen. I just need to know. I need to hear what he has to say."

"Yeah." He agreed. She needed that closure before she could move on. "You gonna tell him that your Mark is his Mark?" He wondered.

"I don't know. Maybe." She waffled. "I should. Before you come."

"Yeah." He knew she wouldn't though. She liked having him to herself too much. And there was that small part of her that remembered that she had nearly loved Derek and she wouldn't want to hurt him with this piece of knowledge.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"He says I saved him. That he felt like he was drowning and I saved him. It's not enough, Mark. It's just…not enough. I can't trust him." She had known in a split second while he was talking that he was so full of shit that he really was drowning in it. No matter what his words said the lost look in his eyes told her everything she needed to know. Addison had hurt him yes but he'd chosen to let it destroy him. He wanted the bright, happy Meredith that teased and joked and held him at arm's length. He didn't want the wrecked woman with the dark thoughts and bad childhood.

"Yeah. I know. He's Derek. He's perfect and wonderful until he isn't." Mark knew the darkness inside of her. And he understood it in a way that Derek never could. Derek had never even tried to understand it.

"Something like that." There was a long silence between them. Not uncomfortable or pressing just silence while they both got lost in their thoughts. "So Cristina and Burke then? I didn't see that one coming." She switched the subject to something less painful.

"She finally spilled it?" He went with the change of subject in favor of gossip and something lighter.

"No. I had to find out from George who caught them kissing in a stairwell. I confronted her and she said she didn't want to talk about it. Why did she tell me if she didn't want to talk about it?" Meredith didn't understand that at all.

"Cristina's complicated and she does have a reason she told you. No," he continued before she could ask. "I don't know what it is but I know there is one. Just give her some time and she'll come clean and tell you."

"Okay." She nodded and pulled into a spot on the ferryboat. "I can do that. I won't push her. I'm heading to Joe's. I need a drink."

"Be safe." He admonished.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I'm her person, that's why she told me. Cuz I'm her person. I like being someone's person." Meredith told him in a slurred voice.

"Good reason. You drunk?" He asked.

"Only a little." She admitted.

"Planning on getting more drunk?"

"No. I just wanna go home and crawl into bed. I'm tired and I'm sad and I'm confused and I just want to go home. It'd be nice to crawl in with someone but I don't have anyone." She paused for a moment. "Maybe I'll take Cristina home with me. Burke dumped her so she's all sad and depressed too. She needs someone same as me."

"Cristina's not the cuddling type but I think it's an excellent plan. I know I'll have good dreams tonight." He grinned knowing that she'd get a kick out of his pervy thoughts tonight.

"Pervert." She accused with a giggle.

"You know it." He answered. "Still…it's a good image."

"It won't happen."

"Ever," Cristina broke in. "Ever ever. Shut up, Mark. And let us get back to our drinking and stuff."

"Yes ma'am." He agreed quickly. "Take a cab, Angel. And take Cristina with you so neither of you are alone. I know George and Izzie are working tonight. And Alex is staying with Joe."

"Wouldn't take Alex home with me anyway. He's my friend but damn he's an ass and he'd try to feel us up."

"Maybe." He knew she was completely correct. Alex was just like he had been before he'd met his Angel. He was still a perv and an ass but he wouldn't take advantage of a woman that way anymore.


	11. Enough is Enough (No More Tears)

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy and its characters do not belong to me. I just get to play with them. It's fun. But I don't make any money from it or anything so it's only entertainment. Shutting up now.**

**A/N: To the guest reviewer who can't seem to learn to be nice: I deleted your reviews. I wouldn't normally do that because it is a free country but they were upsetting my sixteen year old daughter who thinks I'm brilliant. You know what's funny about that? She doesn't even like Grey's Anatomy. Calls it a soap opera and rolls her eyes when I bring it up. What does that say about my parenting skills? You're only lucky I spotted the awful review which I'm not putting up here before any of other friends and family did. Basically calling me a bad writer and questioning how good a parent I am? Not good in my little corner of the world. Please desist with the mean reviews. I have turned on the moderate button so that anonymous reviews don't show up until I see them and yours will never make it onto my page. I hate to do that because until you I've had great reviews for everything I've written even from the anonymous ones but listening to my daughter rant loud enough to for my thirteen year old son to hear and join in about the stupidity and cowardliness of some people is not a good way to start my day or end it. So I apologize to all those guests who would like to leave a review and now have to wait. Blame the coward.**

**Enough is Enough (No More Tears)**

"I hate having a hangover. I really hate having a hangover when I get your voicemail. But what can I expect really. You're a boy. You have a boy penis. The root of all evil is the boy penis. And now Cris and I are in my bathroom puking our guts up because of tequila and boy penises. Not fun. I hate boy penises. And you're a boy. With a boy penis. So I hate you. And you didn't answer so I really hate you. Really. Seriously. Call me later, I have to puke."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"He claims to have marital amnesia." She ranted as soon as she answered. She hadn't even needed to check the caller ID. She knew it was him. "I don't care that his marriage is over. Well, he says it's over. He didn't tell me and he doesn't think it was wrong."

"What's marital amnesia?" He wondered sleepily.

Meredith huffed angrily. How did he not know this stuff already? "She slept with you so she no longer existed to him. What kind of stupid is that? Seriously. Stupid boy penis."

"So the boy penis thing wasn't just the tequila talking?" He laughed.

"No. Cristina claims estrogen and I claim stupid boy penis." She told him adamantly.

"I don't have a boy penis. I have a man penis. It's much better than a boy penis." He boasted.

"Right. That means it sleeps with married women. Knowingly sleeping with married women. See? Male genitalia is stupid." Her voice was waspish.

"Ah. Right. Okay." He wondered if he should take her comments to heart and then decided it was the hangover talking. "Still love me though, right?" He still had to check. Maybe the heartbreak from Derek was bleeding over onto him. He had played a part in her tragedy after all. He had so much making up to do over this mess.

"Humph. Yes." She admitted ungraciously.

And for a reason he couldn't explain he could breathe again.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"For once I'm having a pretty boring routine day." She told him with a bit more brightness to her voice than she'd had earlier. "Car crash and a bowel obstruction and Derek's busy somewhere else and so is Addison. I think I'm gonna make it through the day."

Mark smiled affectionately. "Good that's good. A routine day is just what you need."

"Except I've got way too much time to think." She whined just a little. "I don't like thinking. Well, not this kind of thinking. This kind of thinking gives me a headache. And makes me fidgety and nauseous."

"That's the hangover, Angel." He laughed at her.

"Partly." She agreed. "But, yeah. Gotta go. Bowel obstructions films came back positive for drugs."

"Later, Angel."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"It's not drugs. It's Judy dolls. He swallowed Judy Doll heads." Her voice was a mix of amusement and revolted.

"Yuck," he shuddered in his own revulsion. "And why? Just why?"

"Damned if I know." She shrugged. "Pretty stupid and well crazy. So that's another crazy for Grey. Why do I get the crazies?"

"You're just lucky I guess." He teased. "Everyone has issues. Just be glad you're not crazy like that."

She gave a mock scowl. Mark's teasing was making the emptiness recede. "Which means you think I'm crazy in a different way." She accused in mock anger.

"You are." He could tell she wasn't really angry. She rarely got truly angry with him. "You so are. I love you crazy though."

"You're teasing me." She sounded more surprised than she really ought to be. "You're actually teasing me again. It's been awhile. Since you've done that I mean."

He hadn't realized that if had been such a long time since he's been happy enough to tease her. "Life got kinda messed up for a while but yeah. I like teasing you. It's fun and you're so cute when you're trying to be angry with me for teasing but you just want to laugh instead." He continued with the light-hearted tone.

She giggled unrestrainedly. "You are such an ass." She accused. "Fine, tease me then. But I didn't sleep with my best friend's wife. I've got teasing material for the next fifty years from that. So I'm not the only crazy one."

"Ouch." He affected a wounded tone. "Still on the hating men thing then?"

"Nope, just their penises and their secrets." She told him happily. "You don't have any secrets from me so I only half hate you."

"Lucky me."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You know I should hate Burke. But I can't." She sighed. "He dumped my person like it was a business transaction, so I should really hate him, but he's professional. A bit cold but at least I can work with him without feeling uncomfortable."

He raised one eyebrow and set his file down on the desk. Only a few more and then he could do something else. He'd been taking less and less patients in the past few weeks so that he could take the time off to go see her. "The uncomfortableness? That's on Derek and Addison, not you. And I thought you and Addie were okay now." That was the last he'd heard anyway and no one had told him differently this morning.

"We are," she confirmed. "And she's not here anymore. Not today anyway. Her case is over. I think I could work with her but he keeps watching me. I can feel him watching me. I hate it. I told him it's over. I don't do the married thing. I won't be the dirty mistress. I'm better than that."

"Yes you are." He nodded adamantly even though he knew she couldn't see him. "You always have been. You deserve to be happy and to have someone that puts you first." Then he grinned. "Though we are in the same boat on the dirty mistress thing. We should form a club. The Dirty Mistress Club."

"The _Ex_-Dirty Mistress Club," she corrected. "Love you and gotta go."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith's jaw dropped along with Bailey's as the psych guy added that Mr. Hubble might just enjoy having the Judy Doll heads come out. That was just so very…wrong and gross. She heard the clacking of the heels but didn't actually register them until Addison asked to speak with her for a moment.

Meredith begged Bailey with her eyes to get her out of this conversation. She had been uncomfortable around Derek's wife since Ms. Phillips. She didn't know what to say to her or how to act around her. "Don't look at me for help," Bailey told her dryly.

"I assume he told you why he left me?" Addison started as soon as Meredith caught up to her.

Meredith sighed heavily. She really didn't want to have this conversation. It was none of her business. "Dr. Shepherd, with all due respect," and she did mean that. She respected Addison as a surgeon if nothing else. "This has nothing to do with me."

Addison wasn't sure herself why she'd sought the younger woman out. "Really?" She asked in a disbelieving tone. "So you didn't take him back?" She let that trickle through her mind for an instant and discovered she was pleased. "Good girl."

Addison's patronizing tone, whether she'd meant it to be that way or not, irritated Meredith. "And in the future, I'd appreciate it if we could keep our relationship strictly professional," Meredith said more harshly than she'd intended.

"Meredith?" Addison called after her as she headed down a corridor and away from the conversation. Meredith twisted around despite herself. "Sometimes people do desperate things to get someone's attention." Meredith rolled her eyes in disgust, not completely at Addison, and turned around to walk away again. "There are two sides to…every story," Addison's voice dropped when she realized that Meredith was ignoring her.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I spoke too soon. Addison's here." She blew out a frustrated breath. "And she's doesn't know that I'm your Angel. She tried to tell me her side of the story and called me a good girl when she found out I didn't take him back."

Mark shook his head in confusion. Addie had done nothing but confuse him since she'd gone to Seattle. "Bit patronizing but understandable. She wants him back and she doesn't want to hurt you in the process." He tried to explain the inexplicable.

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever." She scoffed. "Now they're both making me uncomfortable and it's not fair. The only thing I did wrong was sleep with my attending. That's it. I deserve the hoops and stuff from Bailey and the other interns I don't need this stalking and staring and talking. It's none of my business what they do. None." She insisted.

"Have you told them that?" He asked, once again trying to be the reasonable one.

"Yes!" She said loudly. "And neither of them are listening to me. God! My life has become a soap opera. A stupid day time soap opera. Which I have never watched or even thought about watching because they're stupid and full of stupid people that do stupid things and ruin people's lives. And my life is now a soap opera and…and…all that entails."

He laughed his husky laugh. "Just wait until I get there. Then it'll really be a soap opera. I'd apologize for that but well, I'm only sorry you'll be stuck in the middle because I really need to see you and hug you and all that mushy stuff that you'd better never tell anyone."

She smiled happily. "Pssh. I won't. No one would believe me anyway. Besides that side of you is mine. Not anyone else's just mine." She held the secret of his inner mushiness close to her heart and would deny it to her dying breath.

"Yep."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You and Cris really freaked out Izzie and George." He informed her with a bit of a laugh. "They both called me right after lunch because you two are scary and damaged."

"Humph." She snorted. "George still hasn't gotten over his crush and he's stringing Olivia along because he can't tell her that he's in love with someone else and he can't tell me that he's got a crush on me cuz I'm scary and damaged. Stupid boy penises."

He laughed helplessly able to picture her frustrated face and pout. God she was adorable. "You really like that phrase, don't you?"

"It's a good phrase. Really good. And the root of all evil in the world." She told him righteously.

"So I've heard." He drew in a breath to control the laughter. "How's the Judy Doll case?" He asked to try and get onto a subject that wouldn't have her killing him for laughing at her.

"Booked for surgery and not talking about the motivation behind swallowing the doll heads. Maybe I should date a guy from the psych ward." She mused. "A doctor not a patient because I've got all the crazy I can handle."

"He'd drive you nuts trying to fix your mommy issues." He refuted. "Don't date a psych doctor. Seriously. I'd have to stop talking to you then because you'd be all 'express your feelings, Mark' and 'let go of the anger of your past' and 'tell me about your relationship with your mother, Mark'. And then I'd have to kill you and Cristina would help me and George and Izzie would never forgive me and Alex would laugh and you don't want Alex to laugh at me do you?" Somehow he'd picked up her rambling habit.

She giggled. "No. That would be bad. He gets enough amusement from the rest of us. Stupid boy penis."

"And we've come a full circle in this conversation." He pointed out again laughing helplessly.

"It was a fun circle though." She grinned.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You know…all this thinking has led me to a conclusion." She announced.

"Care to share?" He asked.

"Yeah. I've got a few actually. I'm going to be okay. It hurt and I still think that he's McAss but I'm gonna make it. The other is…he still loves her. I really think he does. He wouldn't be so mad at her if he didn't love her. And you. He won't even talk about you. Only said your name once in all the time I've known him. And she's going to keep trying with him because she loves him. Like the forever kind. And she made a mistake. A big one. But she's trying. And I respect her for that. I'm not going to fight her for him. He's not worth it to me but he's worth it to her and so I'm bowing out. I've more important things to fight for."

"Should I cancel my plane tickets?" The essence of her rambling was that she would be fine so he had to ask if she still wanted to see him. He hoped that she did because he really needed to see her.

"No." She objected immediately as he'd hoped she would. "I want to see you. Not because of this mess and not for moral support but just because I want to see you and if a mess like this is the only way to get you to visit then I'll make more. Because you're my best friend and I miss you and I want to see you."

"All right then." He grinned into the darkness of his office. His desk was finally bare. It was a good day.


	12. Make Me Lose Control

**Disclaimer: Still not mine. Stop asking. It's depressing to keep saying it.**

**Make Me Lose Control**

"I told Cristina I wasn't crying over the whole Derek thing until you get here. I told her you have big shoulders and she could borrow one if she wants. So expect a crying mess of women when you get here. Seriously. I know you won't mind because Cristina is my person. And I'm her person. And you're my person. So you're kind of her person too. So just let her cry on your shoulder and then she'll feel better and I'll feel better which will make you feel better. Then we'll all be bright and happy. But not Izzie happy cuz that's scary. Izzie happy is just wrong. No one should be that happy. Ever. So I'll talk to you later cuz Cris and I went jogging and now we have to go to work. Love you."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Leave the sarcasm up to me," Cristina gave Meredith a squeeze to her biceps. "It really doesn't suit you."

Meredith rolled her eyes and turned away as Cristina headed up the stairs; both of them pointedly ignoring the dark haired man watching Meredith walk away. Meredith straightened her spine and headed to the bank of elevators. Cristina only had one floor to go up she could take the stairs. Meredith had five and had no intention of working her aching legs more than she had to.

"Hey Angel," the husky voice breathed into her ear while she waited for the elevator.

"Mark!" She squealed and turned around to lunge at him and wrap her arms around him. "When did you get in? Why didn't you call me? I would have picked you up."

"I wanted to surprise you. Did it work?" He asked with a laugh as he squeezed her back.

"Yes!" She stepped back and away from him. "You look good."

"So do you."

The elevator dinged and she jumped a bit. "Where are you staying?" She asked and ignored the elevator. It had been far too long since she'd been held by these arms and looked at by those eyes. Eyes that had never judged her and found her wanting in any way. Work could wait.

"Nowhere yet. Wanted to see you first." Blue eyes smiled down at her. "I'm glad I did." He pulled her back into his arms and cradled her to his chest.

"Me too." She murmured. "And you can stay with me. You have the address right? Go. Take your stuff to the house and then you can hang out there until I get off or you can come back here and take me to lunch." She looked up at him with a grin.

"You sure?" He asked just to be sure.

"Of course I am." She thumped his chest jokingly. "I wouldn't have you stay anywhere else. So go. Put your stuff in the house. I sent you a key months ago. Go."

He laughed and tightened his arms just a bit. "Are you trying to get rid of me, Angel?"

"No. Yes." She thumped his chest again and laughed, her green eyes sparkling. "I just know the faster you take your things to the house the faster you'll be back here. I know you won't stay at the house because you'd be bored and I know you rented a car because you hate having other people driving you anywhere. So go."

He let her go again and grinned down at her. "Fine. I know when I'm not wanted. I'm going but I'll see you in a bit." He promised.

"Just have me paged when you get back and I'll come collect you." She pulled reluctantly from his embrace and took a step back. "I promise."

Mark shook his head in amusement at her and headed back the way he'd come with her grinning happily after him. He'd been longing for that grin for longer than he cared to remember.

"New man, Grey?" Bailey's sharp voice attacked her senses with its sharp judging edges.

Meredith spun around to face the elevator and her resident. "No." Her delighted grin nearly took Bailey's breath away. She'd never seen the girl with that expression before. It was nearly an Izzie wattage smile. "Mark came for a visit. That was Mark."

"Phone Mark?" Bailey asked for conformation, even though with that expression on Grey's face she already knew the answer. "Is here? In Seattle?"

Meredith entered the elevator and pressed the button for the floor they were both seeking. "Yep. He came to see me." Her smile seemed to up in brightness just a bit.

Bailey shook her head. She wasn't sure what to do with a bright, happy Meredith Grey. "He's a doctor, right?" She asked while she tried to process the change in Grey. She hadn't even beamed that much about Shepherd.

Meredith nodded, her ponytail bouncing as though it too was overcome with some kind of pod person joy. "Plastic surgeon actually." She clarified.

"Hmm. Well, don't moon over him all day." She admonished her. "Is he coming back?"

Grey nodded happily again. "He's taking me to lunch…probably the others too. They like him so we'll all have lunch together and he's staying at my house so…yeah. He'll be back soon. Just went to drop his stuff off. He gets bored easily and I'd rather not have him renovating my house or something because he got bored."

"Hunh." Bailey grunted noncommittally. She'd heard the girl could ramble but that was an understatement evidentally.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"And call your boy to get his ass back here and hang with you today," was Bailey's parting shot as she left the locker room.

That was actually a very good idea, Meredith decided. She pressed the speed dial button and hoped he picked up. If he was caught in traffic or something he wouldn't get the call and she really wanted him here with her.

"Didn't I just leave you?" He chuckled at her eagerness to have him around. He'd missed her unconcealed joy around him.

"Yeah." There was something off about her voice. Something had happened in the time since he'd left her. Something not good. "Well. I need you to come back. Now."

"Angel I'm pulling into your driveway." He told her carefully. "I'll be back soon. What's happened?"

She pulled in a deep breath. "Mom's been admitted." Her voice was a bit shaky but she wasn't completely overwhelmed yet. "And she's agitated. God! Why do they call it agitated when she's screaming and yelling and calling everyone an amateur? She screamed at me not to bother her while she was at work."

He again felt the urge to murder Ellis Grey. God he hated that bitch sometimes. "I'll be right there, Angel." He promised and hoped it be enough to keep her out of the darkness until he could get there.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

She knew Mark would be back any minute but there were a few things she had to do alone. She had to tell the chief. She knocked on his office door.

"Welcome back, Chief," she greeted him with a bright and fake smile. He wouldn't know the difference anyway.

"It's good to be back, Dr. Grey," he told her happily. "What can I do for you?" He waved a hand out in front of him to indicate the chairs on the other side of his desk. "Have a seat."

She ignored the offer and kept the smile on her face. "It's my mother, sir," she started. She passed over the file.

He took the file, face showing confusion and then shock, horror and sorrow as he flipped through the pages. He looked away from her and slowly sank into his chair.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner," she apologized. "I know you two are close, but she made me promise. She seems to be reliving the heyday of her residency a lot these days." He finally looked up at her and his eyes were so sad that they nearly took her breath away. "And…I just thought that…maybe if you could stop by and say hello…it would mean a lot to her."

His grave expression never faltered. "Oh. Of-of course. Of course." He assured her in a sorrow filled tone. "Do you need a day off or anything?" He asked.

"Oh, no," she quickly shook her head in denial. Even with Mark in town she needed to stay here at the hospital. She needed to work. To do something. Maybe not a surgery as she knew if she unclasped her hands they'd be shaking but scut was good enough for today. It was something. "I'm fine." She hoped he believed her.

He knew she wasn't fine but she was her mother's daughter. "Yeah," he waved her off only slightly disappointed that Meredith Grey had been cut from the same cloth as her uncaring mother.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith made her way to her mom's room. She peeked in and motioned George out. "She's allergic to penicillin." She told him even though she was fairly positive that the information was already contained in her mother's chart.

George nodded with a kind expression on his face and put one hand on her shoulder. "Yeah that's what it said on her chart. Who's Thatch, Mer?" He asked.

Meredith's eyes widened a bit and her expression froze. "My dad. Thatcher. She's talking about him? She never talks about him."

"Are you alright, Meredith?"

George's question brought her eyes to his and she read the concern there. "I'm fine, George. Seriously." She tried to reassure her friend that she was okay. "Mark's in town. Just got here. He's coming back to the hospital now."

George's shoulders slumped in relief. "Good. That's good. Go. I'll take care of your mom and you let Mark take care of you, okay?" He squeezed her shoulder and gave her a small smile.

Even with the surprise of her mother's presence at her hospital Meredith smiled at her friend. "Yeah. I will. I'll see you for lunch?"

George nodded happily, glad that she was still holding on. "Of course."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Meredith! Dr. Grey!" The male voice had her shoulders tensing without her conscious permission but she still turned around and faced Derek. "I just heard. You all right? Do you need anything?"

"No. Thank you. I'm fine, Dr. Shepherd." She kept her voice as level as she could and took a step back away from him. "Thank you for offering."

Derek gave her that smug half smile. "You know what you need right now? To get your mind off of things? A surgery. I've got an E.T.S. this afternoon and you're scrubbing in."

Meredith warred briefly with herself. The surgery sounded great and normally she'd jump at the chance but…Bailey had her on scut and Meredith already knew she'd be distracted. Before she could choose her pager beeped and she pulled it up to see a page from the information desk downstairs. "You'd have to clear it with Bailey first. She's got me on scut and now you'll have to excuse me." She turned away and headed to the elevator to pick up Mark and give him Bailey's orders.

"Meredith," he called after her. "Meredith. Wait! I really need to talk to you."

She looked over her shoulder at him. "I don't have time now. I won't have time later. You lied to me. I don't want to talk to you. Talk to Bailey about the surgery. I have to go." She turned her head back and walked quickly to the elevators.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey, Angel," Mark said quietly as she walked up to the nurse's station and he opened his arms for her to burrow into his chest. "I'm here, baby girl. I'm here."

Meredith didn't answer she simply pulled his fresh, clean scent into her lungs and took some strength from his solid form. For endless minutes she simply breathed him in and let him hold her.

Up on the balcony overlooking the main hospital entrance Miranda Bailey watched the pair and smirked. He was good for her. This was going to be interesting. She loved telling her interns that she knew everything and she wasn't far off the mark. She might not know everything but it was damn close. And she knew that no matter how much those two protested that they were just friends that she was looking at forever right there. She loved it when people got their happy endings.

"What are you looking at, Miranda?" The chief leaned on the railing beside her.

Bailey immediately wiped the smug smile from her face and nodded her head down at the couple in front of the information desk. "You ever seen anything more perfect?"

Webber looked down and felt a pang in his chest. The tall, unfamiliar man was cradling little Meredith Grey in his arms as though she was the most precious thing in the world. He was carding a hand through her hair and rubbing her back with the other while they rocked together oblivious to the outside world. "No. No, I don't believe I have. The infamous Mark, I take it?" So maybe Meredith wasn't like Ellis. She'd had to have known earlier when she'd been speaking with his that Mark was on his way to her. Which meant that her assertion that she was fine was only slightly untrue. She should have said she'd _be_ fine.

"Yep," Bailey nodded and then she turned her head and gazed at him in calculation. "He's a plastic surgeon, you know? And he flew all the way to Seattle from New York just to see Grey. He came out here on a whim because he thought she might need him. Don't we have a position open in plastics? Head of the department or something?"

"Why Miranda Bailey," the chief smirked. "Are you seriously trying to get me to give Meredith Grey's boyfriend a job so that he'll stay here and make her smile?"

She smirked at him. "Would I really do that? I'm the Nazi, remember?"

"I do. And you're right. We do need a new head of plastics. I'll talk to him later. Find out his credentials and see if he's willing." He grinned down at the couple that had broken from their hug and were making their way to the elevators. "She never looked that happy with Shepherd, did she?"

"No. No she didn't." Bailey shook her head.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So scut today because mommy dearest decided to get sick?" Mark asked quietly as they waited for the elevator. "On top of everything else? You just can't catch a break."

The elevator dinged and people poured out of it before she could answer. They entered the small car together and Meredith pushed the proper button before leaning her back against Mark's hard chest. "Yeah. You're here though and that makes everything better."

"Does it?" He asked her in the same quiet tone. She was nearly sleeping against his chest and he couldn't stop the tender smile that creased his face. "Good."

The elevator dinged again and Meredith roused herself enough to stand up straight and grab his hand. She led him to the nurse's station and grabbed an armful of charts Bailey had left for her. "Come on. We'll go somewhere quiet and I can work on these."

He nodded and picked up the rest of the charts before following her slender form down the hallway and into an empty gallery. She took one of the seats and curled up before pulling one of the charts onto her knees and opening it.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Mark asked quietly a few minutes later.

She looked up from the chart and gave him a sad smile. "Not right now. Right now I just want to sit here in the silence and listen to you breathe while I do these charts. I do want to talk about all of it but I just…not now. Tonight. At home."

"Okay. I can deal with that. Just…I'm here right? And you said Cris wanted to borrow a shoulder and she can. It's fine with me. Two hot girls in my arms? Always fine with me."

She smacked him gently with one of the charts while she giggled at him. "Shut up." Still giggling she went back to her work.

"Hey Angel," he said a few minutes later. "I thought this O.R. was free today." He motioned to the sudden activity on the floor.

Meredith looked up for a moment before continuing to write. "It was. Must be an emergency case."

He watched the activity with interest for a few minutes longer. Then they brought the patient into the room and his eyes widened. "Angel. Angel!" He took the chart from her hands. "Cris is on the table. Go!"

Meredith scrambled to her feet and pressed against the glass. Bailey glanced up for a moment and motioned her down. Meredith nodded and then bolted from the room. Mark gathered the charts she'd abandoned together and followed her out. He'd run them by the nurse's desk before he wandered down to the cafeteria to wait for her.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith put the mask in front of her mouth and timidly walked into the O.R. "How is she?" She asked quietly. "Is it the baby?"

Three sets of eyes locked on hers. "You knew?" Two voices asked in unison as Addison calmly went back to work.

Meredith nodded slowly. "She told me a few days ago. I made her go jogging with me this morning. Did I…?"

Bailey left her place by Cristina's head and stood in front of Meredith. She pulled down her mask. "No. It started out this way. Nothing caused it to happen." She told the younger woman in a gentle voice. Meredith was feeling guilty and Bailey knew she shouldn't.

"You have to let me in there," Meredith nearly begged. "Please. I'm her person."

Bailey opened her mouth to argue but the door opened again. "Meredith," George said quietly. "Mer, I need you to come with me. Please? I know you want to stay with Cristina but—"

"My mother?" Meredith tore her eyes from Bailey. "What's wrong with my mom?"

"Just…we'll discuss this outside, please, Mer? They need to focus on Cristina and I need you to come with me."

Bailey shooed the pair out and returned to Cristina's head.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Where's Mark?" George asked before anything else could be said.

Meredith fumbled her phone out and checked it. "Cafeteria."

"Okay. We'll head there," George took her arm and led her down the hall. "I need you to sign for a needle biopsy, Mer."

Meredith stopped abruptly and put one hand to her forehead. "Cancer?"

"We don't know. C'mon. Cafeteria. You can sign the form on the way." George handed her the paperwork and she signed it in a trance. "C'mon Mer, I'll walk you down there."

"Meri!" A male voice called out from behind them. They turned slightly and Meredith's face drained just that little bit more. "You were supposed to come find out if you could scrub in with me." Derek gave her a charming smile. "Where have you been?"

Meredith shot an overwhelmed look at George and bolted. George pivoted and stood in front of a shocked Derek. "Don't follow her." He warned in a hard voice.

"O'Malley," Derek started but George cut him off.

"No." George moved in front of him again when Derek tried to dodge around him. "Let her go."

Alex walked up to the pair and watched in interest. He had no idea what was going on besides that George O'Malley was squaring off with Dr. Shepherd. He had the sinking feeling this had to do with Meredith. Couldn't Shepherd leave the poor girl alone?

"George, I just want to—"

"I don't care," George growled out. "Her mother might have liver cancer, her best friend is undergoing surgery and you're married. Leave her alone." George blocked him again and glared. "She doesn't need you trying to bribe her with surgeries or mess with her head anymore." Alex caught a glimpse of Meredith's retreating form and stood shoulder to shoulder with George blocking Derek from heading down the hallway. "You can get me cut from the program, you can make my life Hell but I'm not letting you pass me until Mer's gone. She's my friend. She needs time alone and you pursuing her is only hurting her more. Leave her alone."

Derek turned to Alex. "Karev, you know—"

Alex shook his head. He wasn't sure leaving Meredith by herself was such a great idea but he knew that Shepherd would only make it worse. "No. She's sorta my friend too. And you hurt her. I won't let you hurt her again. Let her go."

"You can back off boys," Tyler, one of the nurses told them. "She's vanished. Good luck finding her." He sneered a bit at Derek.

Derek fumed in impotent fury at them and stalked off.

Alex turned to George. "Where did she go, O'Malley?" He asked in a rush. "We have to go find her. She shouldn't be by herself."

George gave him a mild glare. "What do you care? Don't you have an E.T.S. to do?"

Alex rolled his eyes. "She's my friend too, you know? I'll give up the surgery if she needs someone to sit with her."

George's jaw nearly unhinged. "She's…" He cleared his throat. "She's fine. Mark's here. She was heading to the cafeteria. He's waiting for her there. You don't have to give up your surgery for her. It's cool that you would have though."

Alex just nodded and headed after Shepherd.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark was unprepared for the ball of sobbing female that crashed into him where he waited for Meredith in the cafeteria but he pulled her closer to his chest anyway. "Ah, Angel. What's wrong? Shh, baby girl. Just tell me what's wrong. I've got you."

Meredith tried to draw in a breath to tell him but only ended up sobbing harder. She shook her head and then buried it in his chest and just let go. Mark adjusted her on his lap and dug out her phone.

_Taking Meredith home. Will be back in the morning. She's hit her limit. Call if anything happens with her mom or Cris please. Keys for her jeep are probably in her locker and I don't think she'll mind if George or Izzie drive it home._

He texted the message to Bailey, Izzie, George and Alex. He knew he might get in trouble for this but didn't think anyone would have a problem with Mer. He really hoped they didn't cuz then he might just have to break his hand on someone's face.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith was barely aware of Mark carrying her out of the hospital and to his rented car. She knew she should be embarrassed about her breakdown but she just didn't have the energy. Besides, Mark was there and Mark would do the best he could for her. He always had.

She knew that there were things that she should be doing. Getting the results of her mother's biopsy. Checking in on Cristina. But she wasn't sure she could handle anymore tonight.

She blinked as Mark set her down in the seat and crouched next to her to fasten the seatbelt. "H...Hey," she croaked out.

He looked up and smiled that soft, beautiful smile that he only ever gave to her. "There you are. Better?"

She nodded a bit miserably. "Except for the headache and eyes, yeah. Where are we going?"

"Home." He stood up and shut the door before bolting around the car through the rain and jumping inside.

"But," Meredith started weakly. "I have to…Mom's biopsy and Cristina."

"The others will let us know if they need anything. I promise. I told them I was taking you home. No one objected, not even Bailey."

She gave a watery laugh. "Did you give them a chance to object?"

He shrugged one shoulder and pulled out of the lot. "They could have texted me at any time, Angel. They didn't. That means no objections and you're going home and going to sleep."

"Okay." She conceded and then closed her eyes and let the motions of the car lull her to sleep.


	13. Conversations

**Disclaimer: Not mine. You know what would happen if they were.**

**Conversations**

It was the lack of a warm body cradling her own that woke her. The sun hadn't even risen yet and she was cold. She blinked slowly and tried to burrow under the covers and scoot into the lukewarm spot Mark had left in her bed. It didn't help much. She blinked again and glared over at the clock. Catching sight of the red numerals that read 4:53, she bolted upright and scrambled from the bed. "Crap! I'm late! Again. I'm going to be in soooo much trouble."

"Relax, Angel," Mark's low morning voice floated from the doorway. "Bailey excused all of her interns from rounds. You don't have to be in until seven. She also said that Cristina's fine and your mom will be released soon."

"Oh thank God!" Meredith groaned and flopped backwards on the bed. Then she scented the air and pulled in a deep breath. "Do I smell coffee?"

Mark laughed at her antics. Sometimes she was just too cute. Her flop had landed her on her back with her body crosswise across the bed and her feet and head dangling off the edges. "Angel you live in a house full of surgeons. There's always coffee. Grab a shower before Izzie and George get up and I'll bring you a cup."

Meredith grinned up at him from where her head hung over the side of the bed. "You're the greatest, Marky."

"I know," he bowed and then backed out of the room to fetch her coffee.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Morning," Izzie stumbled into the kitchen in her t-shirt and famous Hello Kitty underwear an hour later. "Coffee?"

"In the pot," Mark answered with a grin and a lecherous look. "Angel you should really make sure all the coffee mugs are on the top shelf." He never removed his eyes from the form on display as he munched on his toast. The day before he'd stayed in bed with Meredith until the others were gone. He hadn't wanted to deal with other people.

It had been a quiet day. He and Meredith, well more Meredith than him, had slept through most of it and had watched some show on TV in the evening. He couldn't remember a thing about it. George and Izzie had come in and told him Bailey's instructions while Meredith slept with her head in his lap. It had been nice. The day had reminded him some of when he would visit her at Dartmouth after her finals or mid-terms. She would sleep the sleep of the dead and he would just hold her.

Izzie gave him a halfhearted glare for his stare as she poured her coffee and collapsed next to Meredith. She snagged a piece of toast from Meredith's plate and took a bite. "Pervert." She accused around her mouthful.

Mark grinned unrepentantly. "You know it."

Meredith rolled her eyes at them both before turning to Izzie. "Did you bring my car home?"

Izzie nodded and sipped at her coffee.

"Any idea why your chief wants to speak with me?" Mark asked the two women. They shook their heads at him in unison and he sighed. "Well I have a meeting set up with him at eight so I'll come find you when I'm done, yeah?" He asked Meredith.

She grinned at him. "Check Cristina's room first. We'll all congregate there anytime we can today."

He nodded. "Figured on that."

George stumbled blindly to the coffee pot with his eyes closed. He dug out a mug, poured himself a cup of coffee and slumped down in a chair next to Mark all without ever opening his eyes. He mumbled something that could have been a good morning and sipped at his coffee.

"That's talent," Mark grinned. "Have you even opened your eyes yet, George?"

"No. I don't need to," George slurred out and drank a full mouthful of coffee. "Izzie's running around in her underwear and Mer's wearing her Dartmouth T-shirt and I really don't care what you're wearing and the coffee pot hasn't moved since I moved in. I don't need eyes to get around this house which is good because I can't see yet anyway. Easier to just let it be dark. Dark is good."

Izzie and Meredith giggled while Mark chuckled until George's hand snaked out and stole a piece of his toast. "Hey!"

George's eyes finally opened a bit and he regarded Mark with a sleepy smirk. "We're surgeons, Sloan. Fast hands and hungry stomachs. You don't want one of us stealing your food watch it better."

"God I'm surrounded by kindergartners with scalpels," Mark muttered and finished off his other piece of toast.

"Nope," Meredith grinned. "Kindergartners share. It's in the rule book. We're like high schoolers with scalpels. Which is a scary thought. We've got all the gossip mongering and the unfocused rage and the hormones. We could kill someone without trying if they piss us off. And just be grateful that they like you. They never stole Derek's food."

Izzie shuddered. "Who would want to steal Museli? That's just nasty in the first place. Now Lucky Charms? Sweet and sugary? Oh yeah. That I'd steal."

"Mmm," George moaned. "Corn Pops. The cereal of champions."

Meredith giggled again. "Mark likes Cocoa Puffs."

Mark banged his head on the table as Izzie and George both grinned at him. "Angel likes Fruity Pebbles," he attacked back.

"I make no denial for that," she grinned and patted his head. She stuffed the last of her toast in her mouth and stood up. "Who's turn is it to do the shopping?" She asked.

"Mine," Mark picked his head up and glared the other two interns down. "I'm staying here for now so it's my turn."

"You're a visitor, a guest," Meredith protested weakly but then nodded when his glare transferred to her. "Fine but don't forget the tampons." She teased.

Mark grimaced a bit but nodded without argument. "Give me your lists before you leave and I'll pick up whatever is needed."

"Grocery money is in the box above the coat rack. I'm going to get dressed." She kissed Mark's forehead and left the room. The other two interns eyed him for a moment and then wandered slowly after her for showers and dressing. Mark grinned. This was going to be interesting. They were fun people and he did like them. Maybe he should ask Richard Webber for a job. He'd think about it. He'd think hard about it. There was nothing left for him in New York and Meredith was here. She was literally all he had left. The Shepherd's had taken Derek's side as they should and now would no longer even talk to him. Yeah, Seattle was sounding better and better.

Addison and Derek's presence never even entered his mind as he sat at Meredith's kitchen table pondering the future.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

_The night before…_

She stared at the drink in front of her. If she looked at it just right it looked like gin. Didn't matter that it was actually club soda. She knew it was club soda but she pretended that if was gin. It made it a bit easier.

She paid no attention to the man that sat on the stool beside her until he spoke. "Where did she go? I know you know where she went when she bolted away from me like I was the devil come to take her soul."

"Joe," she sighed. "Do I look friendly to you?"

"Oh, you're a tiny little kitten of joy and love," Joe grinned at her. She just stared at him. Even Joe wasn't immune to the Bailey stare. "What?" He whined. "He saved my life."

"His first mistake," Bailey grumbled and then turned to glare at Derek. "McDreamy, go sit by someone who cares." She ordered.

Derek gave a harsh laugh and studied his drink for a moment. "Everything's going to be fine," he finally said with that cocky smirk. "Addison will go back to New York, Meredith and I will start over. Everything's going to be fine, right?" He turned to her.

Bailey's jaw nearly dropped at his obliviousness. "You so damn stupid," she told him. She'd seen Mark and Meredith in the lobby. She had the text that Mark had sent when he decided it was time for Meredith to take a time out. There was no way on God's green Earth that man was going to let Derek Shepherd have another chance to hurt her.


	14. Deny, Deny, Deny

**Disclaimer: Still not mine. Promise. Damn creators creating better stories than me. **

**Deny, Deny, Deny**

Last night's strange meeting with Derek Shepherd was still on Miranda's mind as she led her interns through the corridors deciding where to send them. That man was an idiot but he'd learn eventually. It was going to be a hard lesson but he'd get reality shoved in his face soon enough. She just hoped she got to watch it. Miranda Bailey had never said she wasn't vindictive and he'd hurt her intern, her baby. No one did that with impunity. No one. "I want everyone focused today. With Cristina out we're down an intern and I have a feelin' it's gonna be one of those days." Alex stood at her shoulder trying to get a peek at the assignments. The other three trailed behind them huddled together and whispering. She knew they were listening to her at the same time so didn't comment on it…yet. "And, Karev, see the chief by the end of the day."

"What for?" He asked in a surprised tone.

She shot him a glare. "Do I look psychic to you? He's the chief. He asked, you go."

Meredith turned to look at George. "What did he do now?" She asked him quietly. She might not like Alex much but like she'd told everyone the first day he was one of them.

"Maybe he gave the chief syphilis," George told her with a happy note to his voice.

Meredith gave a quiet chuckle and shook her head at him. "Mean. Dr. Webber wouldn't cheat on his wife, George."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Thank you for meeting with me, Dr. Sloan," Richard Webber stood and offered his hand to the tall, good-looking young man across his desk.

Mark took the offered hand and gave the chief a questioning smile. "Not a problem, Chief Webber."

"Have a seat," Richard offered. The two men sat and Richard folded his hands on his desk and gave Mark a long look. "I know that I can't offer you as much as you get paid in New York and I know that Seattle isn't anywhere near as prestigious. However, I'd like to offer you a job as our Head of Plastics, Dr. Sloan."

Mark settled back in his chair and regarded the older man soberly. "Before I answer I need to be honest with you. You no doubt know that Meredith Grey and I are close friends?" He waited for Richard's nod. "We've had an…intimate relationship in the past and if I were to move to Seattle we would probably start that relationship again. You need to know that and know that I'll favor her and her friends outrageously. Not because of mine and Mer's relationship, or not totally. They're good, they're actually pretty excellent."

"Yes, they are," Richard interrupted with a nod. "That's why they're Bailey's. She's my best resident. I give her the interns with the most promise or the troublemakers. The two seem to go hand-in-hand. Everyone favors those five. Because they are the best."

"Good. Then we're clear on that issue. There's one other thing you should know. Derek Shepherd and I were best friends back in New York—"

"And you slept with Addison," Richard interrupted again. "I knew that before I offered the job. I don't really care about your life before here. Not as the Chief anyway. As the Chief I only care that you're an excellent surgeon and that you've been complaining for months that you want more than boob jobs." He grinned at Mark's dumbfounded look. "I made a few calls." He admitted. "I can promise you the plastics jobs that are more than just making someone prettier than they think they are."

Mark grinned. "Thank you. I think we can come to terms in that case. Really, Chief, thank you. Shall we negotiate my contract?"

Richard frowned. "One last thing and then we will. This is not the Chief of Surgery speaking now. This is coming from the man that changed Meredith Grey's diapers and rocked her to sleep while her mother tried to work herself to death. Derek Shepherd hurt her. Don't let it happen again. I don't care that you're sleeping with her. Well, I do. But I can see how she lights up around you and how much you care about her so I don't care that you're in a relationship with an intern. Do not let Shep hurt her again. And don't hurt her yourself. It's not just me that will be after your ass if you do."

Mark's smile dimmed and Richard felt his heart stall for a moment as he wondered if he's scared him off. "She really did love him then," Mark murmured. "Dammit. I'd been hoping she hadn't."

Richard felt his heart restart. "No. At least I don't think so. He lied. He lied to her and that's what hurt her. She can't stand lies like that."

Mark slumped back in his chair. "Oh. I knew that. I should have thought of that. She doesn't really like any kind of lies but relationship ones are the worst." He nodded and then leaned forward. "I can't promise to never hurt her, Dr. Webber. But I can promise that I'll never leave her. No matter what happens between us I'll always be there for her and I'll always be her friend. Now about that contract?"

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey, Cris," Mark said softly as he entered her hospital room. "How you feeling? And where is everyone today?"

Cristina glared at him. "Off having fun and doing surgeries and being doctors while I'm stuck here being bored. What do you want, McSteamy?"

"Who is this, Cristina?" An older female voice asked from by the window in a slight Korean accent.

Mark turned towards the voice and was met with an older Korean woman with a bright smile. Cristina's glare transferred to the woman. "Mother meet Mark Sloan, he's a friend. Just a friend, so don't start. He's my friend Meredith's whatever. Mark meet my mother." Cristina said grudgingly.

Mark smiled one of his charming, innocent smiles and shook the woman's hand. "Speaking of…" he turned back to Cristina. "Do you know where Mer is? I have to run back to the house and I wanted to check on her before I went."

"I saw her earlier," Cristina said in a less angry tone. "She was in here for rounds. I think she's with Bailey today."

"Thanks Cris," Mark said and then took her hand in his and gave it a squeeze. "Get better okay? Don't make me worry about you again."

Cristina grinned. "You're such a sap, Sloan," she accused. "Go. Find Mer."

Mark chuckled. "Going, slave driver. I can't wait to see you with your own interns. It'll be fun." He sent her mother one more smile and headed out.

"All the doctors in this hospital are so handsome. I see why you like it here," her mother said in an admiring tone. "Are you sure he's not the father?"

Cristina rolled her eyes and scowled at her mother. "Ugh, Mom don't be gross. He's Mer's."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You skipping rounds today?" Derek asked from behind her as she stood outside her mother's room.

"Avoiding Mother," she answered grumpily.

"Oh," he said inanely. He really didn't know what to say to that. Sometimes Meredith made absolutely no sense to him. He hadn't been expecting her to answer with the truth. She was supposed to realize that he was teasing her and respond accordingly. He reached out to take her arm but she stepped away from him.

"You have a wife," she pointed out. "And we're not an us."

"Addison's leaving," he announced suddenly as thought that would make up for the lies and the pain he'd caused. "She doesn't have any more patients in this hospital. There's no reason for her to be here."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "No reason?" She scoffed. "I don't care what she does. I don't care what you do. As long as it's away from me. Unless it's surgery. Then I care. Because I am a surgeon. A good one."

Derek ignored the rest of her rambling and focused only on the question. "None whatsoever," he assured her. He reached forward to stroke her cheek and she stepped back again.

"Well, isn't this cozy?" Addison observed as she came upon the two of them. She saw Meredith's irritation and Derek's soulful look. "Can I join in, or are you not into threesomes?" She joked and pressed the button for the elevator.

Meredith didn't turn around to look at her savior. "I have to go," she told Derek knowing he wouldn't try to keep her there with Addison standing right behind her.

He tried anyway but only said her name as she swept past him.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey Angel," Mark grinned when she finally answered her phone. "Whatcha been doin'? I've been looking all over for you."

"Running labs, getting a CT for a cystic fibrosis patient, trying to dodge Derek," she answered with a laugh. "You know the usual. Why? What did you need me for?"

"Ah, always fun. Anyway, I have to run back to the house and make some phone calls and e-mails. Can't use the hospital computers since I don't work here and I left my laptop back at the house this morning. I'll be a couple of hours." He explained to her.

"Okay." She answered cheerfully. "If you're back by lunch then we'll probably be in Cristina's room. Check with her if you're not back by lunch."

"Sure. Later, Angel."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith shook her head after Addison left the room. So much for her going back to New York. Seriously she didn't mind the other woman staying in Seattle. She just disliked it that Derek had lied to her again.

"Meri, there you are," Derek said as he passed her on the stairs. "Are you avoiding me?"

"No," she said shortly. "I'm busy, Dr. Shepherd. I'm an intern. I'm always busy." She faced him with an angry expression. She was really starting to feel a bit stalked.

He ignored her expression and smiled at her. She was cute when she was irritated. "So, how about that dinner we never got to have? Friday?"

She scowled furiously. "You have a wife," she reminded him. "And I don't do the dirty mistress thing. Ever."

He gave her a confused look. "Addie's leaving, Meri. I promise."

Meredith rolled her eyes at him. "You can stop lying, Dr. Shepherd. I really don't care. Even if she was I still wouldn't go out with you on Friday. And I already know she's not leaving. She's helping Bailey with a cystic fibrosis case."

Derek frowned. "Just because she offered her services, doesn't mean she intends to stay."

"I don't care what you think it means," Meredith said shortly. "I don't even care what it really means. Just stop." She turned away from him at the bottom of the stairs and hurried away.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I know you're busy and making phone calls and probably dealing with irate patients and stuff but George lost my mother! He lost her. She's wandering the hospital thinking she's still a doctor!" Meredith shouted.

"Calm down, Angel." He told her. "It'll be okay. No matter what else she was your mother was an excellent doctor. Everyone knows who she is so they'll humor her and take her back to her room."

"So not the point, Mark."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Where is everyone?" Mark asked Tyler as he stood by the nurse's desk.

"Grey, Karev, and Stevens are in surgeries. Well, Stevens is doing an echo. O'Malley's trying to find the older Grey…again and Yang is running around doing anything she can to stay out of bed."

Mark shared a laugh with the tall man. "Never a dull moment around here, is there?"

"Nope. It'll be even better when you start." The tall black man grinned companionably.

"How'd you find out? I haven't told anyone."

"Patricia over heard and that woman is the biggest gossip this hospital has ever seen but don't tell anyone I said that."

"Right." Mark nodded and made a note to make friends with her and to avoid saying anything he wanted to keep under wraps anywhere around her. "I'll go wait by Cristina's room. I'm sure they'll all show up there sooner or later. Don't tell any of them about the move yeah? I wanna tell them myself."

"Sure thing, Doc. Welcome aboard." The two men shook hands and Mark wandered down the hall to Cristina's room.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith scrubbed at her hands. Jeremiah was gone. She didn't know how to take this one. Bailey had broken down. Bailey. It was inconceivable. Bailey had always seemed so strong and unaffected. She hated that Jeremiah's death had hit Bailey so hard.

Addison leaned on the sink beside her after murmuring some soothing words that Meredith couldn't hear to Bailey. "Meredith," she said quietly.

Meredith looked away from the O.R. and to the defeated form beside her. "Yes?" She asked gently.

Addison looked down at her fingers, playing with her rings. "It's hard to accept the end when you're too close," Addison said quietly. Meredith silently watched her replace the rings on her finger. Addison sighed. "Look, I don't want someone who doesn't want me, Meredith, but if there's the slightest chance that he does…then I'm not leaving Seattle."

Meredith looked away for a moment. "Addison," she said calmly. "I don't want him. Seriously. I have this thing about lies. And he keeps lying. If you want him. Stay. Don't worry that you're hurting me. Do what your heart tells you is best. He can't hurt me anymore. And neither can you. I simply don't care as long as it doesn't involve me."

Addison gave her a slow nod of understanding and walked from the room.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith took Mark's hand in her own. "Let's go tell Cristina good night and then we can head back to the house," she told him softly.

"Sure," Mark nodded.

Meredith's pager beeped and she growled lowly before pulling it out and checking it. Her eyes widened. "Cris," she breathed out in horror. She bolted for her best friend's room Mark's long legs easily keeping pace. "What's going on?" She burst out as they came through the door side by side.

Mark stared astonished at the woman on the bed, Meredith speechless beside him. Cristina sat on the end of her bed tears streaming down her face. Izzie and George were huddled against the wall watching helplessly. Her mother sat unconcerned on the sofa under the window. "Cris?" He asked gently.

"I can't stop," Cristina sobbed wretchedly. "I can't. I can't stop."

"Crying," Izzie clarified. "She can't stop crying."

Meredith glared at Izzie and George. "I can see that." She spat. "What did you guys do to her?"

Mark put a hand on Meredith's back as Izzie and George protested the accusation. "She's finally allowed herself to react, Angel," he told her quietly.

Meredith nodded her understanding and gave Izzie and George another glare for not comforting Cristina. She took two steps toward the sobbing woman before Izzie and George pulled her away. "No!" They yelled. "I already tried that," Izzie explained. "It only makes it worse."

Mark ignored them all and stood beside the bed as Cris' mother told them how she knew her daughter would break sooner or later. He wasn't sure he liked this woman who seemed to be ignoring her daughter's pain as she had all day.

"I will kill her!" Cristina proclaimed loudly through her sobs. He slowly put one hand on Cristina's shoulder. She batted it away and sobbed even harder.

Meredith started to hustle the older woman out the door. "I am her mother," she protested.

"We don't do well with mothers here," Meredith told her. "Why don't you leave and come back later?"

Mark now stood huddled with Izzie and George against the wall. George helplessly held out a tissue to Cristina and she snatched it from him. "Cristina," Meredith tried to get her attention.

"Make—make it stop," Cristina begged Meredith. "Make it stop." She drew in a sobbing breath as George tried to hand her another tissue. "Somebody sedate me!" She screamed.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You okay?" Mark asked her as she settled into the car beside him. "That was…I don't even know what that was."

Meredith turned her head and gave him a small smile. "Yeah. She'll be okay. Sorry she rejected your shoulder. I happen to think it was her loss."

"Yeah. It was." Mark gave her that cocky smirk that she claimed to hate. "So other than Cris how was your day?"

"We lost Jeremiah. Damn. Wasn't supposed to use his name. But it makes me sad. He had cystic fibrosis. He was 26. And a triathlon runner. He was so positive about things and I hate that he didn't make it." He didn't say anything just took her hand in his and held it as they drove through the darkened streets. "And Addison gave Derek divorce papers today. He hasn't signed them yet and he expects me to care. He kept cornering me. I don't get it."

"Maybe he really does love you," Mark suggested and hid the pain behind his normal mask. "Maybe he wants to make it work with you."

She shook her head and laced her fingers more tightly between his. "No. He doesn't. Or if he does then he doesn't love me enough. He doesn't want the parts of me that aren't bright and shiny and new and innocent. He only sees what he wants to see. He loves the idea of me. But I'm a real person and I have days where everything is dark and dreary and sad for no good reason. I have days where everything is just so overwhelming and hard. He doesn't want those days. He wants the days where I can't stop smiling and everything looks brand new. I can't be that person all the time. I don't think anyone can. And Addison does want him and she does love him and he's hurting her because she made a mistake. A big one. But still only a mistake and at the end of the day I can't forgive him for being that unforgiving. For being that petty. He'll never forgive you and even if he does go back to her he'll never forgive her either. Not really."

Mark brought her hand up to his lips and laid them on the back of it. "When did you grow up and get wise?"

Meredith laughed. "We all have our moments."

They drove in silence for a few more blocks. "I'm leaving in the morning." He told her suddenly.

Meredith drew in a sharp breath. "Oh. Right. Okay."

Mark grinned at her defeated voice. "I'll be back soon though. Like a week or so. For good."

She stared at his profile in shock, her eyes big and so green. "You're moving here?"

"I've accepted the Head of Plastic Surgery at Seattle Grace and I start in two weeks."

"Seriously? You're serious? Is that enough time to sell your practice and inform your patients and everything. What about your apartment? Your car?" Meredith babbled all in one breath.

Mark chuckled and pulled into her drive. "My practice is already sold. That's what I've been working on for the past few weeks. Ever since you asked me to come after the Derek thing. I just felt like it was the right thing then and I'm even more sure now. I hate all the rain but it's not so bad. And there's really good coffee and friends here so yeah…I'm moving here."

Meredith unbuckled her seatbelt and threw herself across the small space and into his arms. "That's great! I'm so glad."

He wrapped his arms around her and just breathed in her lavender scent for a moment before helping her from the car and up the steps to the front door. "Can I stay here til I find my own place when I get back?"

She looked at him soberly for a moment. "Mark. If that's what you want. Personally? You can stay here forever. I like having you around."

Mark grinned. "Meredith Grey, are you asking me to move in with you?"

Meredith shook her head in fond exasperation at him as she unlocked the door. "Yes. Just no sex in my bed unless it's with me. Got it?"

Mark chuckled. "Of course." He didn't tell her he wasn't going to be having sex with anyone not her. She was smart. She'd figure it out soon enough. "Okay then. I'll stay until you kick me out."

"Good."


	15. Bring the Pain

**Disclaimer: Not mine. Still. Seriously.**

**Bring the Pain**

"So…I'll see you in a week then?" Meredith leaned into Mark's chest as they stood near the gate for his plane back to New York.

"Yeah," he murmured and kissed her forehead. "Call me? Anytime. I don't care if I'm asleep. I don't care if you're going nuts and ready to neuter someone. Just call me."

Meredith giggled and stretched up to capture his lips with hers. For a moment he was motionless and then he pulled her into him and covered her lips with his won and buried a hand in the hair at the back of her head. His tongue traced the seam of her lips until she parted them and he plunged their depths. He mapped out every part of the inside of her mouth before retreating and allowing her to explore his own.

After long minutes of bliss they finally parted. "What were we saying?" She asked him breathlessly. "God you can kiss."

"Yeah, that was…wow," he agreed. "Um…right so…a week. Yeah. Call me?"

Meredith giggled again and hugged him. "Did I scramble your brains, Dr. Sloan?"

"Think so," he muttered into the top of her head. "I'm going to miss you."

"You're coming back though. Which is great. But you're right I'll miss you too. Have a safe flight and call me when you get there?" She lifted her head from his chest and stared up into his blue eyes.

"Yeah. I will." The PA announced his flight. "I gotta go. That's my plane."

"Okay. I'll see you and I'll call you." She gave him one last squeeze and then watched his tall form disappear into the crowd.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith followed Bailey from the locker room with a harsh glare at Alex that he didn't notice. Seriously? What kind of guy doesn't follow through? What was wrong with him?

Bailey caught the glare and turned to George. "What's that about?"

"Hunh?" George stuttered. "Oh. Mark went home. She's not in the best mood and Izzie and Alex had a date that didn't go so well. So Mer's mad at him for her."

"Do I need to put her on scut today?" Bailey asked quietly with a worried look at Meredith.

"Oh no. She'll be fine. He'll be back in a week. He's moving here. Taking over plastic and stuff. She's just a bit off. She'll be fine to work." George didn't think Meredith would be irritated with him for spilling things that weren't actually secret.

"Good." Bailey nodded and started rapping out instructions.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Meredith," Derek said happily.

Meredith only smoothed out her face into her most bland expression. "Your wife is looking for you," she told him.

Derek sighed and rolled his eyes. "This is hard for me, Meredith," he complained.

She crossed her arms over her chest and stared him down. "Well, let me make it easy for you then. You need to stop. I've told you: I'm not going to be that woman. You know the one who breaks up a marriage or begs you to want me. I have no interest in you as a man. Only as an attending and an excellent neurosurgeon. You can sign the divorce papers or not. That's your choice and it has nothing to do with me. Even if you sign them and call yourself free. I'm no longer available."

Derek's mouth opened and then closed it. His nostrils flared. "You have a new boyfriend already?"

Meredith frowned at him. "My personal life is none of your business, Dr. Shepherd. And no I don't have a new boyfriend." Mark was technically an old boyfriend. "Now where's this patient I'm supposed to be helping you with?"

Derek stared at her for a moment longer wondering if she was lying. He hooked a thumb over his shoulder. "Down there."

She nodded and headed towards the patient's room leaving him to follow her.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I really hate Derek Shepherd. Seriously. He asked for me on his service today. Stupid boy penis. I really hate him and I expect you to save me when you come home. Seriously. I think I'd rather work plastics than be stuck with his puppy dog eyes and wounded expression. Cris gets the porn king and I get the puppy dog look. Life sucks and you haven't even been gone two hours. Call me back when you land. Love you."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith followed Derek up the stairs while he shot out instructions like bullets. She committed them to memory.

"Look do you need me for anything else work related?" She asked him when he wound down.

He gave out a harsh breath as though she had offended him. "Look, I was married for eleven years. Addison is my family." He stepped closer to her and she fought off the urge to take a step back. What the Hell had brought this on? She only wanted to go check on her mom and had thought that he was finished with her for now. "That is eleven Thanksgivings, eleven birthdays and eleven Christmases, and in one day I'm supposed to sign a piece of paper and end my family? A person doesn't do that—not without a little hesitation."

She closed her eyes and prayed for patience. "Dr. Shepherd," she started.

"I'm entitled to a little uncertainty here," he ranted. "Just a moment to understand the magnitude of what it means to cut somebody out of my life."

_You cut Mark out of your life without any hesitation at all_, she thought peeved at his intolerance. "Dr. Shepherd," she tried again letting some of her anger filter into her voice.

"I'm entitled to at least one moment…" His voice grew louder and a door slammed somewhere above them. He forcefully lowered his voice. "Of painful doubt. And a little understanding from you would be nice." He glared at her and stormed off.

Meredith stared after him, taken aback. She shook her head in disgust. "Then don't sign them," she called after him. "I told you I don't care either way."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"What do you know about Hmong?" He could hear the note of frustrated anger in her voice as he juggled his laptop, suitcase and phone for a moment.

"What?" He asked confused.

"Patient with a spinal tumor." She explained a bit more calmly. "Her father said no surgery today. She agreed even though she doesn't need his consent. She says she's Hmong and he's the elder. What is that?"

"I have no idea." He rolled his eyes. "Why would I? And my flight was fine, thanks."

"No your flight was crappy." She refuted. "And you've discovered that you hate New York and you can't wait to get back home. And you would know because you know all sorts of useless trivia. Only it's not useless this time. I really need to know."

"True on both counts." He acknowledged. "But won't do you any good this time because I have no idea what Hmong is, Angel. Is this for Derek's case?"

"Yep." She nodded. "He pushed all the research and discharge stuff and social services stuff on me because he wants a moment of painful doubt about signing his divorce papers and I'm not giving him the support he needs. McAss. I don't care if he gets a divorce or not. Why would I?" She huffed crossly.

"I'm sorry, Angel." He empathized. "I'll see what I can find out for you about Hmong though and call you back."

"Good. Thanks. God, I miss you already. Hurry up and get back here."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Internet is out because of the storm. You get anything on the Hmong yet?" She asked him quickly.

"Still looking." He said with a note of apology in his voice.

"Okay. Sorry to bug you so much." She apologized. "Just…Cris won't take her pain meds and Izzie is mad at Alex for not kissing her and George and Alex are stuck in an elevator with a GSW to the chest and I'd like to be able to save one patient today. Just one. But the power's flickering and the generator isn't working right. And my mom's still here and she's restrained so she doesn't go running off again." She rambled.

"Don't worry, Angel, we'll save your patient." He promised her. "And Derek will be back to thinking you're perfect soon enough. Can't say I blame him. You are perfect."

"Mark." She growled in a truly angry tone. He gulped. He hadn't meant to really make her mad. He'd only been teasing. Derek must have really been bothering her today. "Don't piss me off today. I don't care what he thinks. I just wish he'd leave the personal stuff at the door and at least attempt to be professional with me."

Mark snorted derisively. Derek wouldn't know professional if it walked up and bit him. "Good luck with that."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Ha!" She taunted. "I figured out the problem and I didn't even need your help after all. She needs a shaman to help retrieve one of her—"

"Souls." He finished with her. "Yeah. I just found the information. How'd you find out?"

"I asked." She boasted. "Cuz I'm smart that way."

"So now all you need is a shaman. Not exactly in the Yellow Pages though. Want me to look for one out there for you?"

"Dr. Shepherd is taking care of that…when he isn't avoiding Addison anyway. She's been looking for him all day. Speaking of…when I get the chance I'm telling her about you. Don't say it. I know she's going to freak but she should have some forewarning if only to keep an eye on Derek." She reasoned to try and bring him on board with her plan.

Mark chuckled. "I wasn't going to protest, Angel. Me and Addie are okay. We parted on tentatively good terms. She'll understand why I'm moving when you tell her." He assured her.

"Good." Meredith sighed out a breath in relief. "Because I don't want her all pissy because of us. She's a good person and an excellent doctor and I think we could be friends if it weren't for all the Derek stuff."

"Me too." He agreed. Though he wasn't sure he wanted Addie and Angel to be friends. They knew too much and they were both too likely to tease the Hell out of him. Together he wouldn't stand a chance against them.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Looks like I get to save my one patient today. Dr. Shepherd is flying in the Shaman for the patient to have the healing ritual in the hospital." She told him happily.

"Maybe he's finally pulling his head from his ass then. Good. And why are you calling him Dr. Shepherd?" He wondered if this was some weird idea of hers to try and get over him.

"Yep. And I'm calling him Dr. Shepherd because one: that's his name and two: I'm trying to keep things professional." She explained in a duh voice. "At least on my end. I figure the more I distance him then the more he'll leave me alone."

Mark decided not to tell her that it would never work. Derek would only see it as her playing hard to get. Reality was going to bite Derek in the ass and he hoped he got to see it.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Is Burke seriously talking Alex and George through heart surgery while they're stuck in an elevator?" Mark yelped.

"That's the story anyway," she confirmed. "They were transporting a patient when the power went out."

"Damn," he whistled. "That's just…damn. Tell them to give me the gory details tonight, yeah? That's something else."

"I will," she promised. "I want to hear them myself. We'll call you tonight when we get home."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"He's making me crazy again." She pouted to him.

"Why am I not surprised?" He asked sarcastically.

"Mark." She groaned.

"What?" He asked in mock surprise. "Should I be jealous?"

"Don't be an ass." She blew him a raspberry. "I don't love him and I won't. And he doesn't love me. He says these things and he acts all sweet and caring and stuff and then he looks at her like she's the only bright spot in his life. I can't understand it and it's bugging the Hell out of me. What does he want from me?" She whined.

"I have no idea with him anymore, Angel." He sighed in despair. "I only know what I want from you."

"And what's that?" She asked him in a flirty tone.

She could hear Mark taking a deep breath and slowly releasing it. "Whatever you'll give me. That's all I want. Anything. Everything. Somewhere in between. Just whatever you can and will give me."

She closed her eyes against the tears. She felt like she had been waiting her whole life to hear just those words. "Yeah. Me too."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

She stood next to him watching the healing ritual. She crossed her arms over her chest and really hoped that this worked. Anna believed it would. She watched her. She watched the Shaman. Waiting. Waiting for something to happen.

And then she saw it. Anna looked directly at her and there was something different in her brown eyes. Something more. Something whole.

In that moment, when her eyes met Anna's, she knew. She just knew. All the confusion that she'd been suppressing drained away. All the pain went with it. And she knew. She knew what she wanted and she knew what she needed. She slipped a hand in her pocket and walked down the hall to make a quick phone call.

"Everything. I will give you everything." She whispered in an awed tone.

"Everything." He answered just as softly. "We're in this. We're going to have our everything and our forever and we won't look back."

"A lifetime of tomorrows."

"A lifetime of tomorrows."


	16. Bonding

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy isn't mine. Sorry.**

**Bonding**

She walked through the now quiet hospital corridors towards the NICU. She had been burning to talk to Addison all day and now she finally had her chance. She gave a soft knock on the door to Addison's office. "Addison? Can we talk for a moment?"

"Meredith?" The red head popped up and she frowned. "I was just leaving. Can it wait until tomorrow? I still haven't found Derek yet today."

Meredith passed through the door and shut it behind her. "No. It can't wait. Well I guess it could but I feel like I'm lying to you and I hate liars. Really hate them. And I can't lie to save my life and I have something really important to tell you and…"

Addison fell back against her chair and her face paled. "Oh my God," she gasped out and her eyes lowered to Meredith's stomach. "You're…"

Meredith's eyes flew wide. "What? No. No I'm not, Addison. God no. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. It's not that."

Addison drew in a sobbing breath and raised a shaky hand to her chest. "Okay. Okay. That's good? Right? It's good? Because you don't…and Derek…and it's good?"

Meredith couldn't stop the small giggle at Addison's reaction. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't laugh. It was just…and your face? Oh man. Sorry. I'm stopping. Really. I'm sorry. That wasn't what I wanted to talk to you about. And I'm not now nor do I ever plan to have Derek's child."

"Oh. Okay." Addison drew in another deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. Her eyes caught on Meredith's when they reopened and she nodded. "Okay. I'm ready. What did you need, Meredith?"

Meredith settled into a chair across from the other woman and folded her hands in her lap to try and still the fidgeting. "I've given myself orders to tell you before you find out for yourself. It's nothing to do with Derek. I promise. Well, not really. Though he plays a part in it, for you anyway. Not for me. I don't want to be with Derek and that's not the issue. And…dammit. Crap! This is difficult. And I want us to be friends. Because you're nice and kind and pretty and I think we'd like each other if we had the chance and I just know this is going to make you mad and I don't want you to be mad and he said you wouldn't be but you will—"

A slim long fingered hand covered her own. Meredith looked up to find that Addison had moved and was now sitting beside her. "Meredith. You're rambling and I can't understand what you're trying to say," the older woman told her gently. "Take a deep breath and slow down and tell me what it is."

Meredith followed her instructions and took a deep breath. "I'm not really sure how to say this gently. So I'll just say it. I have a nickname. A nickname that you know and you know the person that gave it to me. I'm Angel. Mark's my best friend and I had to tell you because you had to know." She bit her lip and timidly looked up into Addison's face. The condemnation and anger she had expected were absent. Instead she found Addison's lips creased in a small smile. "And he's moving to Seattle."

Now Addison's jaw dropped open. "You're kidding. Mark 'I'll live and die in New York' Sloan is moving to Seattle? Why?" She paused and stared at Meredith for a moment. "He's coming for you isn't he?"

Meredith gave a miserable nod. "He says there's nothing left for him in New York. Derek's family won't talk to him and his own is gone anyway. He was here for a few days this week. He likes my friends. And so he's moving here."

Addison took Meredith's hand in her own before she sat back with a Cheshire grin. "So you're Mark's Angel? That's fabulous!" She laughed heartily. "Derek is going to freak out. This is great. And so very odd. Perfect but odd."

Meredith shook her head at the other woman. "So…You're not angry then? That he's coming here?"

Addison laughed again and shook her head while squeezing Meredith's hand. "Hell no. I think you'll be really good for Mark. He's been talking about you for years. I can't believe I never made the connection. You said he was here in Seattle this week? Did he come to the hospital at all? Why didn't I see him?"

"He was only here for a few days and yeah he was at the hospital for some of it. He just stuck with me and you were avoiding me and I was avoiding Derek."

"True." They sat in silence for a moment. "About the friends thing?" Addison started tentatively. "I think I'd like that. Mark always said you were great."

Meredith giggled. "He said the same thing about you. I'd like to be your friend, Addison, but I can't be friends with Derek. Not yet. He lied to me. And he's a jerk. And…I'm not going to complain about him to you anymore because he's your husband and you love him. I just…I can't be friends with him."

"I wouldn't expect you to be," Addison assured her. "I'm allowed to have friends that don't like my husband. It's fun to bitch about him to them. If they like my husband then they always try to make me see his side. If they don't like him then they get drunk with me and agree with everything I say."

"I'm meeting the others over at Joe's. Wanna come?" Meredith offered.

Addison stood up and stretched. "Yeah. Why not? Let me find Derek and then I'll join you."

"Sounds good."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Addison's eyes searched the bar for her new friend slowly. She finally spotted her sitting at a table by the dart board surrounded by Bailey's other interns. She made her way over and plopped down in a chair next to Meredith. "He still hasn't signed them," she greeted. "But he says he still hasn't decided."

"McAss?" Yang questioned with a sneer. "Well he's an ass and he'll try to keep you both hanging as long as he can." She poured a shot of tequila into a shot glass and passed it to Addison. "Drink up."

"Thanks," Addison muttered warily. She'd been getting unfriendly glares and cool professionalism from these interns since she'd arrived and now they were smiling at her and acting friendly. "McAss?"

"Yep." Meredith nodded a little drunkenly. "Or McBastard. Or McJerk. He used to be McDreamy but we've downgraded him cuz he's an ass. You know he called me Meri? I hate being called Meri. Mer's okay, Angel is great. I love it when Mark calls me Angel but Meri? Blegh."

"I like McAss," Addison commented and threw back her head to pour the shot down. "Give me another."

"That's my girl," Meredith cheered. "Slam it down. You only live once and life's too short to be miserable if you don't have to be. Marky told me that a few months ago. He was trying to get me to go out with Derek but he didn't know it was Derek."

"How did you get so drunk so fast?" Addison questioned with a laugh.

"I forgot to eat today. Too busy. And sad. Had to drop Marky off at the airport this morning. It was sad. But he kissed me and damn can that man kiss or what?"

Addison downed another shot and nodded. "Oh he can. He really can." She grinned at Meredith.

"At least someone's getting kissed," Izzie grumbled. "Stupid boy penises. Hate them. Hate them. Hate them."

"I sense a story there," Addison giggled. "Crap! I forgot to eat dinner. I'm already feeling it."

Cristina laughed. "Lean closer and I'll tell you all about it." She took a swig of her beer and proceeded to catch Addison up on all the drama. It didn't take long for them to accept the attending into their group. She was funny and she was nice and it didn't matter that she was married to Derek Shepherd because he didn't matter to them at all anymore.


	17. Into You Like a Train

**Disclaimer: Nope. Stop asking. I don't have the funds to afford to buy the DVDs let alone the show itself.**

**Into You Like a Train**

"Mark!" A chorus of voices shouted over the phone.

"Interns!" Mark shouted back.

"And me," Addison objected. "I'm not an intern. Haven't been one in…ages, I think. Don't ask how long. It's not polite to ask a lady her age."

"Addie?" He asked surprised. He'd known that Angel was going to tell her but he hadn't thought it would be so soon. "What are you doing there? Did they kidnap an attending again? I keep telling them that it won't get them more surgeries but they don't listen."

"I kidnapped myself thank you very much. I like these interns. And you're Angel is my friend now too. So there." She stuck her tongue out at the phone.

Mark could hear Meredith's drunken happy giggle over the line. "Are any of you sober? At all? Cuz it sure doesn't sound like it."

"George, Izzie and Cris are fine," Meredith laughed. "But me and Addie have had half a bottle of tequila. She's fun to drink with and she said she'll bitch about Derek with me. And you probably. When you piss me off. Which you will. Cuz you're Mark. So be prepared. And afraid."

"I am." He guaranteed her. "Very afraid actually. Izzie, George, Cris? Make sure they get home safe, right? Don't let Addie go back to the hotel alone."

"I should hang up on you for that," Cristina growled. "Like I'd do that to someone. She might die or something. If you weren't McSteamy I would hang up on you. But Mer would just call you back so what's the point?"

"Don't hang up on my McSteamy," Meredith scolded as beeping sounds filled the air and sudden chaos hit the bar. "Even though I'm going to now because there's a train wreck and they need all hands on deck. Love you, Marky. Call you later."

"Love you too, Angel." He sighed wishing he was there. Heart surgery in elevators and train wrecks. God nothing ever happened in New York anymore. Well…he was sure things did but it had been forever since he'd been called in for an emergency. He couldn't wait to move.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

As a group they stumbled across the street and into the hospital. Addison split off from them to head to her office while they went to the locker room to change. Meredith rested her back against the wall of the elevator that was headed to the pit and hoped Bailey didn't kill her for being drunk. She'd been off duty. It wasn't like she'd committed a crime.

Bailey had just finished lecturing them on not making mistakes out of tiredness when Addison stumbled from the elevator and sagged next to Meredith on the wall. "Oh not you too," Bailey groaned.

"Yep. Though Mer's farther gone than me," Addison claimed.

"Traitor," Meredith mumbled. "Just feed me to the resident why don't you?"

"It's Bailey," Addison giggled. "She's scary even to the attendings. Even the chief listens when she barks. She looks very pretty tonight though. Think we should tell her how nice she looks?"

Meredith considered the short resident for a moment and nodded. "She does look very nice. We should tell her but then she'd think we're sucking up even though we're not. But you don't need to suck up to her. You're her boss…sorta. So you tell her and I'll nod like it was your idea."

"Okay, I'll tell her." Addison nodded quickly and swayed as her head spun.

"Oh Good God," Bailey groaned and scowled at the two of them. "Just stay out of the way until I have time to deal with you."

They nodded at her and followed her into the pit.

"Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd," one of the nurses called. "We've got a pregnant burn victim here. Third trimester."

"Don't even think about it Addison Montgomery-Shepherd," Bailey ordered. "Call neonatal to get someone down here until Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd is sober."

Addison slumped to the wall beside Meredith and looked longingly around the ER. "So not fair."

"Yeah," Meredith mumbled. "And there's your husband," she nodded to the door he'd just flown through. "He's such an attention whore."

Addison collapsed against her side in a fit of giggles. "He is. But Marky's just as bad."

"Yeah. But Marky's McSteamy and he's like a plastics god or something. He…right he's such an attention whore too."

They giggled quietly as Derek walked right by them without seeming to see them, his gaze intent on the nurse calling him over for a consult. This only made them giggle more.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey Marky," Meredith's cheerful voice greeted him. "Me and Addie are trying to find banana bags so we won't be drunk anymore. It's a mess in here. You will not believe what we just saw! Two people with a pole stuck through them. It was incredible!"

"Why didn't you just go home? You and Addie can't work right now, right?"

"Bailey won't let us," Addison pouted. "She said if she has to stay then everyone does. She's mean. And there was a third trimester burn victim and she wouldn't even let me go check on her. She's so mean."

"She's Bailey." He laughed at their pouting.

"Got them," Meredith cheered. "You better stick yourself, Addie cuz I don't want to mangle your arms. I'll stick myself too. Easier that way. Sorry, Marky. We called you for a reason but I can't remember what it is now. We gotta go now though. Cuz seriously, there's a pole through two people and I so want to find out what happens. And Addie needs to check on her burn victim."

"Bye Mark," Addison snickered. "See you in six days."

"Bye ladies," Mark laughed.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith could feel the alcohol leaving her system as she stared at the scans before her. She seriously couldn't believe that Bonnie and Tom were joking and talking with this much damage inside them.

Derek breezed through the door and stopped abruptly. "What happened?" He asked her with concern.

She gave him a confused look and he indicated the IV attached to her. "Oh. Tequila." She shrugged.

That piece of information only seemed to deepen his concern. "I'm keeping an eye on her," Bailey said with an evil glare at Meredith. Meredith shrugged.

"I was off duty," Meredith insisted.

Derek gave her a sad look. "I'm sorry," he murmured and went to look at the films.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I don't like being sober," Meredith pouted as soon as he answered. "It sucks. It's painful and sad and not fair."

"What is it, Angel?" He asked sympathetically. "And where's your partner in crime?"

"Addie went to work cuz she didn't have time to drink as much as I did. And it sucks because we both got sober for the same reason." She sighed and put her head down on the table in front of her as she waited for George. "How do you choose Mark?"

"Choose what?" He asked confused at her rambling.

"Who lives and who dies?" She elaborated. "There's a pole stuck through two people and the only way to operate is to move one of them from the pole. But that's a death sentence for the one that gets moved. It sucks."

"It does." He agreed with a frown.

"So how do you choose?" She asked again.

"I don't." He told her bluntly. "That's why I'm in plastics. I hated having to make choices like that. I don't know how they'll choose and you don't have to choose tonight. It's not your call. One day you might have to make a call like this, but not today."

"Okay." She accepted his answer for now.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"She died, Mark." Her voice was soft and sad. "Bonnie. The girl with the pole through her. She died so that the man, Tom, could live. It's so sad. And everyone just abandoned her and let her die."

"I know, Angel." He told her in quietly. He knew his own voice held the sadness to match hers. "George told me while you were in the shower. He said that no one felt that surgery high today. Even though Tom lived."

"Yeah." She sniffed. "I don't know how to do this. I don't know if I can."

"You can." He encouraged. "It never gets any easier. It never gets any better. But you keep working at it and the ones you save? Those are the ones that get you through it. So go save a life. Go tell someone that their loved one will be fine. Think you can do that?"

Meredith swallowed and sat down on the bench beside Izzie and George. "Yeah. Yeah. We can do that. Can't we guys?" She turned to the others.

Mark heard the faint murmurs of assent. "Good."

"Better get cleaned up. Rounds in five minutes," Bailey's voice interrupted the silence. "Tell Mark you'll talk to him later, people."


	18. Something to Talk About

**Disclaimer: Not mine. Never have been never will be. Be a whole different show if they were. **

**Something to Talk About**

"God," Addison groaned as she plopped down on the chair next to Meredith beside the coffee cart. "It's too early or too late. Stupid babies and their nonlinear times. Why can't they be born between nine and five? Is that too much to ask?"

Meredith gave out a tired chuckle. "Yep. Kids are born just to screw with the adults around them."

"No kidding. Stupid babies."

"I blame it all on the stupid boy penises. They're the root of all evil."

"They are. They really are."

"So marriage counseling today?" Meredith waited for Addison's nod. "Fun. Think it'll help?"

"I have no idea. Maybe. I hope so. He's just so…so…God! He's McAss. I really like that one, by the way."

"No problem. I'd better go in. Don't want to be late again." Meredith swiped her coffee cup up and stood. "It's good, Addie, that you're trying. But the thing is…he has to try too. Or it's just not worth it."

"Yeah. I know." Suddenly Addison brightened. "Two more days, Mer. Two more days. See yours is trying."

Meredith grinned. "Yeah. I can't wait. It's going to be so much fun."

Addison nodded and watched her walk into the hospital before sighing and following to find her husband and head off to the therapist.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"My friends suck." Meredith pouted.

"Am I included in that definitive statement?" Mark chuckled.

"Are you here?" She asked brusquely. "Are you stopping Izzie and Cristina from coming up with half-baked patient stealing plans?" She paused for a moment and he opened his mouth to say something but she continued before he had the chance. "No. You are not. So yes, you suck too."

"What'd they do?" Who knew with those two? Maybe they'd finally gone completely off their rockers and actually kidnapped an attending this time. Hopefully Derek. His imagination ran with that thought and he saw Derek locked in the basement of the hospital while the interns used him for surgery practice.

"Stole a hysterical pregnancy patient from psych because the intern that admitted him didn't even do a proper exam." She stated to his mixed relief and disappointment. Derek looked so scared tied up. It had been a good image. "And they're right about him not being crazy. It's not fluid in his…er, womb. There's something in there. And they forgot to get his chart. So now I have to flirt with the psych guy so they can steal his chart."

"No dating psych doctors. You promised," he reminded her just to hear her giggle. "You know, I don't remember internship being this eventful. Where did I go wrong?"

"Should have come to Seattle Grace if you wanted excitement, Mark." She taunted. "But you didn't. You went to some boring, run of the mill hospital in New York where they don't have hysterical pregnancies or train wrecks or brain-dead brain surgeons with marital amnesia."

"I'm coming there now." He pouted. "Does that count for nothing?"

Meredith smiled a small fond smile. "Mark, it means everything. Everything."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Cristina, Meredith and Izzie walked slowly off of the elevator as they flipped through Mr. Herman's chart, talking softly to each other. They held the chart between them and paid no attention to their surroundings.

"Hi," Derek's voice interrupted them. "Hello. Hi." He continued as Izzie grabbed the chart from Meredith's hands and closed it before he could read anything incriminating. "Meredith," he started. "Maybe we could, you know, uh, talk."

Meredith arched a brow at him. "I'm not on your service today, Dr. Shepherd. What would we have to talk about?"

Derek sighed and gave Izzie and Cristina pointed looks that they ignored. "Like the fact that you got drunk because I wouldn't sign the divorce papers," he suggested so that only the three interns could hear him.

"I didn't get drunk because of you," Meredith protested. She stopped herself from explaining that she'd forgotten to eat and had been having a grand time with his wife. If he really wanted to know so badly he could ask Addison. "Excuse me," she glared and brushed past him.

Derek moved to follow her but Cristina grabbed his arm and halted him. "Leave her be," she ordered. "Haven't you done enough damage? The entire hospital thinks she's heartbroken over you."

Derek scowled at her. "And that stunt the other night wasn't her being heartbroken?" He sneered.

Izzie laughed. "No. That was Mer being busy and forgetting to eat and paying the price." The smile left her face and she gave him a hard look. It felt a bit like having a Care Bear glare at him. "Stop spreading rumors that she's still in love with you. She isn't."

The two interns shot him another glare and walked past him to follow their friend. Meredith had good friends, even if they were liars. Meredith was hurting because of him. He felt a bit guilty but Addison was his wife and he owed it to both of them to give their marriage another shot. Meredith would just have to understand that.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"We got caught." She informed him. "But the patient is now on the surgical service instead of psych because he took a pregnancy test that came up positive."

"Strange." He commented as he ran through all the possible causes of a male getting a positive pregnancy test. "Cool though."

"Yep." She confirmed. "Bailey was irritated with us but I think she's a bit proud of us too. She said we'd done a good job even though she doesn't condone patient theft."

"She should be proud of you guys. You did good, Angel."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Mark." George's voice whined at him. Mark could hear the sounds of the cafeteria in the background and knew he was on speakerphone. "They had a pregnant guy and didn't tell me. Neither did you for that matter. What kind of friend are you?" George huffed.

"The kind that can keep secrets." Mark snickered. "Besides you didn't ever ask me what the others were up to." He pointed out.

"He has a point, George," Izzie said. "But we can get you floor space in the O.R. for fifty bucks."

Meredith glared at her. "You're selling tickets and we don't even know what's wrong with him."

"Whatever he's got inside has got to come out, Mer." Cristina cut in. "We're just brokering a few deals."

"Sort of like backstage passes." Izzie continued. "You want in on the money?"

"No." Meredith said in unison with Mark.

"I didn't need a pregnant guy," George scoffed. "I was Burke's new go-to guy, but that's over thanks to Cristina. He didn't know that I knew about you two."

"Stop talking," Cristina ordered and pushed at his shoulder to make him back up out of her space.

"You are rather loud, George," Mark pointed out reasonably. "And you're in the cafeteria, where anyone could hear you. Get a grip."

"Shut up, Mark," George groaned.

"I don't have to take this abuse, you know. I could always hang up and let you guys deal with pissed off Meredith. How would you all like that?"

"What on Earth?" Izzie asked in a surprised tone.

"What? What is it? What's going on?" Mark whined.

"Alex pushing a girl around in a wheelchair," Meredith explained.

"Oh." Mark said in a tone of comprehension. "Right. I forgot. He's playing big brother today."

"Really?" Three voices asked simultaneously. Meredith just smiled. She knew Alex was a good guy somewhere deep inside.

There was a short uncomfortable silence. "Hi," the girl finally said. "I'm Alex's charity case."

"Yeah. I like her already," Cristina commented with an arch look at Alex.

George leaned closer to Alex. "Are you volunteering?"

"Be nice, Georgie. Hello again, Nicole." Mark interrupted what he knew could turn into an argument.

"Hey Mark," the girl answered with a shy smile. "How's New York?"

"Still hopping." Mark returned in gently teasing tones. "Can't wait to get back. And since they're being jerks allow me to introduce you to the Interns of Doom." He ignored the protests from the interns and continued. "Meredith, she's the one with the green eyes. Cristina, she's the pissy one. Izzie, the blonde, hot one who is also kind of pissy but only with Alex. And George, he's the cute, cuddly one. You can take any of the others but Mer's mine so hands off, kiddo."

Nicole giggled and Cristina's pager beeped. "Oh!" Cristina moaned. "I'm hungry, dammit!" She angrily picked up her tray and stormed from the table to answer the page.

"So this is cool!" Nicole enthused innocently. "A real live lunchtime in a real cafeteria with trays and—and friends."

"We're not his friends," Izzie objected with a scowl at Alex.

"I am, sorta." Mark opposed. "As much as I can be friends with an intern that isn't Mer, anyway."

"So are you the cool kids around here or something?" Nicole asked interested.

"What would make you think that?" Meredith asked as she flipped a page in her magazine.

"Seems like everyone's talking about you," Nicole pointed out.

Meredith took a quick look around and then glared at Izzie, George and Alex. "What did you do this time?" She hissed.

"It wasn't us," they all protested. Meredith was unaware of the rumors McAss had started with his stupid conversation about her the other day. He and Dr. Nelson had been standing in front of the nurse's station the day after the train wreck when Bailey and the interns had dragged by. McAss had commented that Meredith had been more tired than the others because she'd been trying to drink his memory away the night before. The nurses that had overheard the comment had run with the story and now, at least to those that didn't know her well, she was some tragic heroine that was two steps from suicide. None of her friends was eager to inform her of the current gossip about her. Besides, as soon as Mark started working the rumor mill would have a whole bunch of new fodder.

Meredith, with a glare at her remaining friends, stood up and scooped her phone off of the table. "It was nice to meet you, Nicole. Mark and I have to be going now because these clowns did something to attract even more notice and I'd like to just finish out the next two days without everyone using me for gossip fodder. Have a nice day."

"Bye kiddo." Mark called to Nicole.

"Um, bye," she looked over at Izzie and George as Meredith walked away. "Did I say something?"

"No, no," the assured her.

"She's missing her boyfriend and she's a bit…sensitive right now." Alex told her. "She's normally really cool but…yeah, Mark being gone is getting to her. Not to mention that McAss seems to be stalking her again."

"Oh. I still don't understand." Nicole frowned.

"Come closer, grasshopper," George grinned. "We'll catch you up on all the Seattle Grace Hospital gossip if you like."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith ignored the stares in the gallery as she watched Burke and George operate on Mrs. Griswold. She was going to kill Cris and Izzie for whatever it was they done now. Why was everyone staring at her though? Why were they all whispering and then suddenly stopping when she walked by? It didn't make sense unless…whatever Cris and Izzie had done everyone expected her to know the details and they were too scared to ask.

Derek watched her under the cover of the crowd of people in the gallery. She looked okay. A bit sad maybe, but that was to be expected. He had broken up with her after all. She was perfectly composed though, watching the operation with a studious look that seemed slightly strained. If he could just talk to her then maybe he could make things better but her friends had rallied around her and had blocked him every time he even looked at her.

Izzie caught Derek's look at Meredith and rolled her eyes. The man was completely delusional when it came to her friend. Meredith could care less what he did. She scowled at him when his eyes caught hers and she smirked in triumph when he finally looked away and back to the heart surgery.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Her heart caught on fire?" Mark yelped. "Really? And she lived? Damn…that's just…wow."

"I know, right? Scary as Hell, but wow too. And George rocked. He was so calm and he didn't panic and he anticipated what was needed. It was incredible." She babbled, impressed with her quasi-brother.

"George is a complete rockstar," Mark agreed. "First open heart surgery in the elevator and then dousing a fire in the heart of a patient. A rockstar."

"Yeah," Meredith giggled and then sighed as a dark haired form walked past her. She ignored Derek and turned away from him to continue to Mr. Herman's room. "Mark, he's still watching me. It's driving me insane and Addie's getting pissed off at him. He says he's trying with her but he's paying more attention to me. Attention that I don't want. It's driving me nuts."

"I know, Angel." He sympathized. "Nine more days. And then I'll be there to keep him away from you." He grinned at the thought of working with her. He seriously couldn't wait.

"Two," she insisted stubbornly. "Well, three since I have the day you come back and the day after off. You didn't really think I'd let you be all alone while I'm stuck at work did you?"

"Not really." He laughed happily.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

He saw her alone finally. He'd been getting more than a bit annoyed with the other interns for keeping him away from her so successfully. He paused for a moment just to take in the picture of her standing at the nurse's desk using one hand to write while the other held her phone to her ear while she laughed.

He had to talk to her. He didn't care that she was most likely talking to that sort of brother of hers. He really needed to make sure she was all right. Derek set off down the hallway towards her.

Bailey took a step backwards, directly in his path. "Turn around," she told him without looking up from her file. "Walk away."

"From who?" He tried innocently. Jesus! Why was everyone so against him talking to Meredith?

Bailey looked up from her chart and gave him a glare. "From my intern."

Derek turned on the charm. "Well, I wasn't."

Bailey gave him a look of utter disbelief. "Yeah. Yeah," she contradicted. "Yes, you were." She sighed in frustration. Stupid, dumb, damn fool, she thought. "Come on, look—look, you can't do this. You're ruining her reputation and your own. You have a wife. Leave Grey alone. She doesn't need you stalking her and trying to talk to her and just bugging the Hell out of her."

Derek frowned. "I just want to find out if she's okay," he tried to explain.

"She's—" Meredith's laugh rang down the corridor and they both turned to look. Nurse Tyler was leaning over the top of the wall around the nurse's desk with his head close to hers. He was speaking into Meredith's phone as they both laughed at something. "Looks like she's just fine." Bailey finished with a snort.

Derek looked at Meredith and then down at Bailey and sighed. Looked like he wouldn't get to talk to Meredith this time either. He walked off with a sigh.

Bailey rolled her eyes at his retreating form and headed to the nurse's desk to pick up the charts from Meredith and find out what joke Mark was telling this time.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"That's her?" The whisper reached Meredith's ears on her way to Mr. Herman's room. She turned towards it but the speaker was already looking somewhere else.

"Well, what did she expect really? He's _married._ And an attending. She should have known it would only lead to heartbreak." The whisper was a bit louder this time.

Meredith stopped walking and turned to look at the group of nurses and interns. The way they all shut up and turned away told her that they were talking about her. She frowned a bit and headed to the nurse's desk. "Olivia?" She asked quietly when she got there. "May I speak with you for a moment?"

The small red head looked up startled. "Of course, Dr. Grey," she said and stood up.

Meredith led her a bit away from everyone else and sighed. "I know we're not friends or anything but…could you tell me why everyone's looking at me and talking about me, please? If you know that is. I mean I'm not accusing you of gossip or anything. It's just…do you know why?"

Olivia adopted that deer in the headlights look. "You mean you don't know?" She squeaked. Meredith shook her head. "You and McDreamy," Olivia confided in a whisper. "The buzz is that he left you for his wife and now you're all sad and heartbroken and suicidal because you loved him and thought you would be the forever thing." The red head said in a rush. "I've tried to tell them that they're all crazy and that you are fine but apparently he started that rumor. Unintentionally."

Meredith's jaw dropped open and she spluttered for a moment before pulling herself together. "Really?" She growled.

Olivia took a step back and swallowed at the light of fury in Dr. Grey's normally kind green eyes. "Dr. Grey?" She asked hesitantly. "Meredith? Um…you know the rumors about you and Dr. Shepherd will die down when Dr. Sloan starts, right? I mean it's so obvious that you and him are _together_ together. He's so in love with you it's nearly sickening to see. He's an absolute sap about you. I personally think it's wonderful and sweet." She put a hand on Meredith's arm. "Screw them if they believe the gossip around here," she said staunchly. "They'll learn better soon enough."

Meredith banked the fires of her fury and patted the hand on her arm. "Yes. Yes they will. Thank you, Olivia." She headed on her way to Mr. Herman's room without another word.

Olivia watched her walk away and felt very sorry for the next person that said anything to Dr. Grey. Or pissed the woman off in any way. They'd be a grease spot on the floor.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Your friends suck, you know that right?" She bit out before he could say hello. He guessed that hellos really were no longer a necessary part of telephone conversations. He couldn't remember the last time either of them used that word anyway. "You have terrible taste in friends. Derek and Cristina and Izzie. Seriously Mark what is wrong with your friends?" She exploded.

"Er…what'd they do?" He inquired hesitantly.

"Selling tickets to see Mr. Herman. Staring at him. Taking pictures. Touching his belly. I kicked them all out of his room and now I'm standing guard until his surgery." She shouted. He heard a deep breath as she tried to calm herself. "And Derek with his fake concerned looks and rumor starting. I'm fine. Why is he looking at me like he thinks I'm about to kill myself or something? He has everybody in this stupid place thinking I'm about to run up to the roof and jump off or something."

He rubbed at his eyes. "I agree with you about the Mr. Herman thing and you know that. Derek on the other hand…well, I know you're fine and what rumors? The others haven't told me about any rumors."

She blew out a frustrated breath. "I'm not surprised and I have no desire to repeat them. If you really want to know ask one of the demons that call themselves our friends. Stupid, gossip-mongering jerks. Why didn't they tell me? And Cris and Izzie were selling tickets! It's insane! Mr. Herman is a person. With feelings and he didn't need them treating him like an object and a thing that wasn't human! Stupid dickheads!"

"Breathe, Angel. Breathing is good. Needed even. Just breathe." He advised her calmly.

"I know!" She shouted and then stopped and took a deep breath and then let it out. "Sorry. I just wanted to rant for a bit."

He chuckled at her. "I'm always available to listen to the ranting. 36 hours or so more to go and then I'll be back."

"Thank God." She expelled an explosive breath. "Maybe we can have a bit of sanity around here then."

"Sure. I'll let you believe that." He laughed again and she rolled her eyes.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Tell Alex I said nicely done, Angel." Mark told her as she pulled into her driveway.

"Tell him yourself. You have his number or you can tell him in a few days. In person. It's much more fun that way." She grinned.

"I could do that. Think I will. Want to see Izzie's expression when I tease her about that kiss anyway." He laughed.

"You are such a manwhore. And a pervert." She accused lightly.

"And you love me that way."

"Yeah. And I love you just the way you are." She grinned out at the dark house in front of her and turned the engine off.


	19. Homecoming

**Disclaimer: Still not mine. Seriously, did you expect it to change?**

**A/N: WARNING: Just thought I'd let you all know that there is sex in this chapter. It's at the end. If you want to skip it go ahead. That is why I put this warning up.**

**Homecoming**

Meredith tapped her foot impatiently. His plane was late. Why did his plane have to be delayed? Didn't fate know how important his coming was? The waiting was killing her.

She checked the board again and sighed. Twenty more minutes. She shook her head. She'd go get him a coffee and then come back. Besides she was tired she could use the caffeine too.

"Mer?" A voice asked quietly from behind her as she stood in line at the coffee kiosk set up not too far from the gate.

Meredith turned around. "Addison? What are you doing here?" She smiled at the older woman who had become her friend so easily.

Addison shifted uncomfortably. "I uh…I wanted to talk to Mark before he came by the hospital. I have to apologize to him and…er, yeah. I just…damn. I wanted to see him before things go pear shaped with Derek."

Meredith patted her arm. "I can understand that. You know he's going to freak out and you have to stand by him but Mark is still your friend."

Addison smiled in relief that Meredith understood. "Good I didn't want to make you think that I was…but I really did want to see him before things blow up."

Meredith ordered the coffees for herself and Mark. "Want anything?" Addison shook her head. Together the two women moved over to the side to wait for the coffee. "Addison…I don't do jealousy. Not with Mark for sure. I know quite well what he is and what he pretends to be. He's a bit of a manwhore and I'm not expecting that to change. I'm not going to freak out every time he talks to you or any other woman. I probably wouldn't even freak out if he slept with you."

Addison stared at her in surprise. "What? Why not? I thought…aren't you trying to start a relationship with him?"

"No. I've had a relationship with him for years. I know what he is. It's never bothered me. He goes out and sleeps with someone and then he tells me all about it when he comes home. I know it's strange but really…I'm the one he'll come home too. I'm the one who gets to see the sleepy morning him. I'll get the rides to work and the lunch in the cafeteria and the movie dates and the walks in the moonlight. The others, and I don't want to hurt you but even you, they get the sex and then he leaves and comes back to me. The sex with them means nothing more than…scratching an itch and seeing if he can." Meredith paused and shrugged. "Our relationship is different and complicated and hard to understand but it works for us and always has. I think I'd only get mad if he didn't tell me about it."

Addison shook her head in bemusement. "You aren't wanting forever with him?"

Meredith grinned impishly. "I already have forever with him." She gathered the coffees and headed back to the gate. "Tell me something, Addie. In all the time you've known him how often did he stick with a woman?" She paused and smiled as Addison's eyes widened in realization. "Just me and you, right?" Addison nodded. "The others were flings. Meaningless flings. Us? Us he loved. But you loved Derek and as much as I like you, you know that Mark would have slept with other women even when he was with you."

"He did," Addison confirmed. "But he was faithful for a few months."

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. I know. And he really was. He wasn't hiding one of his women from you. But then…well, I know you don't want to talk about what happened but it did and he was hurt and he knew you still loved Derek so he fell back on old habits."

Addison leaned against a pillar next to Meredith. "He told you?"

"Addison?" Meredith chuckled. "He tells me everything."

Addison cracked a small smile. "I remember. It's funny. I never was jealous of you. I could see the way Mark's face lit up when you called and how much he laughed when he was talking to you and it never bothered me. Of all the women on the planet I should have been jealous of you and I never was."

Meredith giggled and took a sip of her coffee. "Good. I never was of you either. I hoped Mark got his happy ending. I hated you for a bit but it wasn't because of you being with Mark."

"I know," Addison sighed again. "I regret it now. But then again I don't. Me and Mark together would have been awful parents. He'd be a great dad but the two of us would have royally traumatized any child with our stupidity. I still wonder what it would have been like though."

Meredith nodded and leaned against her in a show of support. "I'd give you a hug but my hands are full," she said softly.

Addison giggled a bit and rested her head on top of Meredith's and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Oh no," a male voice groaned. "You two really are friends. I'm screwed."

Meredith looked up at him and grinned. "Mark!" Addison picked her head up and took the coffees from Meredith's hands. Meredith smiled her thanks and threw herself into Mark's chest. "Hey."

Mark grinned, dropped his bags and wrapped his arms around her. He kissed her nose and then captured her lips with his own for a quick passionate kiss. "Hey," he whispered back. "Missed you."

"Missed you too." Meredith said quietly. "I'm so glad you're back."

Addison shifted and Mark looked up with a smile. "Hey Addie. How are you?" He asked a bit uncomfortably.

Addison grinned at him and held out his coffee. "I'm good thanks. Here. Mer bought you coffee. I just wanted to see you before…well, before Derek does actually. How was the flight?"

Mark took the coffee from her hand as Meredith stepped back and retrieved her own. "It was…bumpy but fast. I just wanted to get here. And I got to see my two favorite women within minutes of landing so I'm great." He took a swallow of his coffee and then gave Addison his sexy smirk. "So…why are you here, Addie?"

Addison shook her head at him. "Don't waste that smirk on me, Sloan. I just wanted to talk to you. I wanted you to know that I'm glad you're here for Mer's sake if nothing else and I still want to be friends."

Mark looked down into Meredith's encouraging green eyes and then back to Addison. "I'd like that. You know it'll piss off Derek though, right?" He leaned down to pick up his bags but each of the girls grabbed one before he could. All he was left with was his laptop case. He shrugged and took Meredith's hand in his own after she'd slung his garment bag over her shoulder.

Addison shrugged. "I don't care. Derek doesn't tell me who to be friends with."

Mark gave her an admiring smile. "Good. So, to baggage claim then. I only have one suitcase, Mer. I had the rest shipped to your house."

"Okay," Meredith agreed easily. "Someone should be there for the next week or so to sign for it. We all should be working different schedules for the next two weeks."

The three of them walked in companionable silence to baggage claim to reclaim Mark's suitcase and then they parted company. Addison watched them walk away with Meredith's head resting on Mark's upper arm. She had never seen Mark watch anyone the way he watched Meredith. Addison quietly wiped away a tear. She wanted Derek to look at her like that again and she was terrified he never would. It had been so long since he'd even seen her. She just wanted what Mark and Meredith had.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark parked Meredith's jeep in the driveway and made sure to leave room for Izzie and George to park. He turned his head and happy green eyes caught his. "Hey," he said quietly. "We're home."

Meredith grinned at him. "Yep. Finally." She sat up straight and opened her door. "Let's go. The house is empty right now but God knows how long it'll stay that way."

Mark chuckled and opened his own door. "George and Izzie swore to me that they were going to be on-call all night. It'll stay empty for us, Angel."

"There's always Cris and Alex," Meredith called to him as she opened the back of the jeep and pulled his laptop case and garment bag out. "They show up whenever the urge strikes them."

"They also know I'm home which means they'll give us privacy until tomorrow morning at least," Mark pointed out and pulled the other two bags from the back before closing it.

Meredith giggled and grinned at him. "Yeah."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

He couldn't wait any longer. He'd held himself back while they'd added his clothes to her closet and dresser and put his toiletries away but now he couldn't stop himself any longer. "Mer, Angel," he breathed and caught her to his chest. "Mer," he breathed out again. He bent down and took her lips. He felt like it had been years since the last time he'd been able to do this.

Meredith melted instantly. "Mark," she groaned into his mouth. "I want you."

It had been so damn long. Too long. Far too long since he'd held his Angel in his arms, smelled her sweet scent, tasted her honeyed lips. The bed was way too far away. All the way across the room. He hefted her against him and settled her against the wall. Crowding her. Overwhelming her. His lips and hands were everywhere. Hers scrabbled everywhere they could reach. The sounds of tearing fabric and popping buttons rent the still air. "Angel," he groaned when he finally felt her silky skin along his own.

"Mark," her husky voice answered him. Her fingers scrambled and squeezed his broad shoulders. Her nails scoring against his flesh.

Overcome with need, with want, he bared her lower half and dropped to his knees before her. Before she could process or whine or protest he buried his head between her legs. The scent of her, the taste filled him and he nearly wept in joy.

Meredith buried her fingers in his hair and held on for the ride. His tongue lapped, flicked and drove her nearly insane with need. Teeth nipped in delicious pain. He sucked and bit and licked every bit of her essence. She lost count of how many times he brought her to the edge before easing her away from it only to start over. "Mark," she groaned breathlessly. "Please. Please, Mark."

Mark pulled away from the warmth of her and sent her his sexy smirk with wet lips. His blue eyes burned with desire. "What, Angel? What do you want?"

Meredith gathered her scrambled wits and looked down at him with her own sexy smirk. "You. Now. Inside me. Please?"

He reached for his jeans and pulled out a condom package. One hand held her against the wall as the other covered his cock with the protection. "Your wish," he husked out and stood smoothly. He lifted her by the waist and she wrapped her legs around him. "My command," and slid into her.

She grunted wordlessly as he slid home and held on tight when he started to move. Stars burst behind her eyes and she threw her head back, baring her throat. "Mark. Oh, God. So good." She rambled.

He loved the noises she made. The breathless groans and squeals. But what he really needed right in that moment was her scream. He bent his head and took one nipple gently in his mouth. One hand crept from her hips and reached between them slowly. On his next thrust he bit down and pressed hard against her clit even as his cock drilled heavily into her.

Meredith loosed a scream as her orgasm crashed over her unexpectedly. Her walls fluttered around him and squeezed. Mark groaned and let go. "Meredith!" He called out.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Jesus," Meredith groaned an hour later as they finally collapsed on her bed. "That was…damn."

Mark chuckled tiredly and pulled her onto his chest. "Yeah." He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed. "It was."

Meredith snuggled into his chest and let her eyes drift closed. "Love you," she mumbled and drifted off into a sated sleep.

"Love you too, Angel. I'm home," Mark answered before letting sleep pull him under with her.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Waking up with Meredith had always been one of his favorite activities and the years apart hadn't changed that. This seemed almost too easy. It was like Europe all over again. Constantly in each other's pockets with barely a breath of space between them. How did nearly five years of only seeing each other when he had a weekend free to shuttle to New Hampshire or she had a long weekend and showed up at his apartment fade away so quickly to be what they'd had before? It was eerie how easily they'd fallen back into each other.

Meredith stirred against his chest and nuzzled into him. "Morning," she mumbled huskily.

"Hey," he answered quietly. "It's not morning yet. It's like three a.m."

He felt her shrug against him. "So?"

He laughed quietly. "Yeah." He lay in the darkness listening to her breathing for a moment longer. "Do we need to discuss this, Angel?"

She lifted her head and gave him a confused look. "The fact that it's not morning?"

He grinned. She was extra adorable when she was sleepy. "No, us. This…whatever we have?"

She put her head back down on his chest. "Nope. We're good. Remember the everything conversation? Back with the Hmong patient, Anna. A lifetime of tomorrows. I meant it. We're an us. A MarknMeredith. You meant it, didn't you?"

He smiled into the darkness. "Yeah. Yeah, I did and I do. Sorry, I…uh…forgot about that conversation. Well, didn't forget but…"

She nodded. "It's dark," she whispered. "And we've been alone. And the dark likes to talk when we're alone. It likes to make us doubt everything. But we're not alone now so the dark can go fuck itself. I won't doubt you. I can't. You're Mark."

"And you're Angel and we're okay," he nodded and let his eyes slip closed again. They'd be all right. They were together and that was all that really mattered at the end of the day.


	20. Let it Be

**Disclaimer: Still not owned by me. And I am still poor. But that doesn't stop me pretending does it?**

**Let It Be**

Meredith sat gingerly across from Mark at her kitchen table and glared at him. "This is all your fault."

Mark grinned and passed her a mug of coffee. "I know." He winked. "Didn't hear you complaining at the time though. Want me to kiss it better?"

"No," Meredith glared at him. "That's what got me into this in the first place. Stupid boy penis."

Mark laughed and stood up. He grabbed the bottle of ibuprofen off the counter and passed it to her. "You really like that phrase."

Meredith gulped down two of the tablets with a coffee chaser and kept glaring, though he could see the relaxed pleasure in her eyes. "Yep."

"Hey," George greeted them as he walked into the kitchen. He stopped abruptly and looked between the two. "I don't even want to know," he commented and grabbed a mug from the cupboard.

"Stupid boy penises," Meredith muttered into her coffee mug, shooting them both a glare.

"Want me to call you in sick?" Mark offered and kissed the top of her head. "Cuz you know I will."

Meredith considered it for a moment and then shook her head. "No. I'll make it through. I'm going for a bath. You," she pointed at Mark with one slim finger. "Stay out."

Mark chuckled and nodded. Meredith walked out seemingly unaware of his eyes following her from the room. George sat down in Meredith's spot and eyed the other man. "You make her happy," he commented. "Like really happy." Mark turned his head from the door and regarded him with an upraised brow. "No. It's good. It's really good that you can make her happy," George stuttered. "She deserves it. To be happy. And you make her that way so…just don't stop. Cuz I don't think she could handle that."

Mark nodded. "I know. I don't intend to stop."

George nodded. "Good. Glad we cleared that up."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Morning Addison," Meredith greeted as she and Addison walked up to the hospital from the parking lot.

"Hey Mer," Addison nodded to her and matched her pace to the slower one of the younger woman. "You feeling okay?"

Meredith looked over and beamed at her. "I feel like I got rode hard and put away wet, but I'm good."

Meredith's candid words startled a laugh from Addison. "Well…" Addison chuckled. "A two day sex fest will do that to you."

Meredith gave her a smug grin. "I know. Lunch?" She asked as they walked into the building.

"Absolutely," Addison agreed. "And I want details. Gotta live through you since I'm not getting any."

"Pervert," Meredith laughed and headed for the elevator.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"My turn to ask you something," Mark stated as soon as she answered.

"Okay, shoot," Meredith smiled.

"Once I start working is my office going to be filled with interns every chance they have or will they just call?" His tone was teasingly put upon.

Meredith giggled. "I'll be there all the time, I'm sure. As for the others…they'll probably call so they don't have to walk in on something they'd rather not see." She flirted.

"I think I can handle that." He returned in a husky voice that drew up images of bedroom activities. "Second question: What are you doing for lunch, dinner…whichever it is for you? I'm bored."

"I'm supposed to meet Addie but I don't think it'll happen. She has a friend in town that's having surgery tomorrow. Savvy? Did you know her?"

"A bit, yeah." He answered. "I wouldn't call us friends but yeah, I know who she is."

"Hmm," Meredith looked down at her chart as she considered. "Okay. Look, call Addie for the details because I'm not even on her service or that case today. And I shouldn't have told you what I did. I just thought…Addie might need a friend today."

"I can do that." He assured her. "I'll call her. Okay, last question: I've heard from everyone already today. Cris is freaking out about her date with Burke. George is high on narrowly escaping death. Izzie is pissed at Alex for being insensitive over a double mastectomy and…oh, yeah, I'll need to call Addie. Anyway and Alex is being himself. How is your day?"

Meredith laughed slightly. "A bit boring actually. Possible gall stones. But the couple is sweet. They're older and when I was taking her blood they were listing off animals that mate for life. They were laughing together and seemed happy but he kept looking at her when she couldn't see him with this worried expression and it was just sweet."

"I can see that. I can see us like that in fifty years." His voice had gone soft and affectionate.

Meredith beamed happily. "Are you wishing gall stones on me?" She teased.

Mark's laughter rang out and made her smile with delight.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey, Angel. I was just on my way to the hospital to take you to lunch." He paused and listened to her ragged breathing for a moment. "Mer? What's wrong, Angel? Why are you crying?"

"It's not gall stones," she sobbed out. "She has four to six months. And he doesn't want her to know. Because he doesn't want her to be scared. It's…so sad."

"Oh, Angel." Mark breathed. "I'll be there soon."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

She was waiting for him in the parking lot when he drove up. The light rain did nothing to hide the tears still leaking from her eyes. Mark barely had time to get out of the car before she was in his arms and her head was buried in his chest. He just wrapped his arms around her and leaned back against the car. He pressed his lips to the top of her head and rocked her in his arms.

A few minutes later she lifted her head. "I'm okay now," she told him with a watery smile. "It was just…I hate crying."

He brushed the lingering tears from her eyelashes. "I know." He kissed her forehead and squeezed her to his chest again. "Let's go eat. We can go sit over there," he pointed to a bench set against the wall of the hospital. "And you can eat the Thai food I brought for you."

Her smile brightened. "Sounds like a plan."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Addison saw the pair tucked away on the bench as she walked out to the car to meet Savvy, Weiss and Derek for dinner. She smiled a bit at them though she knew they didn't see her. They only had eyes for each other and couldn't see anything else. The changes in Mark around Meredith were just amazing to Addison and she felt a bit envious that she couldn't have that anymore. But she was trying. She could work this crap with Derek out if she just tried hard enough. She knew she could. And watching Mark and Meredith gave her hope.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith closed her eyes tiredly and crossed her arms over her chest as she waited for the elevator. She did not want to tell Esme that she was dying. Her husband had been so adamant that he didn't want her scared before she died and now Meredith was going to go and ruin that for him. The elevator dinged and she nearly decided on the stairs. Derek lounged against the back wall.

She ignored him and pushed the button for the floor she wanted before returning to her unwelcoming posture. She heard Derek move and stubbornly continued to gaze at the elevator doors.

"So…apparently we both live on this elevator," Derek teased. She didn't answer. She was tired and sad and even dinner with Mark hadn't made her feel better about her patient for very long. She heard the snap of him closing his phone. "Meredith…" He moved to stand beside her. "You know, you could at least acknowledge that I exist," he said petulantly. When she continued to remain silent he stood in front of her.

She focused on a spot over his shoulder. She couldn't deal with this crap tonight. She just wanted to finish her shift and crawl in bed with Mark. The elevator dinged and the doors opened. Meredith nearly smiled at the sight of Addison on the other side of the doors.

Derek did a double take and frowned as he turned to his wife. If he'd had only a few more moments he would have broken Meredith's resolve.

Addison eyed them both and gave Meredith a wry smile. Derek had turned his back to Meredith and faced the doors again. "Hello, Dr. Grey," Addison murmured quietly.

"Hey, Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd," Meredith returned just as quietly.

The uncomfortable tension mounted until the elevator dinged again and Meredith moved past them to exit the elevator. She gave Addison a nod and continued to ignore Derek.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith tiredly crawled up the bed and nestled on Mark's chest. "They're going to Venice. They're going to ride a gondola under the Bridge of Sighs and be together for eternity." She mumbled against his nipple.

"Hmm?" He muttered sleepily and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"My patient, the one with the cancer. He didn't want me to tell her. She didn't want me to tell him and at the end of this month they're going to Venice and riding in a gondola. It's sweet. And romantic. And forever." Her voice was wistful.

"Mm, Venice was nice. We should go again," he murmured.

"Yeah. We will." She closed her eyes and slept.


	21. Thanks for the Memories

**Disclaimer: Nope. Still don't belong to me.**

**A/N: It's rather ironic that I'm putting this one up on Thanksgiving Day, don't you think? I seriously didn't plan it this way. I swear. Enjoy the chapter.**

**Thanks for the Memories**

"Morning, Angel," Mark said.

Meredith abruptly stopped tiptoeing out of the room and turned around. "I was trying not to wake you."

Mark grinned and stood up already dressed in his jeans. "You were trying to sneak out," he accused her. "You were trying to leave me here. Alone. With the crazy holiday lady. I'm not stupid, Angel." He pulled his shirt from the back of the chair and pulled it on. "I hate the holidays as much as you do and you are not leaving me here to deal with Izzie alone."

Meredith smiled and leaned up to kiss his cheek. "So you're coming to the hospital with me? Even though you don't start until Monday?"

"Yes," he nodded. "I figure I'll get my office set up and maybe meet some of my staff. Though I'm betting they're all at home doing the family thing."

"Probably," she agreed. "Now be quiet or Izzie will hear us."

Mark nodded and they quietly and quickly tiptoed down the stair and towards the front door. Five feet away a "Hey" stopped them in their tracks. Mark and Meredith spun around and regarded the blond guiltily.

"Hey," Mark said with a charming smile that had no effect on Izzie at all.

"What are you doing?" She asked with her arms crossed over her chest and a frown on her face.

Meredith opened her mouth to answer with a lie or something but the doorbell cut her off. "The door," she said quickly. "I'm answering the door, Iz."

Izzie's foot started tapping in irritation. "You're going to the hospital," she accused. "You can't."

"Mer has a shift. Just a few hours." Mark told her and strode forward to put his hands around her biceps reassuringly. "And I'm going with her to make sure that it's just a few hours. Promise."

Izzie glared at him and the door sounded again. "That sex appeal stuff doesn't work on me, Sloan. But fine." Meredith ignored them and opened the door. "Just be back for dinner or I'll kill you both. Painfully. Slowly. And I'm a doctor so I can kill you and then bring you back to do it again."

Mark swallowed and nodded. "Yes, Izzie. Of course." He let go of her and pressed himself to the wall as three men pounded past him yelling out "O'Malley". "What the Hell?" He asked startled.

"George's family," Meredith explained with wide eyes.

"Oh." He took her hand and they headed to the door.

"Don't forget what I said, Sloan," Izzie called after them. "I was so not kidding."

Mark shut the door behind them and leaned against it for a moment as though catching his breath. "I thought Cris was the scary one."

Meredith giggled. "More fool you then. So we have to be back for dinner then?"

Mark nodded, his eyes still slightly wide.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey Angel," Mark pressed a kiss to her lips and helped her bring her patient into the elevator. "What's up?"

"P.V.S. patient," she told him with a smile. "Fell from his bed while being turned by the orderlies. Needs a CT. And he looked at me."

Mark gave her a long considering look and then looked down at the motionless man on the gurney. He looked back up and gave her his sexy smirk. "I can understand that. You'd be enough to wake me up from a vegetative state too."

Meredith stretched up and kissed him. "Thank you. Where are you off to?"

"Izzie called. Cris and Burke are there. She needs me to run to the store for some tarragon. Apparently you don't have any that's fresh."

"Oh." Meredith frowned in confusion. "What's tarragon?"

Mark laughed helplessly. "It's a kind of spice, Angel, that's used in cooking. Don't worry about it. I'll be back soon."

"Okay," Meredith nodded. "Have fun."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

She hated having to do this. But he was standing right there and she really needed a neuro consult. So she'd have to ask him and hope that just this once he could be professional. She sent up a prayer to a God she wasn't sure existed and stepped forward.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

It hadn't been too bad. He was arrogant. But he agreed to the consult anyway. She rolled her eyes and followed him down the hall.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark breezed in the kitchen door and held out the tarragon like a peace offering. "Fresh tarragon, as ordered," he announced. "And I really hope you appreciate it. I had to fight off two huge women for that. Look one of them might have cracked a rib even." He lifted up his shirt to show off an impressive forming bruise.

"Aw, poor baby," Izzie simpered mockingly. "That's karma for you. Meet Dr. Burke." She motioned to the tall man. "Meet Mark. Mer's…whatever."

Mark lifted his hand to shake the other man's. "I'd say I was her boyfriend but that's a bit highschoolish and doesn't quite cover it."

Burke shook his hand with a pleasant smile. "It's nice to meet you," he said in a noncommittal tone.

"And you." Mark nodded.

"Go," Izzie suddenly ordered. "Go back and get Mer. Bring Alex back too if you see him. Be back here by six o'clock or I will cut your balls off and sew them on your forehead and then I'll cut your cock off and put it on your nose. Got it?"

Mark gulped, stared at her for a moment to see if she was serious and then bolted when he realized that she was.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"What are you doing here?" Alex asked as he knocked on the door of the patient's room attracting Meredith's attention. "Why aren't you at the Thanksgiving?"

Meredith looked up and smiled softly. "Why aren't you?"

Alex sighed and settled down beside her. "Okay. I tell you something you tell me something."

Meredith considered for a moment and then closed Mr. McKee's chart. "Okay. This stays between us right?"

He nodded. "And Mark right?"

"He knows my something but I won't tell him yours if you don't want me too." He smiled a grateful thank you. She paused for a moment gathering her courage. "The last holiday I ever tried to celebrate was Thanksgiving it was also the last time I ever even tried to cook anything more than pasta or eggs. I was ten. I had called the hospital the day before and knew that my mom didn't have anything scheduled. I was ecstatic. I knew she'd go in in the morning. She always did. To check on her patients and that was okay. It gave me time. I had our cook help me make a turkey and she watched and coached me on the stuffing and the pies. I made five pies. I knew it was too many but I wasn't sure what kind my mom liked. So I made pumpkin, apple, cherry, blueberry and banana crème. They looked magnificent. She would have been so surprised and I thought she'd be proud. The turkey finished and she still wasn't home. I called the hospital. She was in surgery and had another three booked after the one she was in."

"That's harsh," Alex commented, saddened by Mer's lonely life.

"I'm not finished," she told him wryly. "She finally came home that night. I waited up for her. It was elevenish. She stared at the table that I'd refused to clear and told me that everything I'd done that day was a waste of food. That there was no reason to cook all that food for two people and that I should have just had a sandwich if I was hungry. She fired the cook the next day and told the new one that I was only allowed to eat that Thanksgiving dinner until it was gone. I'd cooked it and I should eat it and learn to not waste food that way. I had turkey and all the trimmings for every meal for two weeks, even snacks. It took me years to even be able to even look at turkey again. And I still hate pie."

Alex stared at her in shock. "I…I don't know what to say. I'm…uh…I'm sorry, Mer. You must really hate Thanksgiving."

"I do. I know why Izzie's wanting the whole Thanksgiving dinner and get together thing. She likes that normal family stuff. But I never really had a family. I don't know what I'm expected to do. The only thing I know to do is work on holidays. And I'll go to her dinner and I'll pretend to be happy but every time I think about that turkey sitting in the middle of the table, waiting to be carved my stomach turns and I feel nauseous."

"Mine seems a bit petty now."

"Tell me anyway. I won't think you're more shallow than I already do," she grinned at him to show she was teasing.

"I failed the medical boards," he confessed. "And if I tell Izzie she'll be nice about it and she'll be all supportive and optimistic. She might as well rip my nads off and turn 'em into earrings."

"Alex, you should go to the dinner." Meredith told him seriously. "I mean don't tell her if you don't want to. But come home with Mark and I. You should come. It'll give me a chance to puke on you."

Alex stared at her for a moment and then laughed. "Thanks for that." He patted her head and stood up. "Yeah. I'll come but if you puke on me I might have to deck your boyfriend for moving out of the way."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Izzie, I need you to listen to me and not ask questions, can you do that?" Mark asked quickly. He was standing in the ambulance bay where he'd retreated after eavesdropping unintentionally on Meredith and Alex. Listening to his Angel talk about that Thanksgiving in such an accepting tone made him sick to his stomach. She should never have had to live with that.

"Don't tell me you guys are flaking out on me," Izzie told him in an angry tone.

"We're not," he protested. "I even found Alex for you and Mer convinced him to ride home with us."

"Oh. Then what?" Izzie asked in a confused voice.

"Make sure you carve the turkey in the kitchen before you take it to the table, okay? Please."

"Why?"

"Iz, he said don't ask questions, didn't he?" Cristina's voice broke in. "And take him off the speaker. You know this is about Mer and I'm sure she doesn't want us all to hear."

Mark heard the click of the phone switching and sighed, knowing he'd have to give Izzie something.

"You're off speaker. Why?"

"You know Mer didn't have the best childhood. Just carve the damn turkey before you take it to the table, Izzie. That's all I'm giving you. If Mer wants you to know she'll tell you."

There was silence for a moment. "All right. But I will ask her about it."

Mark cringed. "Fine," he sighed. "But wait until tomorrow at least, okay? Give her a day or two and then you can ask. She might not answer but you can ask."

"I wouldn't have asked her today anyway. I'm not an insensitive ass that abandons his girlfriend to cook all day while I'm off playing doctor. That's Alex."

"I already told you we're bringing him too."

"He's still an ass."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"What do you know? The kid came back," Derek said softly as he stood beside Meredith outside Holden McKee's room.

"Yeah," Meredith opened her mouth to say more but Alex skidded to a stop in front of them with a brunette surgical intern at his side.

"Sorry to interrupt," Alex told them without regret. "But I'm under orders to get you, Mer, and force you home. You were supposed to be off three hours ago."

Derek glared at him. "She has a patient," he pointed out.

Alex rolled his eyes. "Which is why Jillian is here," he pointed to the brunette. "Mer why don't you introduce Dr. Cross to Mr. McKee?"

Meredith nodded and motioned the other intern into the room. "Mr. McKee? I'm really sorry to interrupt but I have to leave." Coby moved closer to his father and eyed her with a sad expression. "This is Dr. Jillian Cross. She'll be taking over for me."

"Dr. Grey?" Holden asked. "Thank you. For everything."

"You're welcome," Meredith smiled.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Karev," Derek started in an irritated voice. "You can't just barge in here and pull Meredith—"

"Dr. Grey," Alex interrupted. "Her name is Dr. Grey until she tells you otherwise. She was supposed to leave three hours ago and Bailey cleared her to leave when Jillian came in. Jillian's had her Thanksgiving and now we get to go have ours. That's the way it works on holidays."

"I'm staying," Derek growled. "She should stay too."

"You can't force her to stay and she has other obligations. You're an attending. No one is forcing you to stay. You could leave at any time. You could assign this case to one of your staff. That you aren't doing so is your choice. Mer's relief came in and so it's her choice to leave." Alex paused for a moment and sighed. "Okay so it isn't, Izzie wants her home and we've all learned that Izzie's freaking scary when she wants something. Still."

"Ready?" Meredith asked softly as she closed the door to Holden's room.

Alex took her arm and led her away.

"If he chooses the surgery, I'd let you scrub in," Derek called after her.

Meredith straightened her spine and ignored him.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Mark's waiting for us in the car," Alex told her as they entered the locker room only to come face to face with Cristina and George. "Oh, Hell."

"Crap!" They all said together.

"She's gonna kill us." Meredith chuckled.

"Change, quickly," Alex ordered. "George, you can ride with Cristina. I'll go with Mark and Mer."

They all nodded and then in a flurry of flying clothing changed and raced out of the hospital.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey Iz," they chorused as they walked into the living room. "Sorry we're late."

Izzie gave them a halfhearted glare and then waved them all into seats. Alex leaned down and kissed her cheek. "At least you all made it."

"His fault," Alex pointed at Mark. "He drives really slow. Like painfully slow. And he's addicted to the hospital. It took all four of us to drag him out kicking and screaming."

Mark shot him a baleful glare. "You do realize that all of you will be paying for this disrespect starting next week, right?"

"Pardon?" Burke asked.

"Mark's the new Head of Plastic Surgery," Cristina told him bluntly. "He's our new boss and he's banging an intern before he even starts. Pretty sordid, if you ask me."

Meredith giggled and passed the potatoes. "No what's sordid is that the new Head of Plastics was banging the intern long before she was even an intern. Before she was a med student even."

"I thought…" Burke started confused.

"Mark and I have known each other for years," Meredith explained. "The summer before I started Med school. We drifted apart…sort of…" she trailed off not sure how to explain it.

"Wait," Burke said suddenly. "I get it. You're Phone Mark." Mark nodded. "Ah. That makes sense now. Thank you." He passed the cranberry sauce to Joe. "When do you start? And does the Chief know about you and Dr. Grey or will I need to keep this to myself?"

"Monday," Mark told him. He poured gravy over Meredith's mashed potatoes as she buttered his roll. "And I told the chief about me and Mer before he even offered me the job."

"Ah." Burke smiled and leaned over to kiss Cristina's cheek.

"So in punishment for leaving Preston and I to cook alone, you five have to give us the skinny on what happened at the hospital today." Izzie ordered and tore a bite out of her roll with her teeth in threat.

Mark swallowed and stared at her for a moment. "I set up my office," he blurted. "Stop giving me the evil eye, Iz. You're freaking me out."

Izzie gave an evil laugh that sent shudders down even Burke's back. He eyed her with a new appreciation. Izzie turned to Alex.

Alex tried to seem immune to the evil eye and shrugged. "Lots of sutures and a raisin stuck in a kid's ear. Her cousin dared her."

"Guy swallowed a wishbone," Cristina offered with a frown. She only wished her angry glare was as effective as Izzie's.

"My brother shot my dad in the ass," George blurted. "I had to dig the bird shot out. Of my dad's ass." He shuddered.

Meredith grinned when that look was directed to her. "I woke up a P.V.S. patient just by talking to him. Okay so the fall probably did it but I was the first person he saw in sixteen years. It was a good day."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Izzie stared around at the people talking and laughing at the table and smiled. Burke, George and Alex were using their potatoes to illustrate as they discussed something or other. Joe and Mark were laughing at something Cristina had said. Meredith and Walter had their heads close together as they whispered to each other. This might not be a traditional family, she decided. They might put the fun in dysfunctional. But they were a family and she was more than happy to be a part of it.


	22. Much Too Much

**Disclaimer: Not mine. I promise. I just like to play in this sandbox. Seriously.**

**A/N: WARNING: Sex in this one too. Be forewarned. There will be a lot of sex scenes from here on out. I mean come on it's Mark and Mer! **

**Much Too Much**

"There's a boy in my bed," Meredith told Cristina quietly over her cell phone trying not to snicker and wake Mark up. He had to start work today but he could still sleep for a few hours. It wasn't as though they'd gotten much sleep the night before.

Cristina snorted in mirth at Meredith's joke. The girl was definitely loopy this morning. Drunk on sex and love. "What's his name?"

Meredith bit her lip to stifle the laughter. "Um…Steve. Yeah, he's a Steve."

Cristina laughed again. "Where'd you find him?" She continued the silly game.

"Uh," Meredith froze as Mark stirred and then he settled again. "Joe's. I found him at Joe's."

"Mmm," Cristina hummed and pulled her toothbrush out of her mouth. "Guess where I am?"

Meredith abandoned her game for the new track in Cristina's thoughts. "Where?" She asked interested.

"Burke's apartment. He went to the hospital." She spit a mouthful of suds into the kitchen sink. "He left me here alone."

Meredith snickered. "You're going through his stuff aren't you?"

"Oh there's no stuff to go through. It's a freak show. I mean you could do surgery in here." She walked around staring at the living room with a tinge of apprehension. Who lived like this? "Oh," she moaned as she spotted his books. "He arranged his books using the Dewey Decimal System. Mer, I'm scared."

"Get out." Meredith advised strongly. "Get out of the house now."

"Who are you talking to?" Mark asked sleepily.

Meredith frowned over at him. "Cris. She's at Burke's." She turned back to the phone. "Seriously get out now. That's freaky and wrong and scary. And I have to go. Call me if you need a quick getaway." She flipped the phone closed and crawled out of the chair. "Uh…" she grinned impishly. "I have to go shower." She told Mark hoping he'd play along. "And when I get back you won't be here. So, um…good-bye Steve."

Mark laughed, leapt from the bed and chased her to the shower.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith giggled when Mark caught her at the door of the bathroom and tickled her ribs lightly. "Steve, hunh?" He growled in her ear. "Do I really look like a Steve to you, Angel?"

Meredith hummed a bit and leaned back against his broad chest. "Not really. It was the first name that popped into my head when I was talking to Cris." She admitted and wiggled until her robe fell off of one shoulder. "Wanna take a shower with me?"

Mark's hand left her ribs and settled on her hips. He pulled her flush against his hardening arousal. "Do you really need to ask?"

She pushed back against him. "Guess not," she pulled from his arms and leaned over to start the water.

He grinned at her delectable ass and reached forward pushing the robe down her arms and then pulling it the rest of the way off when she stood up. "God, you're beautiful," he whispered. He turned her around and put one hand on the back of her neck to pull her to his lips while the other reached over her shoulder and pulled the shower curtain almost closed. "You'll look even better wet and hot and wanting, though."

She smiled against his lips and pulled away again. The smile never faltered as she took his large hand in her own small one and unerringly guided him into the shower. She shivered just a bit as the water hit her back and he pulled her to him again.

He pressed her against the wall and claimed her lips while his hands roamed and squeezed. Meredith passed her own hands over his chest and back and dueled his tongue with her own.

Minutes, hours, days passed as they explored each other endlessly. Finally Mark's hands slid down her back and cupped her ass, lifting her. Meredith wrapped her legs around his waist and gripped his strong shoulders in her tiny hands to steady herself. "Mark," she whispered and blinked the water from her eyes.

He put one hand on the back of her neck again and pulled her lips back to his as he entered her. His skin quivered in reaction at the feeling of her surrounding him. She felt like home. She always had. He lapped at her lips and pressed her back against the wall again. He set his feet firmly on the no-slip mat and pulled almost all the way out before ramming home.

Meredith grunted at the force of his thrusts and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Mark," she breathed out again. "Right there," she panted. "Oh God! Right there."

He heard her and thrust harder white noise filling his ears and his breath puffing heavily against her neck. She was still so tight. So hot. So perfect. Her hands scrabbled against his back, nails digging in as she moaned and panted and cried out his name. "Mer," he panted into her ear. "I love you, Angel."

Her inner muscles squeezed him rhythmically bringing him over the edge right behind her. "Love you too," she gasped out.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I have to sign some papers with the chief," Mark told Meredith as she and the others headed for the door. "So I'll see you for lunch?" Meredith nodded and held her head up for a kiss. Mark watched Izzie and George make their way out the door. "Angel," he whispered against her lips. He pressed something into her hand. "In case you need a hidey-hole." He smiled that soft, special smile and then turned and bolted up the stairs.

Meredith looked down at the object in her hand. "Oh. Wow."

Izzie came up beside her and looked down at the key in Meredith's hand. "What is it?" She asked.

"The key to his office," Meredith grinned. "He said it was in case I needed somewhere to hide."

Izzie squealed and gave her a tight hug before frowning in mock anger. "Bitch," she muttered. "So not fair."

"Suck it up, Barbie," Meredith teased back. "You have your own arrogant ass."

"Mmm," Izzie shrugged and headed to the jeep.

George contemplated sharing Izzie's revelation about Alex with Meredith but decided that Izzie's wrath just wasn't worth the momentary amusement he'd share with the green eyed woman.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Oh no, no, no, no," Addison said quickly as she strode into the chief's office. "I'm signing first. I want seniority."

"It'll be all of two minutes, Addie," Mark laughed but handed over the pen to her.

"I need all the help I can get with you," she grinned and signed her name to the contract in front of her and then held the pen in a tight grip. "Has anyone told Derek yet?"

Mark shook his head and pried the pen from her fingers. "Jeez, Addie let me sign my contract. Or don't you want me here?"

Addison shrugged. "I was trying to hold out for five minutes. Told you I'll take all the help I can get."

Mark laughed again and passed his contract to Patricia before he nodded to the chief and headed out of the office. "Later Chief. I have to go accost some interns…well, one anyway."

"Not inside the hospital, Sloan!" The chief shouted after him uselessly.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith cradled her coffee in her hands and slumped next to Cristina on a bench. "Mmm, you got out safely then?" She asked with a laugh.

Cristina cleared her throat, transferred her coffee to one hand and reached in her pocket with the other. "Not quite," she answered and pulled out a shiny silver key.

"Burke keyed you," Meredith asked astonished.

Cristina hid the key away again. "Got freakin' keyed before coffee," she groused.

Meredith chuckled and pulled out her own new and shiny key. "Me too."

"Except you wanted it…didn't you?" Cristina asked. "And he's already living with you. Wait! What's the key for?"

"My new hiding spot," Meredith told her mysteriously. "Though he has one too. It's for his office."

"Bitch," Cristina whined. "That's the kind of key I could handle."

"Izzie called me a bitch too." Meredith laughed.

Cristina scowled. "Don't compare me to Barbie. It just proves that you are a bitch." She lifted her coffee to her lips.

"Excuse me?" A dark haired, tan man asked them from a few feet away. "I need a bit of help. You work here, right?" They both nodded. "I'm…uh…having a little problem," he said uncomfortably. "Actually I'm having a-a big problem." Cristina and Meredith exchanged glances. The guy was kind of creepy. He had his jacket on backwards and hanging off his elbows.

"What is it, sir?" Meredith asked. He suddenly dropped his jacket off of one arm. Cristina leaned forward.

"Hi. I'm Cristina." She said in a tone that Meredith had never heard before. He gave a small smile and a wave.

"Steve." He wondered why that made them both snicker but dismissed the thought as unimportant in the face of his situation. "I really think I need a bit of help. It's been like this for hours." Meredith's eyes widened as she finally caught sight of the problem.

"Oh my."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey Angel," Mark whispered against the back of Meredith's neck in front of the nurse's station. "What have you got going on?"

"Mystery priapism, no E.D. drugs or so he claims," she told him bluntly. "You?"

"Ouch," Mark laughed. "And I'm spending the day stuck in meetings with my new staff. We still on for lunch?"

"Yep." She grinned over her shoulder at him and then pecked his lips before ducking under his arms and heading down the hall. He watched her hips sway as she walked away.

"Dude," Tyler laughed. "You got it bad."

Mark only grinned at him.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey," Mark set his tray down at the table of morose looking interns. "What's wrong?" He sat down beside Meredith and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before turning his attention to the group of interns.

"Bailey called for a neuro consult on the priapism case," Meredith grumbled. "And he keeps shooting me looks. Amused looks. And using double meanings. Like he's finding this case so terribly funny. I'd break _his_ penis if I hadn't sworn it off. Maybe I still could. Addison would help. She has access to it anyway. Stupid boy penises." She leaned against Mark and thumped his chest for laughing at her

"Burke asked me to move in with him," Cristina scowled and gave out her important news of the day. "I don't wanna move but he says he can't keep taking the steps."

"Quints are in trouble. Three of them need surgery. And the mom is freaking out. Her triplets are all sick at home." Izzie stabbed at her salad. "And I want sex and Alex is being a bit reluctant about it."

"I'm just tired," George groaned. "You two are loud and you stay up all night and you keep me up. I want to sleep and I'm on Burke's service today and he's not in the best of moods."

"That's what they invented ear plugs for Georgie," Mark grinned and Meredith just shrugged. "There's not really anything you can do about the quints until they're born, Iz as for Alex, want me to tie him up for you? Kinky girl. And you two," he used his fork to motion to Meredith and Cristina. "Same as Izzie. Want me to tie them up? Cris, you can tie Burke up and take over his apartment. Angel, I'll put him in the basement and you and Addie and the others can use him to practice surgery. Cuz that's all I got."

All four of the interns laughed. "Can't you just see Addie doing a C-Section on her own husband?" Izzie giggled.

"Ooo, I wanna check his aorta and shred it and then repair it," Cris volunteered.

George snickered. "I'll have Jerry shoot him in the ass and then take out the bird shot without anesthesia."

Meredith only covered her mouth with her hand and giggled helplessly.

The morose mood had lifted and they all started chattering like normal. Mark sat back, satisfied with his work for the moment.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith scowled at Derek's back as Steve clung to her hand. "I'm sorry," Steve said quietly and let go of her hand. "He's…um…being a bit…"

"Inappropriate?" Meredith supplied. "Yeah. And don't be sorry. This doesn't actually have anything to do with you."

Steve stared at her with a knowing look. "So…what's the story then? With him. One night stand gone wrong?"

Meredith chuckled and shook her head. "Not quite." She turned to leave but his voice called her back.

"Stay, please," he asked uncomfortably. "Tell me this story. The pain meds haven't kicked in yet. Talk to me. Take my mind off of the pain."

Meredith gave him a shrewd look. "Okay," she finally allowed. "But just to let you know I do have a boyfriend."

He rolled his eyes and sighed. "Of course you do." He suddenly straightened. "It's not that Dr. Shepherd guy is it?" He swallowed and stared at the door.

"Nope," Mark laughed and put a hand on Meredith's back. "It's me. No coming onto my girl, okay?" He waited for the other man to nod. Mark turned his attention back to Meredith. "I'm off but I'll wait if you want me too." Meredith grinned and nodded. "Okay, then, I'll be in my office when you're ready."

Meredith kissed his cheek and Mark sailed out the door with both of them watching him. "I can see why Dr. Shepherd isn't your boyfriend now," Steve chuckled. "If I wasn't as straight as a ruler and thinking of vowing off sex forever right now I'd fight you for him."

Meredith giggled and settled into the chair by Steve's bed to keep him company until the meds kicked in. He was very sweet and though he hid it rather well, very scared.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark looked up with a smile when the lock on his door turned. Meredith poked her head around the frame and grinned. "Ready to go? I need a ride. I let George have my jeep since you waited for me."

"Angel I'm always ready for you," Mark smirked that sexy smirk and stood. "But yeah. Let's go home."

"Does Derek know that you're here yet?" Meredith asked after they reached the parking lot.

"Well, since he hasn't come barging into my office to yell at me yet, I'm going to go with no. I'm honestly not hiding from him. We just haven't managed to cross paths yet."

"You know you're lucky, right?" Meredith giggled.

"How so?"

"If he was Bailey he would have known before your plane landed."

"Yep."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Tired, Angel?" He asked softly in the darkness of the quiet car.

She slowly turned her head to him. Sleepy green eyes blinked and she smiled. "A bit but not so much that I don't know we have the house to ourselves."

His teeth flashed white with his grin. "We do at that," he acknowledged. "What are we going to do about it?"

She grinned impishly, unbuckled her seat belt and opened the door on her side of the car. "Let's see if I can't break your penis," she teased and then bolted out of the car and ran to the front door.

Mark laughed and rolled his eyes. Like she hadn't tried that one before. He hopped out of the car and chased after her. He loved chasing her; the rewards when he caught her and he always caught her were incredible.


	23. Owner of a Lonely Heart

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy and its characters are not mine. I also make no money from entertaining you.**

**Owner of a Lonely Heart**

Mark leaned a shoulder against the doorjamb of the NICU room where the quints were being kept. He watched the five interns monitor their babies and smiled. He wasn't sure when these five, well four, people had infiltrated his lonely life but they were all there. Under his skin and inside his heart. Meredith had been there since the first day he'd seen her in Madrid. She'd stolen inside him with her pretty white dress and her bright green eyes.

"I have the best quint," George announced, suddenly, breaking Mark from his memories. "Lucy—she just smiled at me." He looked over his shoulder at Izzie with a smirk.

"She's nine hours old, George," Izzie reminded him with a roll of her eyes.

George frowned at her, mock offended. "I'm sayin' there are five babies here, and clearly, mine is the advanced one."

"Charlotte's smart," Meredith joined the argument firmly. "She's got wrinkles on her forehead—very serious."

"Okay 'A' this is not a competition," Izzie informed them. "And 'B' my quint kicks your quints asses. Emily's strong. She won't let go of my finger."

"Hey," Cristina joined the argument. "Julie has her organs on the outside of her body, and she's still alive, thank you."

"Kate's the best one," Alex said smugly. He turned to face Izzie's back. "Izzie," he started quietly.

Izzie didn't turn. "Leave," she bit out.

"Can we please just talk?" Alex asked.

"You're too busy screwing nurses to talk. Just get out."

Alex sighed. "Can someone make sure that Kate's vitals remain stable?" He asked in a louder voice.

"I will," Meredith volunteered.

"Hey, Dr. Sloan," Alex greeted as he passed him on his way out.

Mark nodded at him in greeting.

"He is unbelievable," Izzie grumbled. "I am so glad I never slept with him. Which is his loss, because I'm really good in bed—mind-blowing—mind-blowingly good in bed."

"Are you trying to seduce us?" Cristina asked with a snicker.

"It's working for me," Mark commented and strode over to stand behind Meredith. He put his hands on her shoulders, laid his lips on the top of her head and stared down at the tiny baby in the incubator. "She's cute."

"And then he sleeps with Olivia instead of me. And I'm not sleeping with you, Dr. Sloan," Izzie snarled. "Mer's sitting right there. God! What is wrong with you men?"

"Hey," Meredith objected. "I highly recommend sleeping with Mark. He's good. I mean like phenomenal good. But since you're being mean then you can't sleep with him." She tilted her head back to look up at Mark. "No sleeping with Izzie. Seriously. And no sleeping with Olivia either. I don't trust her to be careful."

Mark let out a gusty sigh and nodded. "If you insist."

"You know," George glared at Izzie. "I slept with Olivia."

"Yeah? Well, then you both have bad taste," Izzie told him waspishly.

George's glare intensified and he leaned towards Izzie. "You know, you can't say that you weren't warned." He stood up and moved so that he could see her face. "Alex has always been Alex."

"Why are you even surprised?" Cristina asked. "You sleep with a snake. You get bit."

"It'll get better, Iz," Meredith told her. "You can't sleep with him but I'm sure if you don't wanna cry on my shoulder then you can use his. He's much better at comforting than I am. But I'm here for you if you need me."

"Thanks guys," Izzie said sarcastically as her eyes filled with tears. "For the support. And Mer, yeah, you're crap at comforting but it's the thought that counts right?" Her voice was sincere at the end.

"Who's on call tonight?" Bailey asked as she breezed into the room. "And what the Hell are you doing in here distracting my interns?"

"I am," Izzie turned to face her. "And he's only been here for a minute. He wanted to see the babies."

Bailey's glare never left Mark's too innocent face. "All right. The rest of you go home, sleep." She ordered. "You too, Sloan. And I mean, sleep." She looked around at the babies as they stood up, stretched and grabbed the charts for the babies. "All five quints are still alive. It's a good day." She turned around and walked out of the room.

Mark paused beside Izzie on his way out. "You gonna be okay? We can stay if you need us."

She gave him a watery smile. "I'll be fine. Go on."

Meredith squeezed her shoulder and Izzie laid her cheek against Meredith's hand. "I wish I was better at comforting you, Iz."

"You're trying. That's enough, Mer. It does help." Izzie shooed them from the NICU and buried her feelings in monitoring the quints.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You okay?" Mark asked her gripped her small hand in his own as they trekked out of the hospital.

Meredith nodded silently. "I'm fine," she said.

Mark squeezed her hand to make her look at him and gave her the look. She hated that look. It meant he knew she was avoiding something and she needed to face it. She held her silence and shot him her own look. The one that said back off. He didn't, of course he didn't.

"I'm fine," she insisted. The look got a bit more demanding. "Fine! Really, Mark, I'm fine. I'm just worried about Izzie and Alex. He's so in love with her and he screwed up. And I hate it because there's nothing I can do about it. I want to tell her to just forgive him already. He's like you."

"Yeah, yeah he is." Mark sighed and finally looked away. "Angel…I'll support Izzie whatever she decides but…well, Alex he's more my friend than she is. And she's a bit judgmental. She's not going to forgive him easily if at all. She's not like you."

She lifted up on her toes and pressed a kiss to his jaw. "Yeah, I know." Then she grinned. "No one's like me. I'm special. Unique."

Mark's blue eyes softened in wonder at the amazing woman he'd lucked into six years ago. He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers in a soft kiss. "You're extraordinary."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Addison!" Meredith called early the next morning as she made her way into the hospital alone for once.

Addison turned from the coffee cart and smiled at Meredith. "Good morning, Mer."

"Hey," Meredith grinned when she caught up to her and ignored Derek who was standing beside her. "You're here early."

"I wanted to check on the quints," Addison admitted.

"I know the feeling," Meredith nodded. She waited while Addison and Derek placed their orders and then stood beside Addison while they waited for the coffee to be ready. "Did Izzie need any help last night?"

Addison shook her head. "I didn't hear a peep from her. Are you not drinking coffee this morning?"

Meredith laughed and held up a thermos. "I brought some from home. Columbia's finest. Rich, dark and chock full of caffeine." She unscrewed the cap and wafted the steam under Addison's nose.

Addison's eyes rolled back in her head and she pretended to swoon. "Oh. My. God. Where in the Hell did you get that? I hate you. It smells exquisite."

Meredith laughed again. "I have connections," she said mysteriously. "Grab an empty cup and you can have some. I brought it for Izzie, actually, but there's plenty and I have a friend that is going to bring me more later if I need it." The two women exchanged a knowing look that left Derek feeling left out and in the dark.

"I didn't know the two of you were such good friends," Derek finally found his tongue. When had this happened? He wasn't altogether sure this was a good thing. Weren't wives and mistresses, even ex-mistresses, supposed to hate each other?

"I don't have to tell you who I'm friends with Derek," Addison told him and held out an empty cup to Meredith with pleading eyes. "Mer's my friend. Not yours."

"There you go," Meredith said as she finished filling Addison's cup. "Gotta run. Want to take this to Izzie before rounds." She sped off at a quick jog.

Derek watched her quickly retreating form in bemusement. Had she really just spent that entire conversation without looking at him a single time? He refused to believe that she'd moved on from him already.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith dropped off the coffee to Izzie and then ran to the locker room to get her scrubs on. George kept pace with her as they left to find Bailey. "Wanna go to Joe's tonight?" He asked. "You and Mark?"

"Are you asking me out on a date, George," Meredith gently teased him. "Cuz you know my boyfriend could snap you like a twig, right?"

George rolled his eyes and bumped her shoulder with his own. Seeing Meredith and Mark together had finally cured the last of his crush on her. She was still one of his best friends and he loved her but only as he would a sister. "Sure. A date, Mer. With your boyfriend, of course. We'll all three get drunk and then we'll have a threesome and tomorrow we'll all puke our guts out because we're too much like family to ever be that drunk."

Meredith giggled and opened her mouth to say something but they were interrupted by the squabbling voices of the Shepherds. "What are they arguing about?" Meredith wondered quietly. "I just saw them a few minutes ago and they weren't fighting then."

"I thought you were over him," George said. "Why do you care what they're fighting about?"

Meredith rolled her eyes at him. "Because Addison is my friend and I'd like a head's up on what she's going to be bitching to me about later."

"Oh." George was quiet for a moment. "They're fighting over the trailer. She wants him to move into town or something."

"Okay, thanks, George and about tonight? Sure. Unless something comes up. I'm sure Mark will come too."

"Cool," George headed down a corridor and Meredith set off in search of the other interns.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So I hear your day has been eventful," Mark murmured against the back of her neck in the elevator. They were alone for the moment and he'd always loved that spot on the back of her neck. He loved it when her hair was up and he could rub that spot with his lips. Or when her hair was down and he could bury his fingers under her hair and rub at that spot with his thumb. It always made her melt against him.

"Mmm," she murmured leaning against him and letting the bliss of his attentions shoot through her system and give her a boost of comfort after a stressful morning. Sure it had been the good kind but it was still a bit draining. "A bit. Charlotte's lung collapsed. I got to put the tube in her chest. It was scary and great at the same time. I love being a doctor."

Mark chuckled and wrapped his arms around her in a quick hug. The elevator bell dinged and he let her go so she could head back to the NICU.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

_Gonna have to cancel on lunch. Helping Alex find something to help his patient. Love you. In the NICU if you wanna stop by._

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey guys," Mark said quietly in deference to the sleeping babies. His eyes caught on Meredith's dozing form and he shook his head fondly. Silly woman, she shouldn't have drunk so much of that coffee. "I brought you food. It's just sandwiches but…"

Alex gave him a small smile. "Thanks man." He took the sandwich offered to him and nudged a dozing Meredith.

"What?" She spluttered and sat up. "Damn coffee. Got me all chirpy and high and now I'm crashing."

"Food," Mark held out the sandwich and chuckled. "It'll perk you up…and that's my doctorly opinion."

Meredith beamed at him. "Thanks." She took the sandwich and watched quietly as he leaned over Kate's incubator.

Mark stared down at the tiny form and smiled. "She's so cute," he murmured. "You are, you know?" He kept whispering to her but Alex and Meredith couldn't understand what he was saying.

"Man," Alex breathed out. "Did you know he liked kids that much?"

Meredith nodded. "You know, you guys are lucky," she caught Alex's eye. "You didn't get the Mark Sloan experience." Alex gave her a questioning look. "He's not good with people until he gets to know them. He's arrogant and abrasive and rude and likes to make inappropriate comments. You guys don't have to deal with that. He got to know you before he ever met you so he lets his guard down. You'll see his other side eventually but he'll never aim it at you."

"Good to know," Alex nodded. He opened his mouth to say more but stopped as Izzie walked in and looked over at them.

"Unbelievable," Izzie said in a dead tone before storming out of the room.

"Izzie," Meredith called after her. She looked over at Mark, he nodded to her to follow her friend and she bolted out the door after the taller blond while Mark claimed her seat and opened the book to help Alex. "Izzie, come on."

"Come on? Come on?" Izzie repeated and ripped her lab coat off of her shoulders. "You're fraternizing with the enemy, and you tell me to come on?"

"Alex and I are sort of friends," Meredith tried to explain.

"Since when?" Izzie spat out as she continued to storm down the hallway. "Since when are you and Alex friends?"

"Since forever, Izzie, how could you not realize this?" Meredith stopped chasing her when Izzie stopped and turned to face her. "And he's friends with Mark so it's kind of mandatory that we tolerate each other."

Izzie glared even harder at her. "You all tell me to cut my losses, that he's a loser and I'm better off without him and then you go and make friends with him because your manwhore of a boyfriend likes having a little mini-manwhore around?" She turned around again and started heading down the hallway.

"Izzie," Meredith followed her. "You're making way too big a deal out of this."

"Right, of course, because I'm the unreasonable one." Izzie threw over her shoulder. "You know what, Meredith? Do whatever you want! Sleep with them both for all I care."

"I'm not going to sleep with Alex," Meredith yelped. "That's…ugh."

"Why not? You'd probably like it and you'd let your manwhore boyfriend watch."

"Stop it," Meredith felt her own temper rising. "What is wrong with you? I never told you to cut your losses. And since when do you have a problem with Mark? I thought you were friends with him."

Izzie stopped and looked over her shoulder at Meredith again. "Just leave me alone, Meredith. I don't need your pity or your 'we're friends' speech. Just…just leave me alone."

Meredith stopped chasing Izzie and watched her walk away. She shook her head in despair and decided to let Izzie have her space. She didn't want to ruin what was left of their friendship. She silently asked herself what she'd done wrong.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

_Can't make Joe's. I'm on call. I'll be in Mark's office if you need something. Trying to get some sleep. Or in the NICU with Charlotte._

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

_Yeah, none of us can make it tonight. Cris is stuck with her patient. Heard she swallowed a light bulb. Izzie's with you. And I'm still working with the leeches. Did Mark go home?_

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

_Nah, he's camped out in his office. Says the house is too quiet with all of us here. See you in the morning if not before. And Alex is with his patient. Doesn't think he should be alone._

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark leaned against the door jamb of the NICU and stared hard at the blond monitoring the babies. "Dr. Stevens," he said in a low tone.

Izzie looked up and glared at him but her voice was professional when she answered. "Dr. Sloan."

He sighed and rubbed at his beard with one hand. He sat down beside her. "We're going to drop the professional stuff for a moment," he told her. "Look, Izzie, you were a bit out of line today. Meredith has been doing her best to give you the support you need. And you threw it in her face. She's not good with comfort or support but she's doing her best. And Alex? Yeah, he screwed up."

"They're all—"

Mark held up a hand. "No. They're not all. Meredith hasn't."

"She would go running to tattle," Izzie sneered.

"Isobel Stevens," Mark barked with a glare. "I know you're hurting. Christ we all know you're hurting. That doesn't give you the right to lash out at the one person trying to help you. Knock it off and stop hurting her or you're going to lose her. Mer can't handle the lashing out, she's not Cristina. She's had few enough friends in her life that she doesn't need you taking your hurt and anger out on her for no reason. You wanna yell at someone? Yell at the others for being unsupportive. Yell at Alex for being a bastard. But leave my girlfriend alone. And she didn't tell me a damn thing. One of the nurses heard you yelling at her and told me. Mer clammed up like she always does when something hurts her." He stood up and with a last glare at Izzie's shocked face he left the room.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey Iz," Meredith said hesitantly while she checked on Charlotte one more time before heading to check on Dorie. Mark had said that Izzie was just lashing out at everyone and she'd been a convenient and easy target. She still had no clue how he'd heard about the argument and he wasn't talking.

"Mer," Izzie said softly. She'd done quite a bit of thinking after Mark had left. "I'm sorry for earlier." She whispered, her voice filled with shame.

Meredith put a hand gently on her shoulder and squeezed. "It's all right, Izzie," she said just as quietly. She was glad that Mark had been right. Not that she'd ever actually tell him that, his ego was nearly too big to handle already.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"That was the longest day," Meredith mumbled as she curled up beside Mark on the couch in his office. "I don't ever want to do that again."

"Do what, Angel?" Mark asked. He put the file he was studying down and pulled her onto his lap. He loved holding her. She ran around all day being her…all competent and efficient and strong. And he loved that too. But he loved it just as much when she went all soft and let him be her strength. There was a primitive thrill in such a strong woman letting him take care of her for a while.

"Izzie's baby died." She said quietly as though saying the words too loudly would cause untold damage. "She's a wreck. I thought about taking her to get a dog but we all work too much. So I just let her lean against me for a while. Then we went to play with the kids in the daycare. Izzie really likes kids. When I left she was teaching them 'If You're Happy and You Know It'. She'd be a great mom."

"Mmhm." They sat together in silence for a few moments. "Ready to go home?" He finally asked.

"Mm," she agreed. "Let's go get Iz and we'll go. George already left."


	24. The Neurosurgeon or the Boxer

**Disclaimer: Not mine. Sorry. I know you keep getting your hopes up but it's just not happening.**

**A/N: Yes, finally, the chapter you've all been waiting for. Hope you enjoy it. **

**The Neurosurgeon or the Boxer?**

Derek roamed the halls looking for Meredith the night after Izzie's quint had died. She and the others should be off shift by now. Alex and Cristina were coming off of their forty-eight for the week and Meredith, Izzie and George had only worked a twelve today. He was fairly sure that Meredith hadn't left the hospital yet. Though his information seemed to be a bit slower getting to him than it had before Addison had shown up. He couldn't help but wonder what Meredith Grey had that drew people to her in such protective ways. Even Addison had fallen under her spell and had become friends with her so easily.

"Dr. Shepherd," one of the nurses called out to him as he walked past one of the trauma rooms.

He turned and tried to hide his sigh at the interruption. "Yes?"

The nurse's frown never wavered. "We need a consult on this patient, Dr. Shepherd. I'm fairly sure it's nothing more than a concussion but neuro needs to check him before he can be discharged."

Derek rolled his eyes but followed the nurse into the room. The movement of a few people outside of the room in the corner of his eyes caught his attention. He turned his head and narrowed his eyes. What the Hell was he doing here? And what was he doing with them? How had he met Izzie and Meri? Why were they laughing with him?

He had to stop this catastrophe before it spread. Mark had no business here. Mark should never have set foot on this side of the country. He had to have been mistaken. That couldn't have been Mark Sloan with Meredith and Izzie. It just couldn't.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Daycare, Izzie, really?" Mark teased her now that the issue wasn't quite so sensitive. "Never knew you liked kids that much. I'd be happy to help if you'd like." Mark pushed open the door to the main corridor and held it for the two women, that cocky McSteamy grin pulling at his lips.

Izzie gave him a confused look for a moment before blushing while Meredith giggled. "Shut up, Sloan," Izzie grumbled. "I'm not ready to have my own yet but the daycare was fun. I haven't played like that in years." Izzie good naturedly poked Mark's chest as she passed him. "And I'm not having your kid, Sloan, that's Mer's job."

"You're sure?" Mark grinned down at her. "You and me would make some fine lookin' kids you know? All tall and leggy and smart and stuff. My kids with Mer have a much higher chance of being short. Like terminally short. They'd be smart and all, but short. Our kids now, they'd be all tall and blond and blue eyed. They'd be the American dream. We really would make us some great kids, Iz."

Izzie stopped abruptly and gaped at him while Meredith covered her mouth with her hand and giggled. "You would," she agreed between breathless giggles at Izzie's expression. "You really would."

Mark's cheeks dimpled in his delighted little boy smile that he rarely used. And then he was on the floor and his hand was holding his cheek. "What the Hell?" He muttered even as Izzie screamed and Meredith stood in front of him with her back to him.

"What do you think you're doing?" Derek's voice shouted.

Mark hefted himself to his feet and tried to move Meredith and now Izzie behind him and away from Derek. They weren't budging though and before he could blink it seemed that all five of the interns and Bailey were standing between him and Derek. His ears were ringing with the shouts and snarls and then Addison and Chief Webber were facing them all. Addison's eyes narrowed on his cheek and then on Derek's furious expression before she huffed and grabbed Derek's arm to pull him a few steps away from the group of interns.

Derek glared at her as he stumbled back and then dismissed her from his attention as he glared back at the interns. Meredith caught a glimpse of the pain on Addison's face and gave the other woman a nod of support.

Derek caught the nod but was cut off by a furious voice practically hissing at him. "What are you thinking?" The chief stood right in front of him and leaned in until their noses were nearly touching. "This is a hospital! Punching people out in a hospital? Where is your head, Shepherd?"

"But…do you know who that is?" Derek whined and spluttered at him with another furious glance at Mark over the chief's shoulder. Mark was still hidden behind three of the five interns. Izzie and Meredith were standing on either side of him with Izzie patting ineffectually at his shoulder and Meredith smoothing a hand over his bruising cheek. Derek was only sorry he hadn't had a chance to put his rings back on.

Addison grabbed his hand and checked his knuckles before give him a reproachful glance. "You need to ice this," she stated and started to pull him from the hallway.

Derek shook her off and started towards Mark again but Bailey joined Cristina, Alex and George in the barricade between them. "No way," Bailey shook her head and glared. "Go ice your hand and cool down, Shepherd. Before you get yourself suspended for attacking another department head."

He didn't get a chance to say anything as Addison and Richard each took one of his arms and pulled him down the hallway. His last glimpse of the group was of Bailey pushing George and Alex out of the way and tilting Mark's head so that she could see his cheek.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Just bruised," Bailey pronounced. "Go home, ice it and I'll see you six in the morning. You know there's going to be a meeting with the chief in the morning. Damn fools. Messing with my rounds schedule."

"Keep your schedule the same, Bailey," Mark half ordered. "There's no reason to get any of the interns involved. This is between me and Shepherd and they were just doing what any person would do when witnessing an unprovoked attack."

Bailey rolled her eyes at him and snorted. "Unprovoked? Really, Sloan? You really expect me to buy that one?"

Mark frowned. "Okay, so I probably deserved the hit. Notice I didn't even attempt to hit him back? But I didn't even see him coming. I had no warning and I didn't even know that he was in this corridor."

"He was teasing me and Mer," Izzie butted in. "Really. None of us even saw Shepherd. Then all of a sudden Mark's on the floor and…what happened?"

Meredith patted her shoulder and shook her own head in confusion.

Bailey huffed at them all and shrugged. "I'm sure you'll all find out tomorrow so for now go home and sleep and be back here before pre-rounds. Got it?"

The interns nodded and wandered off to get changed. "You going to the chief?" Mark asked. Bailey nodded. "Try to keep them out of it, yeah?" Mark asked. "They really don't have anything to do with this mess."

"Oh I know," Bailey scoffed. "Except that Grey dated Shepherd and he sees you with her and goes ballistic. She's in this to her pretty little neck."

Mark glared at her. "No. She's not. No matter my relationship with her or Derek's. This is between him and me and she's just stuck in the middle. I put her there and I'm sorry for that but I'll be damned if I'm giving her up just to keep him happy. He chose Addison not Meredith."

Bailey grinned at him. "You ain't so dumb then, Sloan. Still a damn fool but not a dumb one."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Seriously Derek," Richard collapsed at his desk and glared at the neurosurgeon. "What the Hell is wrong with you? Punching someone in a public hallway?"

Derek took the ice pack from Addison and placed it over his hand while he glared at them both equally. "You don't have a clue who that man was or why I punched him so why are you on my ass?"

Richard rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I know exactly who he is," he pointed out. "Dr. Mark Sloan. Formerly of Mt. Sinai in New York and new Head of Plastic Surgery at Seattle Grace in Seattle. Your former best friend and the man who slept with your wife—"

"If you know who he is then why the Hell did you hire him?" He growled out. "And what the Hell was he doing with Meri?"

Addie sighed and glared at him. "You know she hates being called Meri, Derek? And of course Mark was with her. She's his Angel. Are you really that dense? His being in Seattle has absolutely nothing to do with me and everything to do with your ex-mistress."

Derek choked on his own breath and stared at her in confusion. "What did you say? His Angel? The Angel?" He'd been hearing about Mark's Angel for years but he'd never paid much attention.

Richard rolled his eyes. "I hired Mark Sloan for Meredith. He was moving out here to…well, hold her hand through this stuff with you and Addie and he would have gone to one of the other hospitals but he's one of the foremost plastic surgeons in the world and I couldn't pass up the chance to have him here."

"You hired the man that slept with both my wife and my girlfriend? Have you lost your mind?" Derek screeched. He couldn't process the Angel bit. It was too ludicrous that Meredith was Mark's Angel. It wasn't possible.

Addie couldn't stop the giggle that burst from her at his affronted tone. "Sorry," she apologized. "But that was hilarious. I told Mer you'd freak." She forcibly calmed herself down and tried to take Derek's hand in her own. He pulled it back and glared at her hotly. "Mark and Meredith have known each other for years," she explained. "She's his Angel. The one he's talked about for years. You broke her heart and she didn't know that he was the same Mark. He told her and she still asked him to visit. He came for a visit a few weeks before Thanksgiving and decided it was time to get a fresh start. He moved here because she's here and in spite of the fact that you and I are here. I really think he would have moved to the Sahara if she'd asked."

"You've lost it as well," Derek accused. "It's Mark. He'll never make her happy. He's only going to hurt her." He knew he'd made almost the same predictions six years ago and it hadn't happened yet but that didn't matter because Meredith could not possibly be THE Angel.

"That's none of your business," Richard declared, reentering the conversation. "You gave up that right." He sighed again. "Look, I don't care what your personal feelings are so long as they stay out of my hospital. You will be professional here. With both of them. Or I will find myself a new Head of Neurology. Got it?"

Derek scowled but nodded. It didn't matter what he promised Richard he'd be talking to Meri about her rotten choices. And he'd keep a very close eye on that bastard Mark Sloan as well.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Dude, you shoulda hit him back," Alex told him as the five interns joined him at the elevator. "He woulda so deserved it."

Mark shrugged and pulled Meredith to him. "I did actually deserve that punch. I did sleep with the guy's wife."

"He should have done something then," Cristina said. "Not waited months."

Mark rested his chin on the top of Meredith's head. "Derek's always liked his brooding. I actually expected him to brood a bit more once he realized I was here and then punch me."

"Yeah, well, he's not getting another chance," Meredith said fiercely. "I'll snatch his hair out first."

George snickered. "That'll show him. Make his perfect head of hair a bald one. Then he'd be McPoolball or something instead of McDreamy."

"Ooo," Izzie giggled. "What about McCue?"

The other four interns grimaced at that one. "Too James Bond," Cristina finally said. "What about McEgg?"

"Sounds like something from McDonald's," Meredith giggled.

"I know," Alex said in a smug voice. "McShiny. Makes it sound like a compliment but it isn't and he'll never know we're making fun of him."

"I like that one," Mark approved. "Everyone agreed?"

There were nods all around.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Angel?" Mark whispered against her shoulder. "It's time to get up, Angel." He nibbled the light freckles he found there. He'd wondered once upon a time if freckles tasted like cinnamon. They didn't but on Mer they tasted so much better. He didn't think he'd ever get enough of her. "C'mon Angel," he coaxed. "Wake up."

"Idonwanna," Meredith muttered. "'Msleepin'."

Mark chuckled and ran a hand down her back. "You're going to be late if I let you sleep any longer," he told her.

Meredith frowned grumpily and turned over. One hand flashed out and thumped on his chest. "I don't like you." She blinked up at him and then smiled softly. "Though you are very hot. Maybe I'll keep you anyway."

Mark grinned down at her. "Good," he whispered and claimed her lips again. He nipped at her neck lightly with his teeth after he was finished ravishing her lips.

"Get up, you two!" Izzie's voice interrupted them only moments later. "It's time to go to work!"

"I am up!" Mark shouted back irritably.

Meredith giggled when she heard George's choking and Izzie's groan. "Shut up, Sloan!" Izzie yelled again. "You know what I meant!"

Mark flopped back on the bed and threw an arm over his eyes. "I hate your roommates," he groaned.

Meredith giggled again and placed a sweet kiss on his cheek before getting up and heading to the bathroom. "We better hurry before they barge in here."

He pulled his arm away and glared at the ceiling. Damned roommates.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

The meeting with the chief went about how Mark had expected it would. Richard warned him to be professional with Derek and not to start anything. Derek had glared at him through the whole meeting.

"Before this meeting officially finishes," Mark said as Richard prepared to dismiss them. "I'd like to make one thing very clear to Dr. Shepherd." He waited for Richard to nod and then he regarded his former friend seriously. "That was your only free shot, Derek. I won't let you hit me again. I deserved that one but I won't let it happen again." He decided not to tell him the plans the others had made if he even looked at Mark the wrong way again. He would be in a world of pain if he crossed the line again.

Derek snorted. "Stay away from Meredith Grey. She's not a toy and she won't want anything to do with you when she finds out what you are. Leave. No one wants you here and you'll only hurt her."

Mark resisted the urge to laugh. He only shook his head and stared Derek down. "Mer knows me better than you think and I'm not leaving until she asks me too." He nodded to Richard and stood up. "Mer's not your obligation anymore, Derek. She has me and the other interns to take care of her. She doesn't need you. You stay away from her." Not waiting for an answer he strode from the room and went to check on his angel.


	25. Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer

**Disclaimer: Still not mine. I'm really serious this time. Besides…they keep killing off all the cool characters and leaving us with the not so dreamy (in my opinion) McDreamy.**

**Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer**

Mark spent the next few weeks before Christmas avoiding Derek to the best of his ability. It wasn't easy. It seemed as though everywhere he turned Derek was there watching him with his glares and his pursed lips. Derek seemed to be constantly monitoring the on-call rooms in the hopes of catching he and Meredith doing something. He never had cottoned on to the fact that neither of them trusted the on-call rooms. They preferred his office for their quick trysts and even those were rare.

Meredith actually preferred for her workday to be about work and not their relationship and sex life. An attitude that for all his manwhore tendencies and devil may care personality Mark could understand and agree with. Work was for working. Sure they met every day they could for a meal usually with their friends and sometimes for a quiet together time in his office but they focused on the work when they were in the hospital.

It hadn't taken long for everyone else to realize that while Mark and Meredith were together they were also completely dedicated to their jobs and were trying their best to be mature about their relationship. Both professional and personal. Mark didn't ask for her to be on his service at all, though he happily took her when she was assigned to him. He didn't favor her and when she was assigned to him he was always happy to see her but didn't give her privileges she hadn't earned. She did spend quite a bit of time with him in surgeries but she had proven to him and everyone else that she deserved to be there. She knew the answers to any question he put to her whether it was relevant to that day's surgery or not.

Derek could only watch the two of them in impotent fury. He never requested Meredith for his intern either and would have welcomed any excuse to keep her out of the OR. He knew he couldn't do anything more than be overly cold toward her though. Too many eyes were watching them. So all he could do was wait for Mark to hurt her and for her to come to her senses. He had no faith in his one-time friend. Mark was going to break Meredith's heart and he would be there to pick up the pieces.

Christmas was only a few days away. Everyone was gearing up for the holidays but Derek just couldn't bring himself to find any joy in the season. He hated all the twinkling lights and the cheeriness. He hated that Meredith seemed to be walking around on a perpetual cloud. She smiled all the time. It was nauseating.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith quietly made her way into her house. Everyone else should be home. Izzie'd had the day off, George had gotten off about five hours earlier and Mark had gone home at three. Usually Mark waited around for her and caught up on paperwork but he'd said he wanted to do some Christmas shopping so she'd happily waved goodbye when he'd found her charting at one of the nurse's stations. She'd never been a big fan of holidays but something told her this Christmas would be different. She had Mark and he was the best present Santa could ever have brought her.

She stopped dead as soon as the door shut behind her. Her living room looked like something out of a Norman Rockwell painting. Suddenly she remembered why she wasn't big on holidays. Too many twinkling lights and the smell of pine and cinnamon was nearly enough to knock her down.

Izzie glided around from the far side of the huge tree, hanging even more glittery objects on it, just as George stumbled down the stairs and skidded to a stop next to Meredith. "It looks like Santa threw up in here," he mumbled with wide eyes.

"Just go with it," Meredith mumbled back. "We're being supportive. Where's Mark?"

George snorted. "He's escaped the madness. He's still out 'shopping'. I think that's code for copious amounts of alcohol."

Meredith rolled her eyes and shook her head. Izzie finally looked up and grinned at them. "Oh! Hey!" She spun around in a half circle indicating the room around her and ignoring their no doubt glazed smiles. "What do you think? Did I go too overboard?" Her smile dropped. "Oh, I know. I know sometimes I can go a little overboard."

"No, it's great," Meredith assured her.

"We love it," George told her at the same time.

Izzie's smile returned and lit the room with its brightness. "Oh! Yay! I love Cristmas." She turned back to a box of decorations.

Meredith and George's smiles became more fixed and fake. "Oh, we know," Meredith said mechanically.

"Clearly," George nodded.

Meredith and George watched Izzie prance around the room for a few more minutes before slowly backing from the room. Meredith turned to go up the stairs to change and wait for Mark in the sanity of her hopefully Christmas free room. She'd made it up three steps before the front door opened and Mark breezed through with his arms full of boxes. "Hey," he grinned up at her. He peeked into the living room and lifted an eyebrow. "If you already had so many ornaments why did you send me for more?" He called out to Izzie.

Izzie beamed brightly at him. "You can never have enough at Christmas." She took some of the boxes from his arms and set them down. He followed her and set the rest beside them. "Thanks, Mark."

He nodded and backed away from her. "Well, I need to go shower," he announced. "And change and then I'll come back and help."

Izzie waved him and the others off happily and dug into the boxes with a small cry of joy.

Mark grabbed Meredith's hand as he passed her on the stairs. Izzie would be happily occupied for a while with the decorations and George could find his own entertainment. A shower with his Angel would be the perfect start to the evening.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

The five interns walked down the corridor behind Bailey watching her warily. "Look at her belly," George whispered. "She's almost as wide as she is tall."

"Are her ankles swollen?" Meredith whispered back. "Is that why she's waddling?"

"What's going to happen to us when she goes on leave?" Izzie asked in a borderline scared tone.

"Leave?" Cristina asked excited. "She's going on leave?"

Meredith rolled her eyes even though she knew that Cristina couldn't see her. "What do you think happens when people push babies out of their vaginas?"

George guffawed while the others snickered. "Do you think we're going to get a new resident?"

Alex, walking at the back of the group still in disgrace for sleeping with Olivia, rolled his eyes. "Nah, they'll probably just let us all wander around unattended to see how much damage we can do."

"Yeah, well you would know," Izzie snarked at him. Meredith sighed, she was beyond ready to forgive Alex but Izzie was still holding a grudge. "Hey, you guys, we should all get together and get Bailey a Christmas gift for the baby, or we could organize some sort of secret Santa thing."

Cristina sighed. Why was everyone so interested in Christmas? "Okay, listen Tiny Tim you can take your—"

"Sounds great," George and Meredith moved in front of Cristina blocking Izzie's view of her.

"Secret Santa sounds great, Izzie," Meredith echoed.

"Okay," Izzie beamed happily.

Meredith and George turned around and gave Cristina angry looks. "We're being supportive," Meredith hissed at Cristina's confused look.

Alex rolled his eyes at them. "Sure, take her side," he grumbled. Meredith glared and he swallowed heavily and ran to catch up to Bailey. At least she wasn't after his blood any more than she normally was.

Bailey looked over her shoulder at them and huffed inaudibly. She sped her pace a bit so that they were forced to hurry after her.

Meredith pushed through the swinging doors last and at the sound of a "Hey," from behind her wished she'd been first. Knowing there was no help for it she turned to face Derek.

"Hey," she answered inquisitively.

"So?" He stared a bit sadly. "Um…"

"What's wrong?" She asked with a glance towards Bailey and the other interns. "You seem a bit down."

"Nothing," he gave her a seemingly brave smile and she resisted the urge to roll her eyes at his little boy manipulations. "Just…holidays."

"Oh," she said quietly. Was he missing home? "Yeah. They can be difficult."

He gave her a soft look with his soulful eyes. "So…plans for the holidays?" He asked.

She shrugged. "Not really. Mark wants to go to Venice but I can't get the time off so we're staying here."

"Venice?" He asked with a raised brow. "Why Venice? And why does Mark want to go there? Not really his scene."

Meredith laughed. "You want the truth or the not quite truthful, protecting Mark version?" He merely crossed his arms over his chest. "Right the truth then," she giggled. "For all of his playboy manwhore ways, Dr. Mark Sloan is actually a romantic sap. We were in Venice six years ago and I loved it so he wants to go back."

"Grey!" Bailey yelled down the hall and Meredith left a stupefied Derek to run down the hall.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You busy today?" Meredith asked Mark quickly.

"Not really," he answered and checked the calendar on his desk to make sure. "You wanna meet me in an on-call room?"

"Gross! No. Your office later is a yes though," she grinned. "But that's not why I called. I need a favor. A big lover type favor."

Mark rolled his eyes at her. "Baby, no matter how much you beg me I am not doing your Christmas shopping for you. That's something that you have to do for yourself."

"So not the favor I need. My shopping's done, goof. I just need you to go to the basement, find Alex and help him study. Please?" She tried to transfer as much begging as she could into that one word.

"Study for what?" Mark paused. "Oh, his boards. I'd forgotten."

"You knew?"

"I…uh, overheard at Thanksgiving." He admitted.

"Oh. So will you?"

"As soon as I finish the consult I have scheduled. Shouldn't be more than an hour and a half."

"Thanks. I owe you." She grinned happily.

"You can pay me back tonight," he said in a seductive tone. "In the car. By the ocean."

"So dirty," she teased and hung up.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey Alex," Mark greeted the man on the gurney. He sat down next to him and pulled the book from his grasp. "So I've been falling down a lot lately. And my joints hurt when I walk too far."

"She told you, didn't she?" Alex asked with a frown. "I thought I could trust her."

"She didn't tell me," Mark refuted. "I overheard the two of you. Now, back to my exam? I swear the things I do for that woman."

Alex cracked a grin. "Any other symptoms?"

"Numbness and a sensation of cold in my legs sometimes." Mark answered and sat back against the wall.

"Spinal stenosis," Alex diagnosed. "As for the irrationality? Well, that's what you get for falling in love with a truly exceptional woman who knows how to manipulate you. Before you object I know and you know that you love every second of it."

Mark grinned. "I wasn't going to object. She is exceptional and I do love her. As for the manipulation…well, the rewards are so very worth it."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hello gentlemen," Meredith grinned at Mark and Alex.

Mark stood up swiftly and crossed over to her. She held up her lips for a quick kiss. "Hey, Angel."

Meredith grinned up at him. "I'm here to relieve you."

Mark's shoulders sagged in relief. "Oh thank God."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Do you know where I can buy a large, extra thick strawberry milkshake?" She asked him quickly.

He laughed and sat back in his chair. "Go to the cafeteria and tell them it's for Bailey. Jennie will make it just the way she likes it."

"How did you know it was for Bailey?" She asked even as she headed for the cafeteria.

"I was there the other day when Bailey was," he answered with a shrug and looked up at the sound of a knock on his door. "Call you later, Angel. Got company."

"Okay."

"It's not locked," he called out and the door swung open. The dark haired neurosurgeon stood on the threshold making no move to come in the rest of the way. "Dr. Shepherd?"

"Venice, Mark, really?" He sneered. "You are aware that she can't swim right? Are you trying to off her?"

Mark folded his hands behind his head and leaned back in the desk chair, stretching his long legs out and smiling at his former friend. "Yeah," he breathed dreamily. "I know she can't swim, but she loves the gondolas. And can't you just see all the pretty lights on the water this time of year? Too bad we can't make it this year but there's always next year."

Derek scowled at him and pushed away the irritating, nagging thought that he'd never seen Mark like this. "You really expect her to still be with you next Christmas?"

Mark's eyes focused on him again. "Yep. And the one after, and the one after that and so on for the next hundred years or so. We'll get to Venice on one of them."

"Venice? Who's going to Venice?" Addison asked from the hallway. She poked her head over Derek's shoulder and grinned at Mark. "You're taking Mer to Venice? Yay! She loves Venice."

Derek shot her a furious look. "How the Hell would you know that?" He growled.

Addison frowned back at him. "She told me." Her gaze left him and moved back to Mark as her smile returned and became impish. "She's told me all about your previous Venice experience."

Mark groaned and thumped his head on the desk. "God! I should have known better than to encourage her to make friends with you."

Derek scowled at them both. Meredith was not an angel and she sure as Hell wasn't Mark's Angel. "She's going to find out what you are eventually and then she'll walk away." He warned heatedly.

Mark burst into laughter and Addison giggled. "She already knows exactly what I am," Mark said between laughs. "She's known that I'm a manwhore since the day I first met her in Madrid. She's always known. She's not going to leave me over my past."

Derek countenance darkened. "She'll kick you to the curb when you cheat on her though. You should walk away now before you hurt her."

Addison stopped giggling and Mark stopped laughing. He stared up at Derek expressionless. "Like you did?" He snarled. "I told you before that Meredith was no longer your concern. Let it be, Dr. Shepherd and worry about how much you're hurting your wife with this unreasoning clinging to your ex-girlfriend." Derek huffed and stormed away. "I'm sorry, Addie," Mark said softly.

"It's okay," Addison said in a wounded tone. "He'll come around. Eventually. I hope."

Mark gave her an encouraging smile. "Me too. If he doesn't we'll still be here," he promised.

Addison gave him a watery smile and followed her husband.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith headed for the doors of the hospital hoping Mark didn't have anything fancy planned. She'd brought her jeans and a long-sleeved shirt to change into today. Not exactly dinner wear. Though she guessed he wouldn't care much. He loved her dressed up but he loved her in jeans too. Besides they were going to end the night overlooking the sea from the cliffs in the car.

"Hey," Derek's voice called out behind her.

She stopped and took a deep breath before turning to face him. "Hey," she answered.

Derek stepped up beside her and they walked towards the doors together. "So…busy day," he observed.

"Yeah," she nodded.

"Look, Meri, about you and Mark—"

She held up a hand. "I've already heard it, Dr. Shepherd. You weren't exactly quiet in Mark's office earlier and some of the nursing staff heard and they told me. I know what you're going to say and I don't want to hear it." She took a deep breath of the cold air and smiled. "I'm not stupid. I've known Mark for over six years. I know what he's like and I don't need you trying to ruin it with your misplaced protectiveness. Leave us alone." She hurried her pace and headed for the car waiting at the edge of the pavement for her. She never looked back at him as she opened the passenger door and disappeared inside.

"Merry freaking Christmas," Derek muttered.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark parked the car at the top of a bluff overlooking the ocean. Once the engine was silent he could hear the water breaking along the shore. He sighed and leaned his head back against the headrest. This was nice. Soothing. Quiet.

"You okay?" Meredith asked him in a hushed voice.

He turned his head to her and opened his eyes. He smiled. "I'm good," he slowly reached out a hand and slid it behind her neck. "Just…this is nice."

Meredith smiled a joy filled smile. "It is." She let the silence surround them for a few more minutes. "But you know what would make it better?" She finally broke the quiet.

Her tone was teasing and he couldn't have stopped the short chuff of amused air that escaped him if he'd wanted to. "What?"

"Sex." She informed him matter of factly. "You promised me sex, Sloan and so you'd better follow through. Now." She leaned over the space between their seats and claimed his lips with her own.

He used his strong arms to pull her to him. This was good. This was much better. "I didn't promise you sex," he finally told her.

She giggled. "You implied it and face it, you're Mark Sloan. You always mean sex."

"True." He agreed and used one hand to pull the lever and push his chair as far back as it would go. He pulled her over into his lap and frowned a bit. "I didn't think this one through very well, though. This is going to be a bit uncomfortable."

She shrugged. "Only because you're like a giant, if you were a bit shorter then this would work a whole lot better."

He gave her that slow, sexy smirk. "I make everything better," he boasted and pulled her head back to his.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I don't think I've ever been more grateful for your manwhoreness," Meredith said as she stumbled inside her house laughing. It was difficult to walk with Mark attached to her back like a limpet. He had his arms wrapped around her just under her breasts and wouldn't let go.

"Oh no," she gasped as they stopped in the entrance from the foyer to the living room. "The tree's eaten Izzie." Mark laughed and squeezed her a bit before letting go and stepping up beside her. "It's pretty though." She continued. "For a carnivorous plant." They stepped closer to Izzie's form sprawled out with her head under the tree.

"Yeah," Izzie said softly.

Mark crouched down beside her legs and put a hand on her knee. "Whatcha doin'?" He asked her gently.

"Everything looks so pretty from down here. So simple." Izzie breathed out.

Meredith shrugged at Mark and crawled to lie beside Izzie. She took the other woman's hand in her own and stared up at the lights. Mark took Izzie's other hand and did the same. The three of them simply lay silent, watching the lights.

"What are we doing?" George asked in a low tone a few minutes later.

"Lights," was Izzie's only response.

George set down the book he was carrying and hurried to Meredith's other side. He joined them on the floor and took Meredith's hand in his own to complete the chain. Bracketed by the two men, Izzie and Meredith had the same thought. Family wasn't always the one you were born into. Sometimes it's something much greater. Because it's the people you choose. Izzie squeezed the hands holding her own and let their warmth fill the cold empty places in her heart.


	26. Begin the Begin

**Disclaimer: Not mine. Never has been. Never will be.**

**A/N: Okay, this is the last chapter of this story that I'll be posting for a few days. I've got five other stories going at the same time now so…yeah I'll still be posting a chapter every day but I'm alternating between stories. There are two Sherlock stories, two Grey's stories (including this one) and two crossovers (one Harry Potter/Sherlock and one Harry Potter/Grey's Anatomy). I hope you check them out as well. Let me know what you think of them and yes, before you can say it I am an idiot…too many projects going at the same time.**

**Begin the Begin**

Meredith handed Izzie and George their travel mugs of coffee and grinned at their bemused looks. "It's the good stuff," she told them.

Izzie eagerly took the cup and inhaled the rich aroma. "But this is your Christmas present," she weakly protested.

Meredith nodded with a shrug. "I know. But I wanted to share the goodness." She swept up her own travel mug and the thermos on the counter after handing George his mug. "Let's go or we're going to be late."

They followed her from the house to her jeep. "Where's Mark?" Izzie asked when she noticed his BMW missing from its usual spot.

"He left early to do a surgery on a traffic accident victim. Guy got hit by a car the other night and hit the pavement face first."

"Ouch." Izzie and George chorused.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey, guess what? I'm off until noon. Great right? So I'm heading home. Eighty hour work week is being enforced. Call me when you're finished with your surgery. Love you."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You're bored out of your mind, aren't you?" Mark asked her with a laugh.

"No," she replied in a defensive tone. "I have plenty to do. Laundry. Shopping. Um…reading?"

"Sure, Angel," he drawled.

"Fine," she huffed out irritably. "I'm so freaking bored."

"So sneak back in and come help me with my paper work," he offered.

"I might just take you up on that," she smiled. "As soon as I finish folding this laundry and visiting mom."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith stared hard at the dark haired man getting coffee at the nursing home where her mother was living. What the Hell was Derek Shepherd doing here?

"What are you doing here?" She stormed over to the coffee dispensers and whisper yelled at him.

He looked down at the floor with that little boy look that screamed 'I'm too cute to be angry with'. "There is a clinical trial to study the progression of early on-set Alzheimer's." He was rather proud of himself for finding this trial and trying to get Ellis into it. It was something Mark would never think to do.

Meredith's eyes widened and then narrowed in a fierce glare. "Okay, me, you can screw with. My mother? No, not acceptable." Who did he think he was and what kind of game was he playing now?

"Look," he pressed. He had to get her to agree to this trial. It would help him pull her away from Mark. "There's been some really promising results from similar studies in Europe." She was shaking her head and backing away. "Your mother is a prime candidate."

"My mother is very sick and has very few good days and I don't want her being poked and prodded for some experimental program." She spat out furiously.

He nodded seriously. "I'm just trying to help," he told her.

She drew in a deep breath and continued to glare at him. "I know that. But why? And does Addison know you're doing this for me?"

He chuckled a bit. "No. No she doesn't, but she'd be okay with this. She's your friend, Meri. She'd be happy that I'm trying to help your mother and you know it. It's Mark that wouldn't be happy, isn't it?"

She stepped back, stung. "No. No, he wouldn't be happy about this. But not for the reasons you're obviously thinking."

He smirked at her. "Are you sure? Mark could be jealous. He could find out and think that we're sneaking around behind his back. Or he could be thinking I've shown him up. Which would be true. I don't see him here with ideas to help."

She backed away another step and stared at him as though he had grown another head. "He used to be your brother," she said harshly. "Do you even know him at all?" She turned away and went to greet her mother.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

His office door was locked when she got there. She frowned at it and then pulled out her key. "Mark?" She called softly into the dark interior after she'd opened the door. She flipped on the lights and sighed. "Damn." The office was empty.

Shrugging she crossed the room and booted up his computer. She still had three hours before she was due back at work. She'd surf the net until Mark came back. Maybe she'd find some information on this study Derek was talking about.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith sat in the gallery. The internet had been a bust and Mark was in surgery. She'd found a bit of information on the trial that Derek had mentioned but it had been sketchy and uninformative for the most part. Mark was the tech whiz. Meredith preferred paper.

"Hey," George greeted and sat down beside her. "Aren't you supposed to be having free time?"

"Oh," she blew out a frustrated breath. "I did five loads of laundry, cut my split ends, studied, cleaned out the fridge. Free time sucks."

George laughed. "You wouldn't be saying that if Mark had been off too."

Meredith nodded. "True." They watched the surgery on the author in silence for a few minutes. "So what have you been doing today?" She finally asked him.

"I've got this patient," he confided in a low tone. "Teenage girl. Young. She's a hermaphrodite. And she doesn't know. Her parents won't tell her. She says she's always felt like a freak. I think telling her would help. If it were you wouldn't you want to know sooner rather than later?"

Meredith thought about it. "I don't know," she finally allowed. "I mean I can see what you're saying. But I can see their side too. Being a teenager is hard already. And now she'd have this giant decision hanging over her head. It could make her feel better to know or it could confirm to her that she's a freak. I really can't help you out here, George. And really it's up to the parents to decide. I mean, I know she'll find out eventually. Something like that can't stay a secret forever."

"If they don't tell her now she'll never forgive them," George predicted direly. "They shouldn't let their freak out about this affect the way they deal with her. It's not right."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Mark!" Dr. Webber called after the taller man. "Dr. Sloan!" Mark turned to face him. Richard stopped beside him. "Could I speak to you privately for a moment?"

"Sure," Mark nodded and looked at his watch. "Mer's around somewhere and I was going to go to lunch with her before her shift starts but I have a few minutes."

Richard sighed in relief. Derek thought the proposal of the trial would be better coming from him but Mark could and would be more capable. He explained the trial Derek had found and all the particulars to the younger surgeon.

Mark crossed his arms over his chest and regarded the Chief soberly. "I can ask her, Richard," Mark finally said when Richard had finished. "But that's all I'm willing to do. Her relationship with her mother has always been rocky at best and I won't put more strain on her. I'll ask her and I'll explain the trial…but if you want someone to talk her into it you'll have to find someone else."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Richard found her at the nurse's desk writing in a patient's chart. He walked over to her and stood at her elbow. "This program Derek looked into was a favor to me," he told her quietly.

She looked up from the chart and over at him with an understanding smile. "Nice try," she commented.

The Chief sighed heavily. "Sometimes, Meredith, a favor is just a favor. This treatment won't cure your mother. It won't give her a new lease on life. But it may give her more good days. I urge you to consider it."

Meredith gave a silent nod and he walked off. Mark had told her everything the Chief had told him and she was seriously considering the trial option. She just wasn't sure if she wanted her mother to be more aware. She well remembered exactly how much her mother had been disappointed in her and she wasn't unaware that she would still be disappointed no matter what she did. She kind of liked the mom that thought she was a friend. That would laugh with her. The one that wasn't convinced her daughter was the worst failure of her life.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

For once it was her waiting on him. She had brought reinforcements of course. Mark held onto her hand. He'd been adamant about being with her when she talked to Derek. He didn't want Derek upsetting her. She was touched by his protectiveness but maybe she shouldn't have told him what Derek had said that morning.

The elevator dinged. Mark and Meredith turned towards it. "Derek," Meredith stated when he came abreast of them. Derek stopped and turned. He glared at Mark for a moment and then gave all of his attention to Meredith. "Tell us about the trial, please." She half ordered.


	27. Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

**Disclaimer: Nope. I still haven't convinced them to give me Grey's Anatomy so it's still not mine.**

**A/N: Okay so this chapter is out earlier than I'd predicted. I'm putting the order of the stories I'm posting on my profile page so that we can all keep track of them. They'll be posted one chapter per day in alphabetical order. Hey, my mom's and english/math teacher and a librarian how else would I arrange a posting schedule? The only story not in the schedule is Sherlock and the CHS but that's because I'll update that one when I can. Now on with the story.**

**Tell Me Sweet Little Lies**

Softly, slowly he ran a finger along her spine. He loved her back. It was one of the many things he'd fallen in love with about her. It called to him more than anything else this morning though. Her back laid out bare in the early morning sunshine. Calling for his fingers to stroke and his lips to kiss every knob of her spine. There really was no reason for him to resist it. So he didn't.

She woke to a mouth sucking gently at her back. One large hand rested lightly on the top of her ass with the fingers trailing soft patterns. She felt extremely lazy with this quiet early morning attention. She kept her eyes closed and concentrated instead on feeling. "Hey," she husked out quietly.

"Morning, Angel," he mumbled around one of the bumps his lips seemed so attached to. Sharp teeth bit down softly and she let out a wordless hum of contentment.

He lightly kissed each knob along her back on his way up. He placed a single sucking kiss on the spot on the back of her neck that made her melt and pulled her against his chest, spooning around her. Cradling her. Blocking out everything outside of their small bubble of universe.

Mark and Meredith dozed in each other's arms, content. "It's time to get up," he whispered to her too soon.

"Mmm," she hummed back. "Why?"

Mark let out a light chuckle. "Work, Angel. Lives to save."

"You suck," she pouted. "I'm comfortable and warm and happy. Let me stay. You stay. Sleep."

"Okay. But when Bailey fires you don't come crying to me." He tightened his arms and closed his eyes, sinking back into the contented silence.

Meredith pressed back into his warmth and sighed happily. "Meredith!" Izzie yelled from the hallway. "Get up!"

"Dammit!" Mark growled. "Go away! We're sleeping!" He shouted at the door.

"No!" Izzie yelled back, clearly amused. "We have to work!" She banged on the door. "Up and at 'em!"

Meredith groaned and rolled over to face him. "Are you absolutely sure I can't kill her?" She asked seriously.

He somberly pondered it for a few moments and then let out a gusty sigh. "Yeah. You can't kill her, Angel. But if she's ever on the table we'll be really slow or something."

"Meredith Ellis Grey and Marcus Jacob Sloan! Get your asses out of bed before I come in there and make you!"

"Crap!" They moaned at the same time and slipped out of the bed.

"We're coming!" Meredith yelled.

"I didn't need to know that," Izzie laughed.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith watched the surgery in the O.R. from the gallery alone. It was a boring, routine mole removal and so no one had joined her. She wasn't interested in the surgery itself so much as she was the surgeon. Mark was amazing in the O.R. So focused and intent even with a simple mole removal. And he was teaching, which was amazing on its own. He hated interns and he hated teaching. But it was Alex with him this morning so maybe that explained things. He liked Alex as a friend and so he taught him the art of plastics.

The door opened quietly and Cristina walked in, gave her a small smile and looked out the viewing window to see what was happening. She frowned in boredom and moved over to Meredith.

"Why aren't you prepping for rounds and stealing all the good cases?" Meredith asked her without taking her eyes off of Mark.

"Well, why aren't you prepping for rounds and stealing all the good cases?" Cristina shot back.

Meredith shrugged. "I have a quick meeting with McShiny," she said unconcerned.

Cristina plopped down in the seat beside her. "I'm avoiding Burke," she announced in a dull tone.

"Why are you avoiding Burke?" Meredith asked and bumped her shoulder against Cristina's in a show of support.

Cristina sighed softly. "He thinks I moved in with him." She turned her head to look at Meredith. "Your mom and the clinical trial?" She asked and bumped Meredith back.

"Yeah. Why does Burke think you moved in with him?" She finally tore her eyes from Mark and took in her person's defeated expression.

Cristina shook her head and didn't answer her. Moments later the door opened again and Derek's head popped in. "You ready?" He asked Meredith and ignored the angry Korean girl with the glare.

Meredith nodded and stood to follow him out the door.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Thank you for doing this," Meredith said politely as Derek drew blood from her arm. "The needles and the blood," she clarified. "They won't accept her without a full family history."

Derek gave her that charming smile that had caused Cristina to dub him McDreamy. Meredith wasn't altogether surprised that it didn't affect her at all anymore. "I'm happy to get your mom in the trial, Meri, even with the needles and the blood."

He stood up, still with that McDreamy smile. She kept her face impassive and stared at him. He shifted uncomfortably. "Done?" She asked.

"All done. How's it feel?"

"It's fine," she told him impassively. "And please stop calling me Meri. I hate that name. Even if we were friends I'd hate that name. And we're not friends so I really don't like it."

"Mer," Cristina's voice called from the doorway of the exam room they'd appropriated. "Rounds. Like now."

"Coming," Meredith jumped off of the bed and strode to the door and her best friend. They walked silently down the hallway to meet with Bailey for a few minutes before Meredith couldn't take it any longer. "Burke 'thinks' you moved in with him?" She asked again. "What does that mean?"

Cristina's defenses were up again though and she stared straight ahead. "Okay, it's not important," Cristina dismissed.

Meredith rolled her eyes, knowing that Cristina would break soon enough.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I get to work with your boyfriend today," Cristina sang out as she caught up to Meredith at the nurse's desk. "And you don't. Ha!"

Meredith rolled her eyes. "What are you doing?"

"Reattaching fingers. Fun, right? But I kinda think it'll be useless. The guy smokes."

"Maybe he'll quit. We have to give him the chance, Cris."

"Yeah, that's what Sloan said too. You two are freaky." Cristina shook her head with a frown.

Meredith grinned. "Well, I get to do a valve replacement with your boyfriend so it all works out in the end. And ha to you too." She turned away from the desk. "Time to meet my patient."

Cristina moaned in disappointment. "Dammit! Sometimes I really hate you, Mer, even if you are my person." She called after Meredith's retreating form.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Warm arms crept around her from behind as she waited by the window for Mrs. Cline's lab results. "Hey," she said softly and leaned back against him. "What are you doing down here?"

"Thought I'd check up on you," Mark told her and tightened his arms. "Sorry I couldn't be there when he did the vampire thing."

Meredith shrugged. "I'm fine. Didn't even hurt. Cris giving you any trouble? She's in a weird mood today."

The lab tech appeared at the window and Mark let her go. "She's fine. A bit harsh but she's Cristina so…yeah."

"Yeah." Meredith nodded. She took the paper and scowled down at it. "No drugs? That's not right. Even Izzie isn't that freakin' happy."

Mark kissed her cheek and let her run off to find Burke with the results.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey guys," Meredith greeted as she flopped down in a chair at the table. She stared at her friends and their plates piled with hot dogs in confusion. "What are you doing?"

Mark seated himself beside her and laughed. "Eating competition," he informed her and handed her a sandwich from the deli outside the hospital.

"Thanks," she told him and then looked back at her friends. "And the winner gets what exactly?"

"Bragging rights," Alex said. "And I'm gonna win. Cuz I'm the King."

Meredith laughed and leaned back in her chair while Mark wrapped an arm over her shoulders. "Not to mention the indigestion and stuff."

"Come on, Izzie," George complained. "Focus."

Izzie lifted her watch and smirked. "Fine. And…go!" She shouted.

"Your friends are insane," Meredith told Mark as they watched Cristina, George and Alex stuff hot dog after hot dog in their mouths.

"My friends?" Mark asked incredulously. "They were yours first. That makes you responsible when they're idiots."

Meredith rolled her eyes and puffed out an irritated breath before pointedly taking a small, delicate bite of her sandwich. Izzie laughed and matched her small bite.

"It's a record!" Cristina shouted through a mouthful of hot dog and threw her hands in the air in victory.

"You cheated!" Alex accused.

The three of them argued for a minute though no one could understand them with their mouths stuffed. Cristina finally swallowed her mouthful and stood up. "You wanna be me but you can't be me," she sang in a gloating tone. "You wanna be me but you can't be me." Suddenly she stopped and paled.

"Uh oh," Mark chortled and grabbed his bottle of water from the table.

"Crap!" Izzie said. "She's gonna blow!" She grabbed her own hot dog and scurried out of her chair.

"Run!" Meredith ordered with a laugh.

The clatter of chairs filled the air as they all five fled the scene as fast as they could. Cristina smirked at their fleeing backs and sat back down; grabbing Meredith's forgotten sandwich and George's juice. "I'm the Queen." She laughed.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey, wanna go to dinner at Burke and Cris' place?" Meredith asked.

"Um…Cris invited us to dinner?" Mark asked and adjusted the phone against his shoulder so he could have both hands free to write up Mr. Freeark's chart.

"No," she answered softly. "Burke. But he doesn't know that Cris hasn't actually moved in. She's left some of her stuff at her apartment and she's still paying the rent on it. So wanna go to dinner?"

Mark shrugged and made another note on the chart. "Talk to Cris first," he advised. "You don't want her to freak out and take it out on us."

"True."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Your boyfriend is amazing," Cristina gushed.

"What did he do?" Meredith laughed.

"He let me hold the finger," Cristina cheered gloatingly.

"Nice. So…Burke invited me and Mark to dinner with you two at your fake apartment." Meredith said gently.

"Crap!" Cristina scowled. "Now I have to tell him."

"You don't," Meredith disagreed. "He said I was your best friend and you listen to me. So don't tell him. Or if he finds out then tell him it was cheaper to let the lease run its course and you didn't want to pay the penalties."

Cristina nodded slowly. "Yeah, that could work."

"You'll have to give it up eventually though." She informed her. "If it's a bolt hole you need when he's getting weird you can come to mine."

Cristina put her head in her hands. "I like having my own space. And Burke's apartment isn't mine and I can't explain."

Meredith put an arm around her shoulders. "I know, Cris. Really. It's hard."

"It wasn't hard for you and McSteamy to move in together," Cristina accused.

Meredith laughed loudly. "Yeah but the privacy and space issue? That was. When we first started this…whatever it was then, in Europe we had our issues. We had arguments and break ups and angry silences over privacy and having our own space. Even after we came back and lived in different cities we still had them. It took us over a year to be comfortable calling each other at the drop of a hat or dropping in when we had the chance." She squeezed Cristina to her side. "But we fought it out. We talked…yelled and compromised. So just talk to him. Explain how you feel. If he really loves you he'll understand and he'll give you the time you need."

Cristina nodded against her shoulder. "Yeah."


	28. Break on Through

**Disclaimer: Nope. Un-unh. Not mine. Not at all. **

**A/N: Okay so I know I promised you all plenty of Mer/Mark love scenes. But…um they're hard to write. So I'm going to keep trying but I'm not promising anything anymore. If I can get the words to cooperate then you'll get your sex scenes. If not I'll give you a good lead up and then you can imagine the rest.**

**Break on Through**

They stared up at the building in a line. The shouts of the crowd held each of them frozen. "Can't…" George muttered. "Can't cross the picket line."

"I don't like it either, George," Izzie said back to him. "But what choice do we have? Okay, you took an oath to heal. You're a healer."

"My dad's a truck driver. Mom's a teacher," he said heatedly. "The evening news shows me crossing a picket line, they'll outlive me just to pee on my grave."

Cristina threw her arms around them as she ran up behind them. "Has there been any blood yet? I hear they brought in scab nurses."

"I think the nurses know that we're on their side," Izzie gave a nervous laugh. "Don't they?"

"We're doctors," Cristina said in a hard, loud tone. "We have sick patients inside." Her voice lowered. "I mean, we have surgeries."

"Okay," Izzie nodded determined and terrified. "Okay…" Her expression wavered to terrified and she turned to Cristina. "Then you go first."

Cristina's jaw dropped for a moment and then she straightened up, buttoned her jacket and glared at the mob. "Screw it," she claimed and then darted down the clear space to the doors at a run with her arms over her head.

"They threw food at her!" Izzie shrieked. "That is just wrong!" Izzie straightened her own jacket and pushed her chin up. "Fine. I'm going in." Calling on her model training she gracefully strutted to the doors. She turned around once she'd reached and looked at George. "George! Are you coming?"

"No, I'm good here," he called back.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Good morning," Mark and Meredith chorused to the receptionist.

"Meredith, Mark," the blond woman smiled happily and made googly eyes at Mark. "Good morning!"

Mark leaned a hip against the desk with a flirty smile though his hand never left Meredith's. "How is she this morning?" Meredith asked with an indulgent smile.

"Great," she informed them with a happy smile. "She really lights up when Dr. Webber visits."

Meredith gazed into the room that the receptionist was watching and saw the chief and her mother engaged in conversation. Meredith let go of Mark's hand and crept to the entrance to the room. She watched her mother laugh and place a hand on Richard's. Shrugging with a frown she took a step back. She didn't want to interrupt her mother. Not when she was happy and laughing instead of screaming out her disappointment of Meredith.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey George," Mark greeted him. "Aren't you supposed to be inside? You know, working?"

"I can't," George said quietly. "Can't cross the picket line. My parents would kill me. Literally."

Mark nodded. "Right." He looked out at the sea of shouting people and swallowed. "I'm going in the back."

"Chicken," Meredith muttered even as she allowed him to pull her away.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Oh. My. Dear. Sweet. God!" Meredith panted as she spun into Mark's office and locked the door behind her before collapsing on it. "Please, shoot me or stab me or put me to sleep."

Mark stood up from his chair and raced around his desk in a panic. "What? What is it?" He asked as he scooped her up into his arms. "Angel? What's happened?" She'd been quiet on the trip from the nursing home where she hadn't visited with her mother. That alone had started a feeling of disquiet in his gut. Now, she was freaking out and the disquiet grew.

Meredith hid her face in his solid chest to hide the smile. "There's a monster," she told him in a small childlike voice. "In the hospital. A monster! All pink and shiny and happy and oh. My. God. Heal with love? Heal with LOVE!"

Mark couldn't help it. The worry drained away and he burst into laughter. "They put the five of you with Dr. Heron?" He gasped out. "Seriously? You're going to eat her alive! I wonder who she pissed off."

Meredith pulled back and thumped his chest. "Seriously?!" She shouted. "You're seriously finding this funny?"

Mark nodded, still laughing helplessly. "They gave you to Heron," he howled and had to lean back onto his desk to keep himself from falling to the floor. "Oh good Lord. Heron with Bailey's interns. That poor, poor woman."

Meredith pulled away from his arms and put her hands on her hips. "Mark! What in the Hell is so damned hilarious?"

"You five are legends," Mark chuckled, calming down. "Bailey swears that if she wasn't pregnant she'd have ulcers."

"What?"

"You five are the most troublesome interns in the history of the hospital. But you're also the best. The other interns truly hate all of you. You get the most O.R. time and you get requested before anyone else. Bailey nearly has to fight off attendings every morning."

Meredith's eyes widened. "Seriously?"

Mark nodded. "Oh yeah. The only attending who doesn't request one of you every single day is Derek. Even Addie asks for you or Izzie every day. Bailey nearly always turns us all down and chooses herself. The chief ordered us not to argue with her over it either."

"Seriously?"

"On the other hand," Mark continued. "The five of you do things that would get any other intern kicked out of the program so fast their heads would swim. But you're so good and talented that you get by with it. Usually without even a tongue lashing."

"Wow," Meredith breathed quietly.

Mark started laughing again. "And now you're with Heron. 'Heal with love', perky Heron. I have got to find out who she pissed off. That's the only way they'd stick you with her. You're going to make her life Hell, Angel."

"Shut up, Mark."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"We're going to Joe's," Meredith announced as she breezed into his office again.

Mark looked up from his paperwork and grinned. "We are?"

"Yes. And you're coming cuz my day sucked and I want to get drunk with my lover and then go home and have amazing sex. Got it?" Meredith nodded once to emphasize her point.

Mark closed his file and stood up. "I see no problems with that plan."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Izzie, Meredith and Cristina sat on bar stools with frowns marring their faces. Mark chuckled at them a bit and watched the nurses toast George for his heroics in crossing the picket line to check on their patients.

"She called me unkind," Cristina whined finally. "Unkind and lacking in compassion in front of my boyfriend. I am not unkind!" She thumped a fist on the bar and scowled before taking a large gulp of her beer.

"I think I have to kill a woman tomorrow," Meredith said in a dead tone. "I have to take out the tube that's keeping her alive."

There was silence for a moment and then Cristina tossed a peanut at Izzie. "Izzie." She said loudly.

"This is the part where you say what's wrong with you." Joe informed her.

Izzie looked at him for an instant and then gathered up her coat and stood. "Where are you going?" Meredith asked.

"I have to—I forgot something at work," Izzie stuttered and fled.

"We don't need her," Cristina sneered.

"I have to kill a woman tomorrow," Meredith repeated.

"You know, and that's a problem why?" Cristina exploded. "I mean, if that's what she wants, that's what she wants! And that is not unkind or lacking in compassion. I'm a very compassionate person," she insisted. Mark let out a soft snort from his spot leaning his back on the bar on the other side of Meredith. "I'm more compassionate than you, Alex," she snarled when Alex leaned on the bar beside Mark.

"Oh, shut your pie hole, Yang," Alex answered.

"Hey Joe, can we have another round please?" George called from the end of the bar.

"Yeah, give Nurse O'Malley a drink on me," Alex told Joe.

George chuckled derisively. "What'd you say?" He turned back to the table of nurses he'd been sitting with. "Hey, uh, Karev just called me a nurse."

At the hostile looks and angry mutterings Mark pushed Meredith and Cristina farther down the bar and away from Alex.

"Is that the worst you could come up with?" George grinned. "Oh, wait, was that an insult or was that, uh, supposed to be funny?"

One of the nurses passed behind Cristina and dumped her drink in Cristina's lap. Cristina whirled around. "Are you kidding me?"

"And that is our cue to leave," Mark pulled Meredith from the bar stool. "Put their next round on my tab, Joe," he said motioning to the mob squaring off with Cristina.

Joe nodded and went to stand between the nurses and Cristina. Meredith grabbed Cristina's arm and dragged her away. George ran out after them calling his good-byes. "Sorry. They're my ride."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I can walk," Meredith giggled. "Seriously."

Mark looked down at her and grinned. "Sure you can, lightweight."

"I'm not drunk, Mark," Meredith protested and giggled again. "I'm fine. I didn't even have time to drink all that much. You pulled us out before I could damage my liver."

"Sure," he agreed again. "Get the door, George," he ordered.

George grinned and shook his head at them in fond affection. They were hilarious sometimes. "Right. Is that why you keep me around? To open doors for you?"

"Why would there be any other reason?" Mark asked in a serious tone as George unlocked the door and disappeared up the stairs to his room. Mark nuzzled a spot behind Meredith's ear and drew in a deep lungful of her lavender scent. "So drunken sex?"

Meredith giggled and turned her head to capture his lips. "I'm not drunk," she murmured when they came up for air. "Tipsy, yes. Drunk, nope. But you can make love with me anyway."

Mark pulled her bottom lip with his teeth and headed up the stairs. He wouldn't have minded just falling on the couch or pushing her up against the wall but they did have roommates. Behavior like that could wait until they had the house to themselves and besides there was a perfectly wonderful bed just up the stairs.

Meredith had been so lost in the pleasure of his lips on her and the freedom of running her hands through his hair and over his shoulders that she hadn't been aware of their journey. She let out a small yelp of surprise when Mark dropped her on the bed. It was quickly muffled by his lips again covering her own and his big body pushing her back on the bed.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith followed George to the nurse's desk the next morning writing down every word of the instructions the nurse's had sent with him. "And don't believe 2519 when she tells you she went to the bathroom because she just wants to go home. She just says she went to the bathroom and then she's back here two days later."

Meredith nodded. "Got it."

"Hey," Burke called out as he passed them. "I need sutures in 2602."

"Can't help you," George called back instantly. He realized what he said and stopped abruptly. Turning around he gazed at Burke with a half apologetic half mulish expression.

"What?" Burke asked sharply.

Behind George, leaning with one elbow against the desk, Mark smirked in amusement. George's stand for the nurses was courageous and cute. He really did like little George. He was a good guy.

George shifted a bit on his feet uncomfortably. "Fair hours! Fair wages!" he finally shouted and thrust his fist in the air. "Fair hours! Fair…" He stopped and sighed at Burke's shocked look. "It's no offense."

"None taken," Burke told him with a smirk of his own.

George turned around and shuffled dejectedly to the desk. Izzie held out a cup of coffee with a laugh. "Hey, how's the strike going?"

"Do you know—" George set the coffee on the desk beside a grinning Mark and Izzie. "Do you realize how rarely doctors say 'thank you' and 'please' to nurses? How few surgeons even know the names of…"

"Hey," Mark objected. "I always say 'please' and 'thank you'."

"Usually while fucking them in an on-call room," Meredith teased.

Mark rolled his eyes. "At least I remember their names the next morning," he teased back.

George chuckled and then looked around. "I shouldn't be seen talking to you guys."

Mark, Meredith and Izzie waved him off with grins.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith called time of death, calmly walked from the room and ran. Ran to the one place she knew, beyond a doubt that was safe. She ran to Mark.

Mark looked up as his office door banged open. She launched herself at him and he wrapped his arms around her. "I can't…breathe," she gasped out.

Mark rocked her slowly. "Sh, Angel, it's all right. Sh. I've got you."

She slowly settled down. "I'm…thanks, Mark." She drew in a shaky breath and pulled back. "I've got to go see the chief. He needs to keep visiting mom. She can't…I don't want her to die alone, Mark."

He pushed her hair behind her ears and held her face in his hands. "Okay."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

They never understood why they did this. Some nights the world seemed a bit too big to take on alone and so they went to him. They lay down and either talked or didn't. It never mattered either way.

They didn't know why he seemed to make the world a bit smaller. A bit more manageable. No other person could do this for them.

Izzie usually came first. She would lie on her back next to him, just breathing. Within minutes Meredith would show up and take his other side. Moments after Mark would lean one shoulder against the doorjamb and simply watch them. Standing sentinel. If they talked he might join in or he might not.

It was inexplicable. It was comforting. The companionship was something magical and not to be talked about. It was theirs. It was family.


	29. It's the End of the World

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy isn't mine. Sorry if you were hoping for something different this time.**

**A/N: Yes, I know. I'm a bad author. Has taken much to long for me to update. My internet was glitchy and then it got sort of fixed and I had to work and then go Christmas shopping for a whole day. An ENTIRE day. And it sucked. Cuz I hate shopping. Really hate shopping. But what can you do? So here you go. One chapter of each fic to make up for not posting.**

**It's the End of the World**

"I'm not going today," Meredith told Mark the moment her eyes had opened. "I'm not."

Mark stared down at her. "Why? Are you sick?"

"No." Meredith said in a short tone. "I'm just not going."

Mark knew that tone and that look. She wasn't going to be budged if she could help it. He nodded. "Okay. I'll tell Bailey you're not feeling well." He stroked a gentle hand over her hair and went to take a shower. Telling her she could stay home eased a tightness in his gut that he hadn't noticed until it was gone.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Maybe he should have told Izzie and George to leave her alone, he thought as he stepped out of the bathroom to see Cristina standing on their bed shouting at Meredith to get her ass up and get to work.

"Mark said I could stay home," Meredith whined.

"I don't care what McSteamy said," Cristina disagreed. "Move, move, move!" She nudged Meredith in the hip with her foot none too gently. "Work. Surgeries! Saving lives!"

Meredith slipped out of the bed with a glare at Cristina. She turned to Mark and kissed his cheek. "I'll see you there," she muttered. "And next time tell them all I have some infectious disease or something."

Mark nodded silently and pulled her to his chest. For some reason he felt dread pooling in his stomach. The insane thought that this would be the last time he ever held her passed through his mind. He pushed it away quickly. "I love you," he whispered.

"Love you too," she grunted back.

"Watch out for her," Mark instructed Cristina after Meredith had headed for the door. "Something's wrong."

Cristina rolled her eyes but nodded anyway.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You all right?" Derek asked her as she stared at the door to the E.R.

She turned her head to look at him. The world seemed to be underwater. She couldn't quite grasp onto anything. "I have a feeling," she told him slowly.

"Oh," he nodded and she knew he didn't get it. Mark had understood without her telling him even that much. "I get those," Derek continued.

Maybe he had understood. "Yeah?"

He nodded. "Yeah."

"And?" She asked.

"If you wait long enough, it passes." He didn't get it. She wasn't surprised. She left him standing there to go find out what she was supposed to be doing.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

The five of them had been directed to the E.R. until their newest resident showed up. This would be the third one in the two weeks since Bailey had been gone. They all missed her like they'd never thought they would. The other residents were sloppy, boring, and far too easy to get around. It was no fun doing things they weren't supposed to if their resident was too afraid to take them to task for it.

Once in the E.R. they were sent out to wait for an incoming ambulance. Izzie and Alex were squabbling while George and Cristina continued the discussion on who their new resident might be. Meredith trailed behind them trying to concentrate on the job and shake off the feeling that she was going to die today. It was far too persistent and left her feeling as though she was walking through fog.

"Can we get back to the point?" Cristina broke up Alex and Izzie's bickering.

"You had a point?" George asked jokingly.

"Yeah," Cristina said curtly. "Which surgeon are we gonna have to suck up to today?"

"That," came a familiar voice that had them all spinning to face it in shock. "Would be me."

"Dr. Bailey," Cristina breathed out in mixed pleasure and confusion.

Bailey ignored her and fixed them with her evil eye. "I've been gone two weeks—TWO weeks and you ran off two residents? I've got people phoning me at home, screamin', tellin' me my interns are Rosemary's babies. Nobody wants you. Do you think I have time for this?" She ranted loudly. "I am pregnant! I'm supposed to be on bed rest. I'm supposed to be growin' a human being!" She waved her hands at her distended stomach. "I'm supposed to be calm. Do I look calm to you? Did I raise you fools to be pariahs?"

George pushed past Izzie and Meredith with a strange look on his face. Silence fell over the group and George leaned over and drew Bailey into his arms. He laid his head on her shoulder like he was a little child. "You're back." He whispered in a broken voice.

She struggled futilely in his hold. "I'm not back," she protested but all of them could see the pleasure hiding behind the irritation in her eyes.

"You're not?" George muffled voice was confused.

Bailey hit his back, hard. "Get off me," she ordered.

George squeezed her one more time and then let go. He turned around and looked at the others with a bright, impish smile. The bleats of an ambulance caught all of their attention.

"Yang, Karev, Grey, stay here and wait for the incoming case." Bailey ordered. She felt a bit uncomfortable now. They were all staring at her like she was a rock star or had come back from the dead just for them or something. And they were all nodding at her like bobble head dolls. "O'Malley, page Addison Shepherd." He scurried off like he always did when she barked an order at him. "Stevens, get a wheelchair."

"A wheelchair?" Izzie asked confused.

"A wheelchair," Bailey enunciated. Izzie ran off to fetch it.

George came running back up behind her. "What should I tell Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd?" He asked quickly.

"What did I say?" She asked them when they only continued to nod zombie-like at her. She suppressed a smile when Cristina, Alex and Meredith hustled towards the ambulance.

"Dr. Bailey?" George asked.

Bailey turned around and glared at him. "What?"

George gulped. "What do you want me to tell Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd when she answers her page?"

Izzie wheeled the chair beside them as there was a splash on the ground and Bailey and George both looked down. "Tell her my contractions are ten minutes apart and my water just broke all over your shoes."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark watched the hustle and bustle of the E.R. closely. Meredith seemed to have shaken off the strange mood she had been in earlier with the arrival of the ambulance. Or at least that's what he thought until he caught a glimpse of her eyes as she ran past him to book an O.R. They were still a bit dazed and uncertain.

But she was doing her job and she was doing it just as well as she did every other day so he left her be. He would follow her as much as possible but he'd let her do her job. She needed to work. Maybe the feeling would go away.

The dread didn't leave the pit of his stomach no matter how much he tried to believe that she'd be fine.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"How are you doing over there?" Meredith asked the paramedic, Hannah, as one of the nurses helped her into a pair of gloves.

"My hand's getting numb," Hannah shifted restlessly. "And I gotta tell you, this whole insides are 'bloody and squishy' thing is so not good for my gag reflex." She paused and took a deep breath. "But I'm good. Is this okay? Me being in here like this?"

Meredith stood next to her for a moment trying to look as comforting as possible with only her eyes visible behind her mask. "Once Dr. Burke scrubs in, he'll have you remove your hand," Meredith explained gently. "And then you can go and we'll fix Mr. Carlson."

"Good," Hannah sighed in relief. "Cause I know how much medicine I know and it's just enough to never be allowed in an O.R. It's my second week as a paramedic. I got out of school about a month ago."

Meredith knew that the girl was chattering because she was frightened. "I haven't been doing this that long either," she tried to reassure her.

"Talk about on the job training, hunh?" Hannah chuckled.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark stood at the gallery window watching her again. Something was off about this surgery. About the patient. He couldn't quite put his finger on it though. He really didn't have a good feeling about this day. He'd tried to ignore it. But the dread wouldn't leave him.

He could tell that Meredith was chattering with the paramedic. So Angel was okay but still there was something off. Something wrong. He just wished he knew what it was so that he could fix it before Angel got hurt or worse.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

He continued to stand at the gallery window. He knew that there was work he should be doing but he couldn't bring himself to leave this small room.

Burke was there now. The paramedic would soon be able to take her hand from the man's chest cavity. Somehow Mark thought he'd feel a lot better when they were finished with this one surgery.

Burke placed himself between Meredith and paramedic and held his hand out for the scalpel. Mark, suddenly cold, sat in one of the chairs and wrapped his arms around his chest. Burke put the scalpel to the man's flesh and stopped. He turned his head to the door. Mark frowned and got up, pressing against the window to try and see what was happening.

Burke handed off the scalpel, had one of the nurses unhook his lights and stepped away from the table. Mark growled. He couldn't see who was at the door. He hated not knowing what was happening below.

Everyone was watching the door. The paramedic straightened and looked to be talking to either Burke or whomever had interrupted. The anesthesiologist eyes widened and he craned his neck up before slumping back. Meredith left the girl's side and disappeared to the door.

Mark set off at a run from the gallery. He had to see her. He had to know what the Hell was going on.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Meredith!" He yelled out when he saw her hurrying away from the nurse's desk. "Mer! Angel! Wait up."

Meredith whirled around to face him. "Mark," she said in relief. "I was going to come looking for you after I tell Burke what the…" she stopped and looked around carefully. There was no one close enough to overhear if she spoke quietly. Unwilling to take any chances she pulled his head down so that his ear was at her mouth. "There's a bomb in Mr. Carlson." She whispered so quietly that he barely heard her.

Mark whipped his head up and stared down at her. "What did you just say?" He asked harshly.

She stubbornly wouldn't repeat it until he leaned down and stared straight into her eyes. "A bomb, Mark."

"You're joking," he breathed out. She shook her head. "Okay. Go. Go outside and I'll come find you. Now," he ordered.

Tears lined her eyes. "I can't. I have to go tell Burke something. I have to."

Mark put a hand on either side of her face and nodded. He could see the stubbornness and the need to do the task she'd been given in her green eyes. "Okay, Angel. Okay. Go. Tell him. Do what you need to do and then come to me. Got it? In the lobby, at the desk. Come to me."

She nodded, her eyes wide but not scared. "Got it."

Unable to help himself he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. In response she parted her own and swept her tongue over the seam of his lips. For a few precious moments their tongues tangled and danced and then he set her away from him. "Go, Angel. Hurry."

With a last sweet kiss to his cheek and a softly murmured 'I love you' she fled down the hallway and back towards the O.R. and the bomb resting inside a man's chest.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

She stood in the crowd outside the O.R. waiting. Alex was fuming. So mad at Hannah for putting her hand inside a man's chest, but Meredith thought she could understand. Hannah was a paramedic. She had signed her life over to saving other people. Nothing mattered more in that one moment than keeping the person before them alive. Meredith knew that even Alex would have done the same. She knew she wouldn't have hesitated.

The O.R. door finally opened and Burke exited. "What do we do now?" Meredith shot out before the door had even closed behind him.

Burked frowned at her but he wasn't angry only worried and a bit afraid. "I go back in and wait for the bomb squad." He glanced in the O.R. for a second to check on Hannah. "You leave. You all leave." He ordered.

The gathered doctors and nurses started to slowly walk away. Meredith felt frozen in place. She knew she should go. Should walk away with the others and leave Dr. Burke, Hannah, Dr. Milton and Mr. Carlson to their fates. But she couldn't get her feet to move. Burke would need help when they removed the bomb to keep Mr. Carlson alive. He couldn't operate by himself. And he was Cristina's boyfriend. Meredith had to help him.

"Mer, you comin'?" Alex asked her after a few seconds of her simply staring at Burke. She turned now to stare at him and his heart broke at the look in her eyes. "Mer?" There was a slight shake of her head. "You want-?" Now her head shook violently. She was not going to let him stay.

"Find the others," she said in a steady voice. "And tell them…tell them I have to help. I have to. And that I love them, just in case."

Alex scowled. "There better not be any just in case, Mer. Seriously." He glared hard at her and then turned and strode off down the hall to the elevator.

Meredith sighed and turned back to Burke. She crossed her arms over her chest and stared at him soberly. "You need a surgical team," she said calmly. Some of the rest of the team stood behind her, waiting for her to convince Burke for them. They weren't leaving any of them alone to possibly die.

"All I need is Dr. Milton to keep him under," Burke disagreed already knowing that protesting was useless with this woman. At least today it was. He saw the look in her eyes. Knew that she was determined to save the patient and keep the rest of them as safe as she could. Still he had to try. "I can do the rest myself."

Meredith sighed and uncrossed her arms. She didn't say anything she simply stared at him. Burke shivered, she wasn't going to budge.

"Fine." He finally gave in. "But you wait by the elevator. I don't want anyone in here that doesn't need to be in this O.R. When the bomb squad arrives we'll take it from there. Until then, Milton and I are doing this alone. Now, go." Meredith and the others started off down the hallway to the elevators. "Grey," Burke called out and she turned back to him. "You know he's going to kill you for this, don't you?"

Meredith gave a sad smile. "Yeah. But he'll understand in the end."

Burke gave her a nod and she went back to the elevator.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark ignored the pager beeping on his waist as he stood in the lobby of the surgical wing waiting for Meredith. He knew it was the order to evacuate. He couldn't yet though. He had to wait for Meredith.

He watched the people scurrying around him. He saw the police and the bomb squad arrive with a sigh of relief. Angel should be here any moment.

"Mark," he heard a quiet voice say from beside him. He'd been so busy searching for Meredith that he hadn't noticed Alex come up to him. "I…" Alex winced and looked like he was trying to form words that didn't want to be said.

"She stayed," Mark breathed out. "She stayed up there to help with the patient." He didn't need to see Alex's nod to know it was the truth. "I'm going to fucking strangle her," Mark whispered and rubbed at his forehead with one hand. "Seriously this time."

Alex gave him a halfhearted smirk. "This time?" He asked.

Mark let out a chuckle. "Someday remind me to tell you all about the adventures of Death and Die, yeah?" Alex nodded. "They still on the O.R. floor?" Alex nodded again. "Then I'll see you later, Alex. I have a girlfriend to go yell at."

Alex sighed as Mark entered the elevator and then headed off to find the rest of their friends.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith looked up quickly when the elevator dinged. The bomb squad was a welcome sight but not the one she really wanted.

"Are you the surgical team," the dark haired man that seemed to be leading asked without pause.

"Yes," Meredith answered just as quickly.

"Dylan Young, bomb squad," he introduced himself. He didn't give her a chance to do the same but turned to his team and began barking out orders. "Spread out, check the area, and then we'll secure the patient." He turned back to Meredith. "Where are they?"

"Dr. Burke has them in there," she motioned down the hall.

"And the rest of this floor has been evacuated?"

Meredith nodded. "It has, yes."

Dylan caught her eyes with his own. "All right," he nodded once, firmly. "You stay here. Nobody moves unless I say so." He took one last look into her eyes to try and convey comfort and warning and then made his way down the hall.

Suddenly one of the other members of the bomb squad called out. "We've got people over here!"

Dylan turned back around with a furious frown in Meredith's direction. "I thought you said the floor had been evacuated," he accused.

"I thought it had," Meredith protested. "That's what I was told."

They heard the arguing voices before they saw the people doing the arguing. "This is a sterile area. You can't come in!" Cristina's angry voice filled the hallway.

"Cristina!" Meredith called out shocked and suddenly afraid.

"Seriously! Back up!" Cristina yelled at the bomb squad guy.

The guy started to grab Cristina to move her out of the way. "Oh no no!" Meredith yelled. "Sh-she will hurt him." He backed off.

Cristina stayed in front of the door and stared at Meredith confused. "What's going on?" She demanded.

"Bomb in a body cavity," Meredith told her instantly but quietly and seriously.

Cristina blinked and looked at the bomb squad guys for an instant before moving to stand by Meredith. "Man," there was disappointment in her voice. "All I got is Bailey's husband's open brain."

"What procedure?" Meredith asked.

"Craniotomy with Shepherd." Cristina answered.

Meredith had an instant of hilarity inside her own head. The light in Cristina's eyes said she'd had the same. They were standing on a floor with a bomb that could go off at any time and they were jealous of each other's surgeries. Well, they decided as though they shared one brain between them, they were surgical interns. And surgery junkies. Hooked on the scalpel. And this surreal moment just proved it.

"Wait." The rest of Cristina's statement finally penetrated. "Shepherd's got Bailey's husband on the table?"

"Excuse me," Dylan tried to interrupt them.

"Bailey's having a baby, right now!" Meredith said quickly not even hearing Dylan.

Cristina was asking about the bomb while Meredith was talking. A loud "EXCUSE ME!" stopped them both midsentence. "Stop talking," Dylan ordered them.

Meredith and Cristina shared a put out look. "Jeez," they both mouthed and then turned back to Dylan.

He shooed them both away and Meredith went back to stand by the elevator again while Cristina went back into her O.R.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Meredith," he called to her before the doors to the elevator were open enough for him to even attempt to exit. They finally finished opening and she was falling into him. He held her to his chest and stepped to the side of the elevator. "You are in so much trouble, Angel," he informed her.

She nodded against his chest and let a small smile flit around her lips. "Yeah, I figured." She admitted.

He didn't yell at her like he'd planned to do. He just held her. He knew damn well why she'd stayed. "You and your damned saving people thing," he whispered.

She let out a quiet giggle. "You and your damned Harry Potter obsession."

"You tell anyone and I will kill you. They'll never find the body." He chuckled back.

"Promise." She drew in a deep breath of his scent and pulled her head up. "You should go," she told him. "You don't have to be here."

He glared down at her upturned face. "Shut up, Angel." She smiled, shrugged and buried herself back in his chest. He finally looked up from her to take in the activity around them and spotted a familiar figure down the hall. "Cris!" He yelled. "Get over here, now!"

Cristina's eyes widened when she spotted him and she hurried over. "Does Mer—never mind," Meredith obviously knew exactly where her boyfriend was.

Mark unwrapped one arm from around Meredith and held it open for Cristina. "Come here," he said evenly.

Cristina looked slightly longingly at the offered comfort and then shook her head. "I don't hug, Sloan."

"And I don't care," he nearly snarled. "Get over here now!"

Cristina started and then scurried to his side to bury herself next to Meredith in his strong arms. "But I'm only doing this because you're my boss," she told him huffily.

"Okay."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

None of them were sure how long they stood like that. Time didn't seem to matter very much anymore. Mark nodded to Burke when he saw him down the hall and Burke had nodded back with a small smile. It wasn't long before the other man came to them.

"We need to check the films and plan out how we're going to do this," he told Mark quietly. "Would you like to assist or will you stay here and keep an eye on our girls?" He didn't really want to pull Mark from Meredith and Cristina but an extra pair of eyes was always helpful.

"He'll go with you," they said at the same time, peeling themselves from Mark's chest and pushing out of his arms.

"You'll need all the help you can get," Cristina said.

"And Mark has a good eye for details," Meredith chimed in.

"The bosses have spoken, Preston," Mark grinned. "Looks like we get to have a boy's night."

Burke let a small smile loose and the two men walked away down the hall to look at the films.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith and Cristina leaned against the window watching Mark and Burke discuss plans with Dylan. "So how are they gonna remove that ammo without killing Hannah and James?" Meredith wondered aloud. A movement down the hall pulled Cristina from her side and Meredith turned her head to look. "Cristina? The bomb squad guy said you're supposed to stay away from there."

Cristina ignored her and moved closer to the O.R. door. "Is it me or is Hannah shaking?" She craned her head to see better in through the window.

Meredith joined her. "Is she squeezing that Ambu bag by herself?"

"Where is Dr. Milton?" Cristina asked angrily.

Meredith reached forward and slowly opened the door. "Hannah," she said quietly but firmly. The dark haired girl looked over with wide, frightened brown eyes. "Where's the anesthesiologist?"

"He, um…" the girl told them slowly and then let out a sigh. "He left. He didn't want to die." Her eyes closed and her face crumbled.

"Hannah," Meredith said again.

The girl didn't seem to hear her. She drew in a shuddering breath and tilted her chin up. "I think I'm gonna take my hand out now." She looked over to the door and nodded shakily.

"Hannah," Meredith said yet again. "Get Mark," she hissed to Cristina as Hannah let go of the ambu bag.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark crossed his arms over his chest as they continued to make plans. The bomb squad guy was irritating him. Dylan Young was abrasive and pessimistic. He was only seeing the worst outcome and Mark had no desire to think about things that way. Everything would work out. It had to.

"Hey, somebody!" Cristina's voice, though muffled by space and doors seemed overly loud and terrified. "Help! We need help in here!"

Mark and Burke bolted from the room before the bomb squad guys had a chance to process the call for help. They burst through the O.R. doors and stopped abruptly, Dylan nearly crashing into their backs.

The scene before them could have been something out of Mark's nightmares and he knew it would feature in them for a long time to come. Cristina was gently pumping the ambu bag with wide, dark eyes that saw nothing. Meredith was standing next to the shaking paramedic with one arm around the girl's shoulders and the other hand holding the girl's arm steady inside the patient's chest.

"I think I'm just gonna take it out now, okay?" Hannah panted out. Tears streamed down her face.

"You made it almost to the finish line." Meredith was trying to calm her down. "You can do this," she encouraged.

Hannah shook her head wildly. "No, nono, I just wanna take it out and be done with it."

"Hannah," Burke said in a calm voice, though his eyes too were wide and wild. "It won't be much longer. Remember, you're keeping him from bleeding out."

"Just a few more minutes, Hannah," Mark tried when her head continued to shake. "You're almost there. You can do this. You need to keep Mr. Carlson alive, remember?"

"No!" Hannah moaned. "I am 22 years old. I should not even be in here. This is some kind of mistake." She cried out hysterically.

"She's panicking," Dylan said lowly. "We need to clear the room."

Meredith tightened her arm around the shaking girl and held her hand a bit more firmly. "I'm not leaving," she disagreed with an apologetic look at Mark.

"Grey, let's move," Burke ordered in a firm tone.

"Angel," Mark said in a quiet, intense voice. "Please."

"I'm not leaving her," she insisted. "She can do this. She'll be fine."

"You two need to get everyone out now," Dylan told them.

"She's my intern. I'm responsible for her." Burke argued.

"She won't leave," Mark said in a broken voice. "She can't. It's not in her to walk away from someone in need."

"No," Hannah sobbed. "It's gotta come out. It has to come out."

"We can do this," Meredith ignored everyone to focus on Hannah.

"Yang, go with Dylan," Burke ordered.

"You go with Dylan," Cristina shot back.

Mark watched them all and felt the dread that had been building all day come to the breaking point. He knew what was going to happen. Could see it with crystal clarity. "Angel," he whispered, knowing she wouldn't hear him. "Oh God."

They kept calling out reassurances to Hannah. She kept crying and insisting that her hand had to come out. Through it all Mark kept his eyes on Meredith. She looked up and there was a knowledge in her eyes that he answered with his own. An acceptance. A promise.

Hannah's hand slipped from Meredith's grasp and she pulled it out and ran for the door. Cristina, Burke and Dylan hit the floor. Meredith's eyes never left Mark's. He cracked from his frozen posture and ran to her. "Angel," he breathed.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Cristina hit the floor with a thud and covered her head with her arms. She knew it wouldn't do much good but she couldn't help it. She knew she should have left the floor long ago. When Shepherd had told them all they could go because of the drill that wasn't one. But she couldn't.

At first it had been that she wasn't going to miss a good surgery for some stupid drill. Then, when she found out Meredith was still there, it had been physically impossible for her to leave. Meredith was her person. She had to stay. She had to be there for whatever happened. Because Meredith was her person.

She was irritated with Burke for trying to order her out. For not understanding that Meredith was her person in a way that no one else would ever be. She wondered briefly while she waited for the explosion if she would have left if Mark had asked her too. Possibly. Mark was Meredith's everything. And she was his. She fought back a touch of jealousy every time she saw them together but not much.

They included her. They wanted her. And it wasn't in a 'oh, you're my girl's best friend so you can come along too', it was an actual 'you're a cool person, can I be your friend too?' way.

Realizing that she had allowed herself to engage in a Meredith type ramble and that the explosion hadn't happened she slowly brought her arms away from her head and turned her eyes upwards. She had the sudden feeling that she knew exactly what she would find. Stupid, idiotic, foolish Meredith. She shook Burke's shoulder and stared up at her friend. "Meredith," she breathed. "Why?"

But Meredith only shook her head and leaned back into Mark's chest without moving her hand from Mr. Carlson's chest. "What did I do?" She whispered almost soundlessly.

Mark leaned his head down to her ear. "What you had to, Angel," he said just as quietly.


	30. As We Know It

**Disclaimer: Still not mine.**

**As We Know It**

Mark moved out of the way just enough for Dylan to strap the flak jacket to his Angel. He wasn't going to leave her side. If that bomb went off then he'd be there with her. He wouldn't live without her. He took the jacket one of the bomb squad guys handed him and quickly put it on.

"You realize how stupid that was?" Dylan asked Meredith lowly. Mark sent him a furious glare that the other man didn't see.

"It was, Mer, incredibly stupid," Cristina seconded and his glare transferred to her. "What?" She asked in her normal Cristina tone. "It was."

"Okay," Meredith bit out at Cristina and ignored Dylan. "You know when you don't need to be made fun of? Like, when you've got your hand inside a body that's got a bomb in it and a stranger is velcroing a flak jacket to your boobs."

"Okay, okay," Cristina muttered at her resentfully.

"You've got a sense of irony," Dylan observed.

"Only when things are really ironic," Meredith shot back. "Next time I have a feeling let me stay in bed, Cristina. Mark said I could stay in bed and you made me get out and come to work. You're the suckiest best friend."

"Next time you have a feeling, Mer," Cristina said seriously. "Me and Mark are climbing in right next to you."

"What's that?" Dylan asked.

Meredith shared a long look with Cristina and shook her head. "Nothing." Dylan finished with the straps and stepped back.

Mark immediately stood behind Meredith and wrapped himself around her. "Next time, we're bringing the whole damned family into the bed with us." He swore.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Burke strode through the doors a few minutes later and headed straight for Cristina. "Time for you two," he motioned to Mark to include him. "To go."

Mark only snorted derisively and leaned his head on the top of Meredith's. "No," Cristina objected. "I'm staying."

Burke ignored Mark and tried to take the ambu bag from Cristina. "There's nothing more you can do here," he told her gently. "We've got it covered." Cristina held the bag with a lost look in her eyes. She couldn't leave. "Cristina," Burke's voice became a bit firmer. "This is not another cool surgery. That ammo could go off at any time and kill everyone in this room."

Cristina glared up at him. "I know that," she snarled. "Do you really believe that's why I'm staying? Do you know me at all?"

"You cannot be in here," Burke continued with an intense look in his eyes.

"Seriously," Cristina hissed.

"I cannot do this with you in here," Burke told her. "I cannot think."

Cristina stopped and stared at him for a moment before turning to Meredith. Meredith was her person and if she wanted her, needed her to be here then Burke could go to Hell. Their eyes met and held for endless eons. "We'll be fine," Meredith finally told her though her eyes looked broken. "Go. Tell the others…well, just go. Please."

Cristina knew that Meredith wanted her to live if the worst happened. She really didn't want to go but now she had too. She let Burke take the bag and stepped away from the table with a heartbroken look. She stood at Burke's elbow. "You know in the movies how there's always the hero and then there's the other guy, the guy who sees danger and then runs in the opposite direction?"

"Yes," Burke answered quietly.

"Be the other guy," Cristina begged and then she turned and walked out the door. She knew Meredith didn't need her to say anything else. Meredith knew the words burning in her heart.

Meredith exhaled a loud breath. Mark held on just a bit tighter as he felt her tense. "Don't even think about it. I'm sticking, Angel. To the end."

She nodded and locked eyes with Dylan. "So you have a plan, right?" She asked calmly. Tears sprang to her eyes at his impassive expression. "You have a way to get us out of this, right?"

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Is this the strangest thing that's ever happened in your O.R.?" Meredith asked Burke suddenly.

"I'd have to say that it is," he answered.

"Not mine," Mark chuffed out a laugh. It sounded forced even to his own ears.

"No kidding," Meredith answered in a smart ass voice. "You're in there. There's nothing stranger than that." She turned her eyes back to Burke's. "Good. I'm glad this is the strangest thing because I'm very competitive."

"All the best surgeons are," Burke told her evenly.

Mark snickered against Meredith's head. "Where's the March Hare, Hatter?"

Meredith, Burke and Dylan couldn't suppress their own snickers.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark laid his cheek against the top of Meredith's head and felt her breathing. He didn't think he'd ever been this scared in his life but her steady, even breaths calmed him and made some of the fear recede. They would get through this. They had to.

Meredith could feel Mark's body trembling slightly against her back but she didn't say anything about it. She knew he was scared. She wasn't. He was here. Mark was here and nothing bad had ever happened to her with Mark around. They would get through this. She focused on keeping her breath calm in an attempt to keep him calm. She watched Burke and Dylan whispering to each other by the door and knew they were freaking Mark out even more.

"Stop it," she ordered them harshly. They both stared at her. "I'm not a patient."

"What?" Dylan asked her confused.

"The two of you are looking at me the way we look at patients, like I'm gonna freak out at any minute. I'm not gonna freak out."

"I am," Mark muttered too quietly for the other men to hear him.

Meredith rolled her eyes and settled back into him. "Whatever it is, just tell us straight out."

Burke looked at her levelly and nodded sharply. He crossed his arms over his chest. "The main oxygen line runs directly under this room," he said quickly and without emotion.

"Okay," she nodded. She tilted her head at his serious look and Mark's arms tightened to a point where they were nearly crushing her ribs. "Not okay?" She squeaked out and thumped Mark's chest with her head in an effort to make him let go. He loosened the arms fractionally. "Well?" She pressed when they all stayed silent. "I need one of you to tell me what this means, exactly. Because I think I know what it means, but I really hope I'm wrong. Really, seriously hope it doesn't mean what I think it means."

"It does mean that, Angel," Mark told her bluntly.

"So it means that if this bomb explodes over the main oxygen line, the whole hospital could blow up." Meredith finally felt the fear return. The whole hospital. Crap!

"Meredith," Dylan stepped forward, relieved to finally see a normal reaction from the strange woman. She had been cuddled up with her boyfriend all afternoon, calm and quiet and not even looking to be afraid. He'd worried that she was in some kind of shock or that he was dealing with a sociopath that could get bored and pull her hand out for the fun of it. Now he understood that she was simply very strong willed. "All it means is that we have to move." He told her simply.

Mark shuddered once and was still. Burke turned to Dylan with a disbelieving look. "Move?"

"That's right," Dylan said not taking his eyes from Meredith's. "We have to move. And now," he turned his back on the couple at the operating table. "Because I don't want to spend another second in this room."

"Wait," Meredith said. "I can't wriggle my fingers because we can't shift the ammo. And now you want to roll out the entire gurney?"

"We can do it, Angel," Mark said firmly. He knew somewhere inside he was still wishing he was curled up in their bed. He knew he should still be freaking out. But he wasn't. There was work to be done now and he was calm. "How do you want to do this?" He asked Dylan.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Movement in the hallway caught Cristina's eye again. She abandoned Dr. Shepherd and peeked out the window. Her eyes widened. What the Hell were they doing?

"What is so interesting out there, Dr. Yang?" Shepherd asked her.

"I…um," she didn't finish, just ripped off her gown and headed out the door.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"You're doing great," Dylan told her from his place on her right side. Mark was on her left and they both held onto her to keep her steady.

"Let's go over it again," Meredith requested in a quiet voice.

"The device is shaped like a rocket," Dylan obliged her, even though they'd had this conversation at least twenty-five times. He had quickly figured out that it kept her from panicking. "It's about eight inches long, and we're gonna have everything ready. Dr. Burke's team is gonna be in place and my team is gonna be in place. Then I'm gonna ask you to take the hand that you have in Mr. Carlson and wrap it around the device."

Meredith nodded. "And pull it out."

"Level," Dylan and Mark reminded her.

"Pull it out while keeping it level." Dylan finished.

Meredith chanced a glance at Dylan. "You know I don't think I like you very much. You're kinda mean."

Dylan smirked. "I don't like you either. You're kinda stupid."

Meredith and Mark both snickered a bit.

Cristina's form barreled around a corner. "What are you doing?" She asked them loudly.

"Stop." Dylan commanded. "Stop right where you are."

"What are you doing?" Cristina asked again in an urgent tone.

"I thought Dr. Burke told you to leave," Dylan reprimanded her.

Meredith knew Cristina wouldn't leave until she got some answers. "We're moving to an O.R. further away from the oxygen line." Meredith said calmly. She tilted her head in what would normally be an impish action but was somehow gruesome now. "You know, in case we blow up."

"I distinctly remember him telling you to leave," Dylan ignored Meredith and focused on Cristina.

Cristina ignored him. "Where is he?" She asked Mark and Meredith.

"Prepping the O.R.," they told her together.

Now Cristina looked at Dylan. "Then he'll never know, will he?"

Meredith and Mark snickered again. Cristina was determined to be here. Here with her person. Dylan sighed. These doctors were some of the most stubborn people he'd ever had the misfortune to meet. But he couldn't help but admire their loyalty to each other. "You stay over there," he pointed with his eyes. Cristina slowly moved out of the way. "You _stay_ over there," he reiterated. Cristina nodded. "You ready?" He asked Meredith softly. She nodded and gripped Mark's hand in her own again. "Nice," he complimented as the gurney began to smoothly move along the floor again.

"Tell me something," Meredith ordered Cristina.

Cristina opened her mouth and then closed it and then opened it again. "What?"

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Cristina…I have my hand on a bomb. I'm freaking out. Mark's freaking out. But most importantly, I really have to pee." Dylan and Mark both let loose chuckles at that. "Tell me anything."

Cristina's mind lit on the one thing she'd wanted to tell Meredith all day but hadn't found the courage to do. "He told me he loved me," she confided. "Last night—he thought I was sleeping, but I heard him say it."

Meredith gave her a bright smile. "Burke loves you," she repeated happily.

"Yeah," Cristina said on a sigh. Dylan rolled his eyes at the girls. "Mind your own business," Cristina snapped.

"She's always that cranky," Mark told Dylan over Meredith's head. "And they're always like this. They're not crazy. Just a bit…different."

"Dark and Twisty, McSteamy. Get it right," Cristina rolled her eyes at him.

"Burke loves you," Meredith repeated.

Cristina shook her head in exasperation. "Yeah, everybody has problems."

Meredith grinned. "Well, are you gonna say it back or…?"

"Of course not," Cristina scoffed. "He didn't say it to me. He said it to sleeping me. Reciprocity is not required."

"Cris," Mark started.

"You don't get a vote, Sloan," Cristina snapped. "You give horrible relationship advice, remember? Besides, he might blow up."

Meredith giggled. "Excellent point."

The gurney slammed into a strip on the floor and everyone held their breaths. Silence. They all let out sighs of relief. "All right everybody," Dylan said. "Let's just keep placing one foot in front of the other." Mark and Meredith nodded like bobble head dolls. "Nice and slow. All right, Meredith, we're almost there."

Meredith nodded with her eyes closed. "Okay." Mark squeezed her hand.

"We're almost there." Dylan repeated. "Nice and easy. You ready?"

"Yep," Meredith said with that eerie calm.

"Yes," Mark echoed.

"All right, let's go," Dylan commanded. "All right, nice and slow." The gurney bumped over the strip.

Cristina flinched and locked her eyes on Meredith. "You had to say you were gonna die today."

Meredith gave her a wry look. "I told you," she pointed out. "And you made me get up anyway."

"I won't next time, I promise," Cristina said seriously.

"Good."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Burke stood beside her again. "We're ready when you are," he told Dylan. He eyed Mark as the man stayed wrapped around Meredith. "Right?"

Mark nodded sharply and braced his feet against the floor and tightened his arms around Meredith's waist. He didn't give a flying fuck what Dylan said. If that bomb looked like it was about to blow he'd pull Meredith as far away from it as he could. He was aware that it was an irrational thought but he couldn't stop it.

"We're good," Dylan said and refrained from rolling his eyes at them. "Meredith?" He asked.

"Yeah," she answered in a shaky voice.

"I'm going to extend the wound," Burke said in his teaching voice. Mark would have snorted if he wasn't concentrating on keeping Meredith as calm as possible. She was the only one here who would have been interested in his teaching and she was a bit busy not panicking now that the end was in sight. "When I cut, the bleeding is going to intensify. Grey," that got her attention and she glanced at him. "If we're going to save Mr. Carlson, you have to pull the ammo out immediately."

"But remember," Dylan interrupted. "Remove it while keeping it as level as possible. Nice and easy. No quick—"

"Seriously," Mark said suddenly in a louder voice than he'd intended. "That's enough. All of you. She knows the drill. Can we please just get on with it?" He bent his head and brought his mouth close to her ear. "Let's do this thing," he whispered to her.

Meredith let out a giggle that had Burke and Dylan's eyes widening in surprise. "I don't think this is quite the same as going skydiving, Marky," she giggled again. "Okay," she nodded and her eyes were determined. Her shaking had ceased and her hand seemed completely steady. "Let's get this over with."

Burke asked for the scalpel and started to cut.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Cristina went back to Shepherd's O.R. in a daze. Meredith could die at any second and the last thing they'd talked about had been her commitment issues with Burke. That was stupid. Seriously.

She'd wanted to tell Meredith how much she meant to her. But the words wouldn't come. She'd had so much to tell her person and the only thing that had come out of her mouth had been 'Burke said he loves me'. She was a horrible best friend.

"How's it going out there, Yang?" Shepherd asked as soon as he noticed her.

She tried to pull her thoughts together but they wouldn't quite gather into anything coherent. Her boyfriend and two of her best friends were about to pull a bomb out of a man and hopefully not blow them all up in the process. "Everything's…everything's fine," she finally said.

"How's the girl with the bomb?" He asked in a distracted tone.

She ignored the beginning of the wave of terror threatening her and stared at Bailey's husband. "How's he doing?" She asked.

"He's almost there. I need suction. Irrigate," he instructed one of his assistants. "You didn't answer my question, Yang," he observed.

Cristina struggled with her racing thoughts. "Sir?" She asked.

"How is the girl with the bomb?" He asked impatiently.

The wave of terror finally crashed over her. "It's Meredith," she said quietly biting back her instinctive shudders. "The g-girl with the bomb…it's Mer. Oh my God." She drew in a shaky breath and turned and ran from the room.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I'm good," Burke told Dylan. "She can go."

"All right. Now, Meredith," Dylan nodded.

"Shut up," Mark told him harshly. He put his mouth by her ear again. "Our turn, Angel. Nice and easy." Meredith nodded and slowly started to pull her hand and the bomb out.

The bomb slowly appeared and Mark closed his eyes. He didn't want to watch.

Meredith eyes concentrated on her hand and the bomb in it. She ignored everything around her except that bomb and the arms anchoring her. She could do this. She had done this. She handed the bomb gently to Dylan and sagged against Mark's chest.

"You did good," Dylan whispered.

Meredith nodded. "Thanks. And I don't hate you. I might even like you. Just not today."

Dylan gave her a cocky half-smirk. "Yeah." He slowly turned away and Mark pulled Meredith away from the table so that Burke could go to work.

"You got this?" Mark asked him.

"Yep," Burke nodded. "Go."

Mark pulled Meredith to the back of the room instead of out the doors so that he could help her out of her flak jacket and gown before they went to the locker room to let the others know they were fine. "I'm proud of you, Angel," Mark whispered as he pulled the straps from her small form.

"Yeah?" She asked in a dazed tone. The adrenaline was fading now and the stress had exhausted her. "Seriously?"

Mark pulled his mask off and grinned at her. "Yep. You were amazing. Except for the whole not leaving thing. That…that was not the best plan, Angel."

She cocked her head to the side. "Would you have stayed?" She asked him. "If Burke were Cristina and you were me, would you have stayed?"

Mark swallowed hard. "Yes," he admitted. She nodded. "Let's go home, Angel."

"Okay."

The room rattled with the force of the explosion.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Derek scanned the gathered crowd looking for one face. He needed to make sure she was okay. She had to be okay.

Richard approached him from behind. "Derek."

"Where is she?" Derek asked in a frantic tone.

"You had to be a cowboy," Richard said in disapproval.

"Wh-where is she?" He asked again as he spun in slow circles searching for her.

"She's right over here," Richard nodded with his head.

"Derek," Addison barreled into him. "Oh you're okay," she burrowed her head on his shoulder and let the tears fall. "You're okay."

Over Addison's shoulder he saw Adele lean over and whisper something to Richard quietly. Richard snorted and glared at him. "Well, _she_ has gone home with her boyfriend. All of her friends have already been informed." Adele rolled her eyes at him but nodded.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark had hustled Meredith from the hospital with single minded determination. He had only paused long enough to tell Alex to inform the chief that he'd taken Meredith home. Alex had tried to tell him something but Mark had brushed him off and nearly carried Meredith's silent form from the hospital.

She was completely silent all the way home. Only the steady rise and fall of her chest and the occasional blink let him know that she was still alive. This silent reaction scared him more than even the bomb had.

He pulled her limp, unresponsive body from the car and carried her up the stairs to the front door. With his lips pressed to her head and feverish whispers of her name he unlocked the front door and finally made it inside. He stopped and leaned his back against the door. "Mer? Angel?"

She didn't answer, simply lay limply in his arms and blinked. And then blinked again. "They're gone…" she whispered. "I don't even know their names…except Dylan…and they're gone."

Mark pressed her closer to his chest and gasped in air finally. After hours of feeling as though he'd been hold it he drew in deep breaths and smelled the precious scent of his Angel. "Yeah," he murmured into her hair. "Yeah they are. I'm so sorry, Angel."

"Why?"

"Why did they die?" He drew in one last breath and then pushed himself away from the door and towards the stairs. He had to get her upstairs and assure himself that she really was unhurt. "I…I don't know, Angel."

"No," her voice was still quiet but it seemed to have a bit more of her normal tone to it. "Why are you sorry?"

Mark stopped in the doorway to their bedroom and shook his head while holding her a little tighter. "Because I'm not. I'm not sorry that it was them. I should be. I'm a doctor. I should always be sorry that someone died. But…I don't care. I'm just glad it wasn't you."

Her arms came up and wound around his neck. "Oh."

"I'm a very selfish man, Angel. I would trade everyone on the planet for you so I'm sorry that I'm not sorry." He carried her over to their bed after kicking the door shut behind them and tried to set her on top of the covers but she wouldn't let him go.

"Me too," she whispered in his ear. "Thank you."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Izzie knocked on the door to Meredith and Mark's bedroom. She opened the door without waiting for an answer, fairly sure they weren't up to any shenanigans. They weren't. They lay on the bed entwined together watching the rain fall down the window pane. "There's someone at the door for you, Mer." She told them.

Mark groaned, already knowing who it was. Meredith rolled her eyes but slipped from the bed and followed Izzie out of the room. "Wait for me," Mark called after them and hopped out of the bed.

He grasped Meredith's hand in his own and let her lead him down the stairs. At the bottom he stopped and leaned against the wall, silent, watching. The sentinel again.

"Hey," Meredith greeted Derek.

"Hey," Derek whispered back. "You almost died today," he said in a more normal voice.

"Yeah," she agreed in a wry tone. "We almost died today."

"We?" He asked, confused.

"Me, Mark, Cris, Burke, you…everyone else in the hospital," she elaborated. She rolled her eyes. "Guess it's a good thing I took over for Hannah when she panicked or we'd all be gone now."

"A good thing?" Derek stuttered. "A good thing?! Have you lost your mind?" He was suddenly shouting. "Do you have a death wish, Meri? Why in God's name would you have even stayed? From what I've heard you had the same opportunity to leave as Karev did! You could have been safe and far away from that bomb."

Meredith put her hands on her hips and glared at him. Mark forced himself to stay against the wall by the stairs. His Angel needed to do this on her own. He was only here for moral support and in case things got to ugly. "Say I did go off with Alex," she said in a furious voice. "I'd still have been in the hospital, doing my job, when Hannah let go. The O.R. we were in is over the main oxygen line. That bomb would have taken the entire hospital and all of us with it!"

"It was a stupid, asinine, foolish thing to do and you know it!" He shouted at her. Izzie and George appeared at the top of the stairs and Mark shook his head at them. They stubbornly came to stand next to him. "What were you thinking? Were you even thinking at all? I would have thought you had more regard for your own life than that!" He stopped and stared at her for a moment. "Oh, Meri," he said in a softer tone. "I'm sorry."

Meredith cocked her head to the side in confusion. "What? What are you sorry for? I mean, besides barging into my house and yelling at me."

Derek shook his head. "No. I'm not sorry for that. I'm sorry that I hurt you so badly that you think you have nothing left to live for." And to him that just proved exactly how much she wasn't the Angel he'd been hearing about. That Angel was strong and confident and ready for anything. He'd spent much of the time Mark had talked about this mystery woman worried that Mark had imagined her. Someone that prefect couldn't possibly exist.

Izzie and George started snickering. Mark only shook his head and moved forward to take Meredith in his arms. He used a gentle finger to close her gaping jaw and regarded his one-time friend seriously. "Go home, Derek," he told the other man. "You don't know anything about Mer. Just go home and leave her alone. She doesn't have a death wish. She didn't do anything wrong. Just leave, Der."

Izzie and George came forward and stood on either side of Meredith. "That…that's the most absurd thing I've ever heard," Meredith finally found her voice. "I am not Juliet! I didn't have any intention of dying today. Just get out, Derek. Get out of my house. I can't believe you actually think that! Go away."

Derek looked at the foursome in front of him and realized that she was right. He didn't know her anymore. "I'm glad you didn't die today," he said anyway and walked out the door.

"Okay," Izzie finally broke the silence. "Can we go to bed now? That was just a bit too much ridiculousness for me today. Seriously."

"Me too." George mumbled. "And I'm warning you now if I hear even a breath that Mer has a death wish at work I'm going to do something drastic to him."

"I'll take care of it," Mark promised. "The nurses like me. I'll drop a bug in their ears."

Meredith smirked slightly. "I've got a great family."


	31. We're Still Alive

**Disclaimer: Nope…uh-unh. Not mine. Not yet. Not ever. Cuz Mark died. And it made me sad. And George died. And Lexie died. And Susan died. Notice the trend? If I was the writer they'd probably have lived. Derek might have died though. Rewatching the episodes this way is reminding me that I don't really care much for Derek. Or Izzie. Sad but true. So nope, I don't own them.**

**A/N: I'm not sure if what I'm describing in this chapter is possible at this time of year. But it fit for Mark and Mer. It's something they would do in my story. So just go with it. I know that racing season is over but…well, it's a fun idea. So enjoy the chapter.**

**We're Still Alive**

"Where are we going?" Meredith asked him. "It's dark and it's early and I'm tired and just…where are we going?"

Mark chuckled quietly and pulled out of the driveway. "You'll see. It's a surprise." He took her hand in his and kissed her knuckles. "You'll like it though."

Meredith huffed and settled back in the passenger's seat of his BMW. "Fine, be all mysterious."

Mark grinned at her in the darkness of the car. "I will. And it's not that early, Angel. It's after six. We have time to stop for breakfast before we get to the surprise."

"Good. Cuz I'm hungry." She pouted.

He shook his head. "We've got about a forty minute drive or so. Why don't you take a nap and I'll wake you when we get there?"

Meredith leaned the seat back and nodded. "Okay."

Mark kept hold of her hand as he navigated the nearly empty streets of their neighborhood. He needed that connection right now and she was content to let him have it for the moment. They'd been given the week off as had nearly everyone else. The OR floor needed repair work and no surgeries could happen while the repairs were underway. Mark had pushed back most of his surgeries to the following week but the few that he couldn't he'd preform at other area hospitals.

He felt her fingers slowly relax within his own as she dozed. He liked this, he realized with only a small amount of shock. He liked this quiet, steady trust and acceptance from her. She had been curious as Hell about where they were going but she'd never made any indication that she was hesitant about going with him.

Meredith had big issues with trusting other people. She always had. But she'd trusted him. Nearly from the beginning she'd given him her trust. He stroked a thumb over the back of her hand and smiled. He was lucky as Hell and he knew it. He'd do his best to never give her a reason not to trust him.

"Mark?" Her voice broke into his thoughts.

"Yeah, Angel?"

"I love you." She turned in her seat so that she was on her side and facing him. "And thank you."

He glanced over at her. "For what, Angel?"

"For being with me. I don't think I could have pulled the bomb out without you there," she admitted. "I was terrified…but I knew we'd be okay."

"Me too. Well, I hoped we'd be okay. I knew you could do it though." He fought down the remembered terror of that day.

"You've never let anything bad happen to me. Ever. If you're there then I know that everything will be fine. And I know you were scared. You were shaking like a leaf in the wind." She grinned.

"Not something I'm all that proud of," he grumbled. "I shouldn't have been so scared. You needed me to be strong."

"You were strong," she argued. "You were my rock when I needed you to be. You stopped shaking and being afraid the second we had to move. It was okay to be scared before that because we were waiting. And you didn't leave me."

Mark snorted. "You couldn't have pried me away from you with a crowbar. If we were going to die that day we were going together."

Meredith closed her eyes again and nodded. "Yeah. I know. I can't breathe without you anymore. So just remember that if you ever have a patient with a bomb in them."

Mark chuffed out a laugh and shook his head. "I'm not the one that needs that kind of reminder, Angel."

She squeezed his hand and drifted off into a doze again. The next thing she knew the car was slowing to a stop. "We there?" She mumbled.

"We're at the restaurant," he confirmed. "Still hungry?"

"Duh." She untangled their fingers and set the seat back up. "Where are we?" She blinked out the windshield and considered the restaurant in front of them. "A café and bakery? Sounds good."

"Welcome to Kent Washington, Angel," he opened his door and stepped out of the car. "You ever been here?"

She stepped out on her side and then came to stand beside him. "Not that I remember," she shook her head and took his hand. "The food smells really good though. Come on." She tugged him towards the door. "Let's go eat."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"So now where?" Meredith asked as she sipped the last of her coffee. "And this was a really good pick for a restaurant. I love it."

"And now we get to the surprise," Mark tossed a few bills on the table for a tip and held out his hand for hers again. She took it and smiled up at him. "No. I'm not telling you. Stop with the eyes and the smile. You'll see when we get there."

Meredith stuck her lip out in an overdone pout that only made him laugh. "Please?" She begged while he paid the bill at the register.

He pulled her to his chest and bent his head to her ear. "Um…no," he grinned and stood up straight again. "You'll see. And you'd kill me for spoiling the surprise anyway."

She grinned and nodded. "Very true."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"A race car track?" Her voice was dubious but her eyes were shining in pleasure. "Why race cars? Is there even a race today?"

"No race," he grinned. "Well, no real professional type race. We are going to learn how to drive a race car. It's one of the few things we haven't done yet. You game?"

She threw her arms around his neck and laughed. "Hell yes! I like this surprise. This is gonna be great."

He squeezed her waist and laughed for a moment with her. "Let's do this thing, Angel."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark watched his Angel speed around the track and wondered if this had actually been one of his best ideas. She had taken to the lessons like a duck to water. Now she was going around in circles at ungodly speeds and he was trying very hard not to have a heart attack.

"That girl of yours is fast as Hell," their instructor, Ian Bradley, told him admiringly. "I've never seen a rookie that fearless."

"Please don't remind me," Mark muttered and closed his eyes as Meredith zoomed past where they were standing.

Ian laughed. "Don't fret. Brent would make her slow down if he thought it was unsafe. She's got complete control of that machine. Your girl's got a fine steady hand. She's a natural."

Mark couldn't help but grin at the praise to his Angel. "Yeah. She's like that." He nodded and opened his eyes to watch his Angel fly.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Holy Crap!" Meredith yelled as she climbed out of the race car. "That was so freaking incredible. Mark! Did you see? Holy Crap!"

"I saw, Angel," he called, amused. "You did great."

She ran over and hopped over the concrete divider and into his arms. "That was so much fun! We so have to come back." She grinned up at him and pulled off her helmet. She stopped suddenly and stared at him. "You did have fun, didn't you?"

He grinned down at her. The driving he'd done had been a blast. He'd always had a thing for driving a bit too fast and so the speed hadn't bothered him. Even if it had he'd never admit to it. Not with her face flushed and eyes sparkling with pleasure. "Yeah. I did." He answered. "We will definitely be back."

"Man," Ian said slowly. "She beat you," he chuckled. "She beat your time by ten whole seconds."

"I'm not surprised," Mark chuckled and hugged Meredith to his chest. "She's quick, this one."

"Ian, man, she beat the track record for novices by three point six seconds," Brent chimed in. "Holy crap is right, Meredith. Good driving out there."

"I did?" Meredith squeaked as Mark picked her up and swung her in circles, laughing. "Seriously?"

Ian and Brent nodded happily. "Let's get the two of you up on the Wall of Fame," Ian said and waved them inside to have their pictures taken.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Mark?" She whispered into the darkness of their bedroom later that night.

"Hm?" He mumbled and nuzzled into her neck.

"Thank you. I had fun today."

"Me too, Angel."

They lay quietly for a few moments simply soaking up each other's presence. "Mark?" She said again.

"Yeah?" He kept his voice quiet, knowing from many such late night discussions exactly what she was going to say next but still needing to hear it.

"We're still alive." She said softly.

"We're still alive." He confirmed.


	32. Yesterday

**Disclaimer: Nope. Grey's Anatomy isn't mine. But you already know this. So why are you reading this lame disclaimer? Seriously are you that hard up for reading material?**

**Yesterday**

"Morning Mommy," Meredith said as she poured out some coffee for Mark and handed it to him. "How are you this morning?"

Her mother slanted her a sly glance. "I'm exhausted."

"Me too," Meredith said over her shoulder. "You didn't have to come," she whispered to him.

"I know," he whispered back. "I wanted to."

Meredith smiled happily at him and carried the remaining two cups to the table in front of her mother. "I was going at it all night in the on call room," Ellis informed her daughter. "What's your excuse?"

Meredith nearly dropped the cups the last few inches as Mark choked on his coffee. She spun around and stared as though her mother had grown another head. "Mom." She so didn't want to know about her parent's sex life.

Her mother smirked. "I tell you, that man makes me purr like a kitten."

That was way too much information. "Mom." Meredith tried again and shot a glare at Mark who was snickering.

"When he isn't making me growl like a tiger," she continued, oblivious to her daughter's pale face. Mark covered his mouth to try and contain his laughter.

"Stop," Meredith ordered both of them.

Ellis laughed lightly. "And my husband wonders why I'm not interested in him anymore." Mark stopped laughing abruptly. It wasn't funny now. "If he had any balls at all, he would leave on his own. No," Ellis sneered. "He plays stupid."

Mark abandoned his place by the coffee cart and went to Meredith's side. He stood behind her and pulled her against his chest. "Ellis," he started.

She didn't seem to hear him. "He's waiting for me to kick him out. I come home with a hickey on my shoulder—a hickey for God's sake—like I'm some sex-crazed teenager," Meredith unconsciously put a hand to the spot just above her heart where a hickey of her own rested. Her mother laughed again. "Which, let's face it, these days, I am."

Mark covered Meredith's hand with his own. "That's different," he whispered. "You're not cheating on anyone."

Meredith nodded. "And what does Thatcher do?" Her mother went on. "Pretends he doesn't see it."

Meredith opened her mouth and closed it again. She really had no idea what to say.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

George stared at Meredith and Mark. Mark was in their locker room. Why was Mark in their locker room? He hadn't been like this for a few days. For nearly a week after the bomb incident Mark had refused to leave Meredith's side unless it was absolutely necessary. Their normal professionalism at work seemed to have gone out the window. But Meredith had finally told him to stop hovering or she'd sic Izzie on him. George thought that Mark was very lucky Bailey had still been on maternity leave.

He should just ask, he told himself. He should ask why Mark was suddenly cave man again. There had to be a reason. Meredith and Mark had been perfectly normal, for them anyway, when they'd left this morning. And now Mark was all cave man again and Meredith seemed to be out of it.

Cristina burst into the locker room. "You know, he's acting like I committed a crime, like my apartment is full of stolen goods." She complained before George had a chance to ask Mark and Meredith anything. Cristina stopped abruptly and eyed the pair before her. "Mark?"

"We're fine," Mark said curtly. He stood up and squeezed Meredith's shoulder with one hand. "Fine." He said again and left the locker room with a scowl.

"Okay," Cristina muttered after him. "He's acting like I kept my apartment to hide stolen goods so I could do illegal transplants for money."

Meredith pulled herself together. "Are you sure he's not just acting like you lied about moving in?" She asked in a coldish tone.

Cristina turned her head to regard Meredith over her shoulder. "Okay," Cristina drawled. "What's wrong with you?"

George stood a bit closer so that he could hear the answer too. "My mommy's a filthy whore," Meredith said in a dead voice. Cristina shrugged. George gulped and backed away before Meredith turned that dead gaze on him. No wonder Mark had been hovering.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Bailey bounced little Tucker as her interns surrounded her. She should have known better than to bring him with her but she didn't have much of a choice. Besides, she'd never tell them but she'd missed them too.

The chief had basically handed them off to the attendings. None of the residents could handle them. Burke and Sloan mostly handed them cases although Montgomery-Shepherd stepped in occasionally. And wonder of wonders the past week and a half had gone smoothly. Other than reports of Sloan stalking Grey they'd behaved themselves to her satisfaction and after the bomb scare Bailey really couldn't bring herself to reprimand Sloan for his overprotectiveness.

"Ooo, good morning, Dr. Bailey," Stevens cooed outrageously. "Hello baby," she waved her fingers in Tuck's face. Tuck looked up at her and gave a baby grin.

Bailey ignored the two children and focused on the rest of her brood. "Are the O.R.s up and running?" She asked.

Predictably Yang answered first. "Uh, yeah, they're fully functional. Uh, except there's some smoke damage to the corridors."

"How about you?" She asked Grey in as gentle a tone as she'd ever take with her interns. "You fully functional?" There was something off about her today. Still having a bomb in your hand wasn't something that you just got over in a week and a half.

Grey nodded. "I'm fine," she insisted. Over her shoulder George widened his eyes and shook his head at her. So Grey was over the bomb thing and there was something new distracting her. Wonderful. Hopefully Sloan could handle it. "How's your husband?"

Bailey couldn't stop the small smile. "Taking him home tomorrow," she informed them to their delighted and relieved grins. Tuck made a cooing noise and she looked down at him. "Yes, we are. Yes. Yes…" she said in a baby voice. Izzie joined in exciting Tuck into waving his arms around. "Okay," Bailey continued in her normal voice. "This is not a tea party. Go. Work. Save some lives." She ordered them. They slowly started moving off. "Now!" They ran and she smirked. "Do it now," she laughed to Tuck. "They silly ain't they? You're just gonna adore them aren't you, Tuck?"

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Invasive small-cell with a history of C.O.P.D.?" Mark said into the back of her neck after he'd brushed her hair aside. "Guy's pretty much a goner, hunh?"

"Sensitive, Mark, seriously." She giggled. "What you got going today?"

"Nothing much," he sighed and leaned on the desk beside her. "Boring. Routine. So I'll follow you around and make a nuisance of myself because Bailey's not here to stop me."

"Cristina caught a case of craniodiaphyseal dysplasia. So why don't you go bug her? Maybe you'll get a fun surgery out of it." Meredith suggested.

"Really?" Mark brightened. "Why didn't anyone tell me this before?"

Meredith shrugged. "I'm guessing because he's Derek's patient."

"I can work with Derek," Mark pouted. "I might be a bit angry at him and he's very angry with me but I can work with him."

She laughed in delight and he was glad to hear that laugh. He'd been worried that she'd sink into one of her dark and twisty days but she was holding on. "So go find Cris and see what you can do," she ordered.

"Don't the two of you have work to do?" Derek asked them in an angry voice.

Mark straightened and grinned at Derek charmingly. "Dr. Shepherd, just the man I wanted to see."

Derek glared at him and Meredith put her chart away at the other end of the desk. "No," Derek said unequivocally. "Whatever it is you want the answer is no."

"I'm hurt, Der, really." Mark put a hand to his heart. "Why do you think I want something from you?"

"You always want something," Derek huffed. "You're a user. So I don't care what it is you want. I don't care if you found out you have a brain tumor the size of Texas and you want me to operate. No. The answer is no."

Meredith glared daggers at him for that comment. "Derek," Addison joined the conversation hesitantly. "You should at least hear him out. Maybe he doesn't want something."

"Oh I want something," Mark confessed and grabbed for Meredith as she breezed past the trio to answer a page. She danced out of his reach with a laugh and an air kiss. "Later, Angel." He watched her walk away for a moment before turning back to Addison and Derek. Addison had an indulgent smile playing about her lips and Derek was his usual glaring self. "Two words, Der: craniodiaphyseal dysplasia."

"No," Derek said again.

Addison's eyes brightened though. "Really? You have a case of craniodiaphyseal dysplasia? How old is the patient?"

Derek included her in his furious glare. "No." He stated again and walked off.

Addison frowned after him and then turned to Mark. "Which intern are we bribing?" She asked.

"Cris," he answered promptly.

"Yes!" Addison cheered. "She's easy. Just let her in on the surgery and she'll do anything you want."

Mark let a sly smile spread over his lips. "I know. How do you think I get all the good coffee around here? Her and Alex have some kind of a competition going. But she only wants the cool surgeries. She has her heart set on cardio. Alex wants plastics but I don't think he'll actually end up choosing it."

"Do you know what they're all going to choose already? And are we starting a pool on it?" She walked beside him down the corridors in search of their favorite angry intern.

"Nope, only suspicions and sure."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Alex," Mark poked his head into the room where Alex was looking at some films. "You seen Cris?"

"Not since she caught the lionitis case," Alex pouted. "You gonna talk to him? Can I come?"

Mark looked at Addison and then grinned at Alex. "Sure. Since Yang's actually Derek's intern you can be mine. If we can talk the parents into the surgery. How old is the patient anyway?"

"Fifteen."

Addison's pager beeped and she cursed. "Find me if you get the case," she ordered. "I wanna see it too."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith sighed as she put Mr. Eaton's chart in the holder outside his room. She could understand some of what he meant. He didn't want to go to his grave with everyone in his life not knowing the truth. But…sometimes the truth really did hurt. It hurt a lot more than most gave it credit for.

"Meredith," the Chief greeted as he walked past her.

"Chief," Meredith returned and then paused. He would know. He and her mother had done the whole of their residency together. He would know who her mother had slept with. "Chief," she called after him without giving it another thought. "Can I ask you something not work-related?"

The chief looked over at her and nodded as they both leaned against the nurse's desk. "Okay."

"Do you remember my father?" Meredith started out slowly. Did she really want to know this information?

He froze for an instant. Barely noticeable but enough for her to realize that he did know. "Of course," he answered.

"Do you know why he left?"

"I believe your mother asked him too," the Chief looked down at her and felt a surge of regret. She could have been his but she wasn't and he'd stayed with his wife and left her to the not so tender mercies of an absent father and a cold mother.

Meredith nodded. "Right, but do you know why?" She pressed.

The chief pulled his glasses off and shook his head in a sad, pained way. "No," he lied. "No, I'm sorry, I don't." Why was he lying? What was he trying to spare her from? "Well," he continued. "Have a good day."

Meredith nodded. "Thanks. You too," and she let him walk away.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Derek handed the file to Cristina. "Dr. Yang, book an O.R. please," he requested in a curt tone. He knew she didn't like him but they were both grown-ups. They could be professional but he wasn't about to favor her like the rest of them did. All the other attendings let Bailey's interns do just about whatever they wanted and he had no intention of following that path again.

They rounded the corner and stopped dead. Cristina covered her smile with a hand. So Mark had found the family anyway. Shepherd had kept her running all morning in an effort to keep Mark away from this case. Jake was a funny kid though and nice and he deserved to hear all the options open to him. Besides it would one up McShiny which was always good.

"How—how is that possible?" Jake's mom was asking Mark in a hopeful but disbelieving tone.

"It's precision work," he told her in his 'I'm a doctor, trust me' voice. "It won't be easy, but—"

"Dr. Sloan," Derek started in a furious tone. "Can I help you with something?"

Mark turned to look at him with a serious expression. "He says he can fix my face," Jake piped up happily. "He says he can make me look like normal."

Derek gave the boy a tight smile. "It is possible, but tricky. Would you all excuse Dr. Sloan and I while we discuss the logistics of the possibility?" He didn't wait for an answer. He grabbed Mark's elbow and pulled him from the room.

"What's he mad about?" Jake asked while his parents sent worried looks towards the door.

Alex snickered. "Pissing contest, kid."

Cristina scowled at him. "Shut up, Evil Spawn." She looked down at Jake. "Dr. Shepherd and Dr. Sloan have a few personal issues that they seem to be letting affect their working relationship."

Jake let out a knowing laugh. "Oh, girl troubles."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Alex and Cristina stood side by side on the catwalk outside the Chief's office watching the action inside the room through the walls of windows. "What did he say?" Alex asked. "Did you hear that?"

"Did he call him a crack whore?" Cristina asked astonished. "I'm telling Mer if he did."

Alex put his hands on his hips and narrowed his eyes. "Why would he call him a crack whore?"

"Oh, shut up," Cristina scolded. "I'm trying to read lips."

"You shut up, crack whore."

"Look, Shepherd's gesturing, big gesturing." Cristina pointed.

"What do you got?" George asked curiously as he stopped beside them.

"Shepherd and Sloan battling it out again," Alex said with a grin.

"Oh, it's getting good," Cristina cheered.

"Why what do you got?" Alex asked without taking his eyes off of the battle in the chief's office.

George shrugged. "Just a woman down in the E.R. ...having spontaneous orgasms," he told them in a bland tone.

Cristina and Alex stared at him and then ran for the E.R. as fast as they could. The Shepherd/Sloan battle to the death happened a lot more often than spontaneous orgasms did.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"That is not the point!" Derek yelled loudly over Mark's reasonings.

Mark didn't even twitch at his loud voice. He stayed relaxed and in control. He knew Derek wasn't just angry about him talking to Jake and his parents. Derek had finally found a way to let loose over Addison and Meredith. Mark let him rant. He knew he was in the wrong over Addison but Derek wasn't lily white either. Meredith on the other hand. Derek was completely at fault for Mark's Angel. And Mark was totally in the clear on that score. Even the chief knew it. "The point is the kid wants his face fixed and I wanna do it."

"The point is you wanna get published," Derek shouted.

"Well, yeah," Mark admitted. "And I'm guessing Dr. Webber does too. You know how the press loves a good before and after shot, Richard."

Richard sighed. He was probably one of the only people in the entire hospital that didn't like these little battles. Though that was probably only because they always happened in his office. "Derek, out of friendship to you, I would love to tell him no. Sort of," he added when Derek started to smirk. His eyes conveyed his disapproval for Derek's treatment of two of the finest women he'd ever known and Derek's face fell. "But as chief—"

Derek shook his head, even knowing it was futile. "Please don't say it," he asked softly.

Richard ignored him. "Mark, if you can get the parents to sign a consent form…"

Mark kept his face impassive as he nodded. He picked up his lab coat and swept out of the office.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Addison checked her schedule as she headed for the chief's office. She might just need an O.R. for Ms. Calva. She lifted her head and stopped abruptly. Mark and Derek were just leaving Richard's office. She lifted a brow at Mark and he grinned and nodded.

"Oh, come on," Derek growled. "Is there anyone in this hospital that isn't trying to ruin my day?" He stormed off.

"So you get the surgery then?" Addison asked with a smile.

"Yep." Mark stood beside her. "You free?"

"Don't know yet," she answered. "Might need to book an O.R. for a case I just caught. You gonna ask Mer to assist?"

"Nah," he shook his head. "She's with Burke today and he's been getting a bit squirrely about my hogging her."

"Well, he has a point," Addison laughed. "And I have to go catch the chief. I'll try to make lunch."

"You know where we'll be," he replied and waved her off.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"I think you're making it up," Alex accused as he, Izzie and George joined Mark, Meredith and Cristina at their normal table.

"He's not," Izzie defended.

"I'm not," George chimed in.

"I saw it four times," Izzie continued.

"What?" Meredith asked and batted Mark's hand away from her ice cream.

"A woman with spontaneous orgasms," George chortled.

"Oh yeah," Cristina nodded sarcastically. "Uh-hunh."

Meredith sat up straight. "Really?"

"You're just jealous 'cause you didn't see it yourself," George grinned.

"Dude, I totally am," Alex admitted.

"Wait, spontaneous orgasms?" Mark asked. "Why am I only hearing about this now?"

George shrugged. "That could have something to do with your battle in the chief's office with Shepherd but then again…maybe Addie's hiding it from you so you don't steal it or something."

"Dammit," Mark cursed. "That's why she might need an O.R. That bitch kept that close to her chest."

"What bitch?" Addison asked. "Move over, Karev," she ordered and pulled a chair up between him and Cristina.

"You," Mark pouted. "You vile mistress of Satan. You have a spontaneous orgasm case and you didn't share."

"So which of you is Satan then?" Meredith asked. "You or Shepherd? Cuz if it's either of you then Addie and I can form a Mistresses of Satan club and I can officially drop my membership in the Dirty Mistresses Club. Mistress of Satan sounds so much better."

"Wait," Addison complained. "I thought I was Satan. I was just beginning to enjoy being the Ruler of all that is Evil."

"So sleep with Mer and then you can be Satan and she can be your mistress and I can watch," Mark suggested.

Addison and Meredith shared a look and both shook their heads. "Nope," they chimed.

"Damn," all the men at the table sighed.

"You know, you all suck," Meredith pouted suddenly. "I mean, seriously, I hate you." She pointed at Mark, Cristina and Alex. "You three get craniodiaphyseal dysplasia." She moved her finger to Addison, Izzie and George. "You three get spontaneous orgasms. And what do I get? A bitter, making hate tape guy with Invasive small-cell with a history of C.O.P.D. Seriously I hate you all." She glared at mark. "This is all your fault."

Mark stared at her in shock. "How is it my fault?"

"If you hadn't been hovering then Burke would never have forbidden me from your service today. It's your fault."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

He couldn't believe how much Mark seemed to have turned everyone against him. Even the nurses had been giving him dirty looks since the bomb thing. Well, no, since the day after the bomb thing. And several of them, Olivia included had turned and walked away from him when he'd tried to ask if Meredith was receiving counseling. Even Richard had told him to mind his own business.

And now his patient was listening to Mark's advice instead of his. At least the parents were more interested in saving his life.

He stalked down the halls and suddenly stopped. There she was. Finally he could talk to her alone. "You've given up surgery to go into clerical work?" He teased her.

"I'm fulfilling a patient's dying wish," she told him primly. "By sending hate mail to everyone he's ever met."

"Ah," he nodded and smiled sadly at her. "Yeah, right now I can understand the impulse."

"Me, too," she agreed but he could tell by her twinkling eyes that she didn't really mean it. Meri could never hate someone. She didn't have it in her. "Why do people cheat?"

Derek felt hope rise in his chest. "That's a good question. I warned you he would though."

Meredith let out a laugh. "I wasn't talking about me and Mark," she giggled. "I'm not going to say he'd never cheat on me. He might. But then I might cheat on him, though I can't imagine that. He's been my rock since before I started med school. I meant someone else." She gathered her thoughts and realized exactly who she'd been speaking too. "Sorry. Forgot it was a sore subject with you."

He shook his head at her continued obliviousness to Mark's shortcomings. "Meri," he started.

"Come on, man, Jake's ready to roll," Mark leaned around the door frame. He looked at Meredith and then at Derek and rolled his eyes. "I'm sorry. Am I interrupting something?"

Meredith gave him a wide grin. "A discussion on why cheaters cheat," she told him boldly. She stood up and grabbed the bag of addressed hate tapes.

Mark grabbed her hips and drew her into him. "So is this in general or pertaining to a specific case of cheating?" He lowered his head and nibbled at her jawline.

Meredith giggled at the sensation of his beard under her chin and held up the tapes. "Just wondering," she said.

Derek glared at them for a moment. "Hey, she asked me," he said with his hands up in surrender. "If you ask me maybe your girlfriend isn't as sure of your relationship as she wants us all to believe."

Meredith let out another giggle and kissed Mark's cheek as she left the room. "Or maybe a question is just a question."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"We should ask him to do it anyway," Alex said quietly as they cleaned up the tools after Jake's unsuccessfully surgery.

"You think he'd do it?" Cristina countered.

"I think he'd do just about anything Mer asked him to," Alex said after a bit of thought. "And more if it would make her smile."

"Yeah."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Mark," Cristina called and opened the door of the attendings locker room. "I mean…um," she swallowed at the sight before her. That chest belonged on a Greek God. Mark was so very well built he was taking even her breath away.

Alex rolled his eyes at her. "Dr. Sloan," he started formally as this was a professional request.

Mark faced them head on. "Yeah?"

Alex drew in a deep breath. "Is there any reason you can't do the procedure anyway?" He asked quickly before he lost his nerve. He didn't think he'd ever seen Mark so serious and sad.

Mark's countenance brightened just a little. "Not really," he said slowly. Then he arched an eyebrow at them. "Who are you winning brownie points for?"

Cristina laughed. "All of us actually." She confessed. "But also because it's what he wanted."

"Yeah, yeah he did," Mark nodded. "Let's go."

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

"Hey, Mer," George called out to her. "Wanna come out for a drink tonight?" He leaned his elbows on the counter and smiled at her.

Meredith tore a page from the phonebook she was looking through. "I have something I have to do and then I'll meet you guys there." She took a breath and shook her head. "I don't want to make video tapes on my deathbed, George." She spun around and sped off. "Tell Mark that. He'll know what it means."

"All right," he yelled after her retreating form. "But if he gets all pissy with me for letting you go alone I will make you pay, Grey!"

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Meredith eyed the house. It was a nice house. Smaller than her mother's but still nice. She should have brought Mark with her. Seriously. This was stupid. But it had to be done.

She walked up the sidewalk and rang the bell before she could second guess herself again. And then she waited. And waited. She'd always been impatient so she rang again. And then waited. Finally he came to the door and their eyes caught through the glass.

An eternity passed as they stared at each other through the pain of glass on the door and then he slowly opened it. Another eternity of silence passed. And then Meredith couldn't take it anymore. "She had an affair," she stated baldly.

His jaw dropped for a moment. He nodded slowly. "Y-yes," he stuttered.

"Why didn't you stay and fight for us?"

He came out onto the porch and closed the door behind him. The click of it closing felt like a door slamming closed in her heart. "I did. I-I tried." He said weakly.

She felt the tears gather in her eyes but she refused to let them fall in front of him. "Why didn't you try harder? You just left."

He just looked at her for a long moment and then his eyes skipped away and over her head. "Meredith," one lone tear escaped her tight control and she brushed it away irritably. "Is there anything that you need?" He finally asked her. "A-anything at all?"

She wanted to scream at him that she wanted answers. That she deserved to have answers. But the thought of a tall, gentle, cocksure, arrogant man sitting in a warm bar penetrated her mind and she shook her head. "No." She answered. "I don't need anything from you." She turned and walked away from him. She had Mark. She would have liked to have a dad growing up but now…now she was an adult and she had a life and she had her Mark and the family she had chosen for herself. A family that loved her for who she was, dark, twisties and all. He couldn't give her that so she walked away without looking back.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

Mark pushed the keys on his phone rapidly while he waited for the elevator. George's cryptic message from Meredith had confused him until he remembered the hate tapes. He knew what she'd gone to do and he was worried. She hadn't texted him back yet.

The bell dinged and he stepped on without looking up. He hit the button for the ground floor and 'send' at the same time and then looked up at a cleared throat beside him.

He turned to Derek with a small frown of shared pain. "Don't beat yourself up—" he started to advise.

Derek jumped out of the elevator before the doors could close. "I'll take the stairs."

"Aw, come on," Mark said angrily.

"Derek," Addison said in a hurt voice.

"How come you can forgive her but not me?" Mark finally asked the question that had been plaguing him since before he came to Seattle.

"I didn't forgive her," Derek said immediately. "And with you I have no obligation to try." He gave them both a disgusted look and walked away.

Mark let the door close and pulled Addison into his arms. "I'm so sorry," he told her softly. "I think your marriage is over, Addie."

Addison nodded with a sniffle against his chest. "I know. But I don't want it to be."

He rocked her sympathetically. "I know. Wanna come get drunk with us?"

She pulled her head back and gave him a shaky smile. "Us?" She asked.

"Me and Mer and whatever Rosemary's babies are free." He answered.

"Bad days all around?"

"Mer just went to go see the father she hasn't heard from in twenty years," he answered. "And she hasn't texted or called back so it didn't go well. Jake died. So yeah, bad days all around."

"I think I'd like that," she nodded.

**MS/MG MS/MG MS/MG**

It wasn't a happy group that gathered that evening at Joe's. Joe watched them come in, mostly alone and with frowns. Cristina was first and she claimed their table with a scowl and ordered her vodka straight up. But she didn't drink it. Burke followed her moments later and sat beside her silently after he'd ordered his whiskey.

Joe felt his own frown forming. Normally those two would chatter like magpies over some surgery they'd done that day but they were silent tonight. Too silent.

Alex came next. He grabbed his beer at the bar and sat on the other side of Cristina sipping at it in silence.

Then came Izzie. She at least had a smile until she caught sight of the morose group at the table and her smile faded. She ordered her rum and coke and sat on Alex's side. Adding her silence to the already silent table.

George greeted him cheerfully enough when he came in and ordered his beer before the silence infected him too. His easy smile dropped and he dropped down beside Burke with a sigh.

To Joe's surprise Addison and Mark came in together, quietly ordered a double scotch, single malt for him and a black and gold for her, before joining the rest of the group at the table and sitting in silence.

No one spoke. They barely moved. And the last of their group was still missing. Joe's heart started to thump in fear. Had something happened to Mer again? This could not bode well for the others. But the bell dinged and Meredith slumped in, shoulders down and tear tracks lining her cheeks. He handed over the bottle of tequila and a shot glass without prompting. Meredith gave him a nod and made her way to the table. She settled between George and Mark, leaned into Mark's side and poured a shot.

The spell of silence seemed to break when she slammed back the shot and poured another. The conversation was still stilted and quieter than normal but Joe could see the normalcy slowly taking over. They would be all right. This patched together family. Like the conversations they were having they would slowly heal each other. It wouldn't happen overnight but they were all there for the long haul.

Joe breathed out a sigh of relief and sent another round of their dark and twisty days drinks to them. It was rare that they all had one on the same day but Joe knew that the companionship of the others would smooth out the twisties and brighten up the dark.


End file.
